There are so many things you discover about yourself and your significant other when you’re planning a wedding. Like, it turns out Mr. Whale is a bit of a fashionista (fashionisto?).
At some point early on in wedding planning, I showed him a picture that I really liked (I want some gigantic swirly lollipops).
Image from Green Wedding Shoes Image by Jamie Hammond
Mr. Whale just loved what the groom is wearing. I thought, “Sure, that guy looks pretty dapper. And I love his tie. My groom is going to look great.” Fast forward to now. We recently discussed what he was going to wear. And he told me he wants a white suit.
Yes, you read that right. White….
Apparently, he remembered the groom wearing a white suite in that picture. I tried to tell him it’s more of a very pale tan, but he insists (even after looking at the picture again) that he wants to wear white. While I love my fiance fiercely, all I can picture are those weird guys in high school who show up to prom in white tuxes and think they’re sooooo cool.
Image from Derek Grasman
I know, he’s not going to look like an eleventh grade kid trying to be cool. But my biggest fear is: what if his suit doesn’t match my dress? He doesn’t know anything about my dress, and I don’t want to give anything away! I guess I could try an request a swatch of fabric and then we could match the suit to my dress. But we don’t have that much money to spend on his suit…
I’m mostly hoping he’ll decide he’d rather just buy a gray or black suit so that he can wear it again some day…But maybe I should be a good fiancee and let him wear what he wants? Any other brides out there with grooms that who white?
yikes! someone on my facebook had a groom who wore a white suit… while she wore a sort of cream/ivory gown. it looked bad! beware!
omg.. please stop him now! this is bad.. so so bad. My husband wanted to wear light gray becuase he loved his prom tux (his prom picture is just as epic as the one you posted). His mother and I got him into a Navy suit looking dapper by telling him it really made his eyes pop and how handsome he was. Flattery.. USE IT LIKE A SWORD.
Don’t do it Mr. Whale…just say no!!! j/k. I think its a good idea as you mentioned to provide him with a swatch!
I have to agree with the others who said no way to the white suit/tux! I have never seen anyone actually look good in one. I would go with him to try on a few suits and have him see for himself what all the different possibilities are color-wise. I bet he will change his mind after trying on a few different options. Good Luck 
Have you shown him pictures of white suit weddings? I would collect a bunch to show to him so he knows what he’s really saying he wants. Then as a sneaky back-up, I’d have pictures more along the lines of the one he liked above, which is a light tan with a shirt to match your dress. Once he can really see what his options are, he might see the light.
Eeeek! I am in the SAME boat!
My fiance has his heart set on wearing a white tux. I am frankly terrified …but after all it is his wedding, too.
My uncle wanted to wear a white suit. His finace convinced him to wear black pants and an ivory jacket that was the same shade as her dress. He looked great. Don’t worry. You should definitely request that swatch of fabric though to match up.
Oh my god! Poor Miss Whale!
FI and my first date was prom and he wore a white tux (with a black shirt). I didnt know he was going to and when I saw him in it I honestly reconsidered dating him for a moment lol
I mean, it is his wedding too but maybe suggest he spend some time on google images and try and find pics of white suits he likes?
he’ll either
A. realize a white suit is not the best idea
or
B. find a suit that looks good, and then you can try and find a decidedly non prom-tux-y white suit
I agree, a white suite is a little old fashioned, but if he REALLY wants to wear it, then you might have to compromise. Its both of your day. One option could be a light gray, tan or black tux with an all white t-shirt, vest and tie. I know when we went tux shopping, they asked what color my dress is: white, ivory, etc. You definetly want to make sure he is in the right shade to match your dress so you dont clash. Saying in front of him what shade your dress is will not give away anything about your dress. Guys dont know the different shades of white like we do!
I think you have to let him do it. How would you feel if he dictated your dress?
I would explain the swatch thing to him (Mr. D got to see a swatch of my dress to make sure his yellow shirt wouldn’t look dirty or weird next to my dress) but if he really wants it… he really wants it.
I can’t figure out how to show you these pics of my uncle at his wedding through weddingbee. I really feel that you don’t need to worry and these pics will make you feel better, so I posted them on my blog and this is the link to the post so you can see them: http://lifeofrose.wordpress.com/2012/11/16/dressing-the-boys-part-1/.
Show him these replies!! My friend just got married and wore the BEAUTIFUL Belle dress from Alfred Angelo. Her groom wore a bright white tux… she looked like a glowing bride while he looked like he was wearing a COSTUME (and he didn’t get a haircut either!). Not to mention that stark white is very harsh in photographs. Spin it to him that way! Gray, beige or black photograph better than white, and tell him only the bride is supposed to wear white anyway. lol Good luck!
Nothing better than a man who knows what he wants. Maybe once he tries some suits on he would rather go with a beige, light tanned suit.
We did a taupe and white seer-sucker that was amazing! Maybe show him different kinds of material and then explain that white is *your* color for the day!
sigh. he doesn’t get to dictate what you wear, why are you doing it to him?
but still. white suit. gross.
I agree with Dragon – show hima swatch of your dress, and if he STILL wants to wear the white suit, let him… It’s his day too. But make sure you take advantage of the bright colors and def get a photo opp with some oversize lollipops – too cute!
I am really not a fan of white suits, but one of my friends’ husbands did it and it didn’t look that bad (although he has a dark skin tone, so it looked nice). I don’t think you should dictate what he wears, but maybe you could have him try on a few and show him how much better another color will look.
My FH requested ivory tuxes, not just for him but for all the guys. I agree with the people who said that he doesn’t have input on what your dress looks like, so why would you choose his attire? The wedding is for both of you! Yes, white might look a little weird. But if your dress is white, I don’t think it will look THAT weird. If your dress is ivory, like mine is, then why not suggest ivory suits? I do think you might should show him some examples, but don’t say “I like this better” or “This looks terrible.” Just show him. Worst case scenario, your groom looks a little weird, but that reflects his personality and his input on the wedding. And aren’t his weirdnesses and personality quirks what made you fall in love with him?
Just as a side note, we took our formal bridal pictures already, and the ivory tux looked amazing. In fact, I can’t imagine him in a black tux or any other color for that matter. For us, I think anything but ivory would have looked weird. It fits FH, and it fits our wedding!
!!! White suits are actually really popular here in Hawaii. All the boys wear them to prom, and a lot of grooms wear them as well. I think one reason is because a lot of our grooms wear maile lei during the wedding and the white suit sets it off nicely. Then again, a lot of people here get married in nice slacks and a Tommy Bahama so maybe we’re just different.
Mrs. Blue Whale, College Park, MD Age and Occupation: 27, Graduate Student Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Graduate Student Engagement Date: March 10, 2012 Wedding Date: May 2013 Venue: Southern Tree Plantation in Blairsville, GA About Me: I love bright colors, glitter, sugar, cheese, tiny animals, talking in silly accents, dancing, and all things music. I love to plan things, but when it comes time to execute the plans, I tend to panic. My friends tell me that I remind them of a mix between a cartoon character and a Disney Princess. Mr. Blue Whale and I are Southerners at heart, but we’ve been transplanted to the East Coast for school. We both love barbecues, star-gazing, bonfires, music, making up nonsense words, and generally being silly. Our wedding will be a fun-filled destination wedding in the Blue Ridge Mountains. It will most certainly feature bright colors, '80s music, and glitter.
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