Meeting of the Parents

Since it’s a holiday week here in the US, I thought I’d take a break from the DIY posting to deviate to a new topic for a little bit. (I’d like to apologize to the non-US bees in advance, sorry that it’s holiday related!)

Thanksgiving. I would have to say that Thanksgiving is probably one of, if not my favorite, holiday. After all, it combines some of my favorite things on the whole world: good food, great people, and highly discounted shopping.


The first picture that PBear and I ever took together was during our Thanksgiving dinner five years ago. (Gosh we look so young—we had just started dating and PBear was nicely pretending to understand my orgo homework.)

Each year, around this time of year, I think about the things I’m thankful for and I reminisce at how much has changed in the last year. And last year’s Thanksgiving was kind of a special holiday. It was going to be the first time that PBear’s and my parents were going to meet. I guess one of the (dis?)advantages of meeting your significant others in college is that you don’t have to meet the parents for a while and your parents definitely don’t meet each other for longer than that.

Photo by: Braedon Flynn Photography on Grey Likes Weddings via

Thus, after we got engaged, our parents thought it was about time to get everyone together, but we didn’t really have an opportunity until Thanksgiving.

I guess this is one of those meetings that I wanted so desperately wanted to go well. I love my parents and I love PBear’s parents, and I really, really, really wanted them to like each other. With my overly psychotic imagination, I started imagining worst case scenarios. I kept imagining something like Meet the Fockers, where not only they would hate each other, but it would be super awkward and hilarious (to everyone else). After all, spending three days in the same house over a holiday is a bit of an intense meeting for the first time.

Thus, it was with mild trepidation that I opened the door when my parents drove up to PBear’s house. But honestly, I really didn’t have anything to worry about. The second they met, they started talking like they were old friends…and then they didn’t stop talking for three days straight.


Our dads played many enthusiastic games of foosball while talking about whatever dads talk about, our moms hung out while talking about whatever moms talk about, and all the while, my sister, PBear and I hid and played video games. And at some point, a group of us went wedding dress shopping (another post!).


Even though I was initially very hesitant about them meeting before the wedding, I’m really glad that they did. It was nice knowing that while we had different cultural upbringings, we are all similar in other ways. It was an amazing feeling having our parents all there together supporting us. All and all, it was a really lovely and quiet Thanksgiving, with lots of good food and lots of bonding. It helped to solidify the whole wow-we’re-really-doing-this-whole-getting-married-thing feeling.

How did everyone else’s parents finally meet? Did you do the extended vacation like we did? Did it go smoothly or was it as crazy as it is often portrayed in the movies?


Mrs. Panda

Boston, MA
Wedding Date:
June 2013
PaC Man & Wife: Dance Me to the End of Love
Ending my Hen Do!

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  1. Member
    BookishBelle 1629 posts, Bumble bee @ 7:08 am

    Because we also met in college, he didn’t meet my parents until a few months in (he came to visit over summer break), I didn’t meet his mom until about a year in (she lives MUCH further away and requires a plane ride rather than a car or train), and our parents didn’t meet each other until 3.5 years later at our graduation. And 2 years later that’s still the only time they’ve met in person, but his mom is coming to our xmas this year! It really is nerve wracking!

  2. Member
    debeachgirl 543 posts, Busy bee @ 7:14 am

    Our parents met at a BBQ. They live about 20 minutes from each other. It was very casual. I met FI Mom shortly after we started dating for dinner. He knew my parents right away b/c we met when I worked for my parents and he worked next door.

    Thanksgiving this year will be special for us b/c it was this weekend last year and seeing me with his whole family that finally made FI take the plunge and get a ring and ask me to marry him (after close to 5 years of dating). He managed to get it all together to propose by Christmas Eve.

  3. Member
    blonde17jess 1290 posts, Bumble bee @ 7:57 am

    Our families will probably never be all in the same place except at the wedding, because we grew up on opposite coasts. It’s unfortunate, but it’s reality (and in some ways, it’s good because our families are crazy. :)) My mom and his dad did get to meet at his grad school graduation, because my mom came along to support him (aww) and his dad came. His parents are divorced and his mom lives across the country, so we see her every other year or so, so the odds of her meeting my family before the wedding are slim. We have odd family dynamics, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t sometimes wish they could all meet each other.

