Like Mrs. Mink, I pondered some time ago the unplugged ceremony. After reading Mrs. Mink’s post again, I went and visited the article she mentions on Offbeat Bride about the unplugged wedding ceremony. Once again, I saw this gem of a photo:
Image via Offbeat Bride / Photo by Aurora-Photography
Now. As someone who works as a social media manager, I totally understand capturing moments and sharing them. Even from a guest perspective, I can see why they would want to capture their own photos of the day. Heck, as a bride, I know I’m going to be really impatient to get my photos back, so I’m actually looking forward to seeing some guest photos…of the reception.
(Image via Instagram user fletcherdonivon of the lovely Savannah’s wedding)
That’s right—of the reception. I know, I know—some people (including some of our guests) will see it as rude that we request them to put away their cameras and phones during the ceremony. I’m sure there may be some disappointment that they’re being asked not to Instagram, tweet, and