  4. Member
    Miss-Mauverick 1479 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:46 am

    Oh boy. I’m a bad monkey. Our respective parents met for the first time during our Rehearsal Dinner, 3 days before the wedding. We’d each spent lots of time with the other’s family, but we never got everyone together till the wedding week. I’m pretty sure we didn’t do this on purpose.

  5. Member
    This Time Round 10219 posts, Sugar Beekeeper @ 9:19 am

    Aaaah yes Meeting THE Family

    First time round…

    My Ex-H and I both met in Uni… and as he was from another Province, there were plenty of times he’d come home with me to my Parent’s house for a visit (Long Weekends – Canadian Thanksgiving – Easter Weekend etc)

    I didn’t meet his Parents tho until the summer we graduated, just before we got engaged. Met the rest of his clan (Brothers, Sisters, Grandparents, Aunts & Uncles) the following summer, just before we got married.

    My Ex-H came from a HUGE family with ethnic roots, so meeting everyone was both intimidating for me (best advice I ever got… was SMILE a lot) but also at the same time a lot of fun.

    This time round…

    Mr TTR and I are an Older Encore Couple (I am 50+ and he is 60+)… and so it is mostly about “the kids”. He met mine within 6 months or so of us dating, and I met his somewhere around the same timeframe. As all the kids are grown adults in their 20s and 30s, they have their own busy lives… we tho get along well together for the most part.

    My Elderly Father is still living, and Mr TTR met him somewhere within the first year of us dating… they hit it off right away. And of course My Dad was sooo amazed when Mr TTR “asked him for His Blessing” of our Engagement / Marriage. For sure one of the best days of my life with Mr TTR (lol, so far) 😉

    Mr TTR makes me laugh when he says “when I grow up I want to be just like your Dad”…

  6. Member
    Beaukat 317 posts, Helper bee @ 9:23 am

    My parents met my FI’s on the day I moved in with him… eep! It was a brief “how’d ya do” in his parents driveway before we left again, but later on that month my parents came to the city and we had a proper family dinner.

    Since then, my parents try and get to the city every 6 months or so to have dinner with everyone.

  7. Member
    zacg777 48 posts, Newbee @ 9:34 am

    Hmmm, I’ve been with my FI for 7 years and our parents STILL haven’t met! They live at opposite sides of the country (although here in England, that is only 5 hours away) so it’s not that easy. We only have a few months until we get married so we are having a very belated engagement / getting to know you party in January hopefully! Otherwise it will be the day before the wedding when the two families finally meet!

  8. graywolf Member
    graywolf 725 posts, Busy bee @ 10:43 am

    aww im glad it worked out well! my mom met wolfmans parents when she picked us up from the airport once…so it barely counted. then they didnt talk at all until at my shower! it was good but there def havent been that many opps for interaction…

  9. mswallaby Member
    mswallaby 2070 posts, Buzzing bee @ 12:05 pm

    Our parents met for the first time last Thanksgiving too, and they got along great – it made Mr. w and I feel so much better! Soon after, his family booked a trip to visit my parents in Seattle, and they’ve become close ever since. Family means the world to us. So glad it worked out for you two too!

  10. mspony Member
    mspony 9265 posts, Buzzing Beekeeper @ 7:10 pm

    Our patents didn’t meet until when we graduated from grad school, which was quite a stressful weekend. Luckily, they got along great!

  11. Member
    MrsCov 50 posts, Worker bee @ 6:09 am

    Our parents didn’t meet for the first time until we’d been seeing each other for about 18 months when we all took a trip away together. They got on great, which was really important to me for some reason. And my husband proposed during that same trip! Our siblings didn’t meet until the day before the wedding though.

  12. Member
    Red Poppy 31 posts, Newbee @ 7:30 am

    Love that first Thanksgiving photo… It’s really sweet!

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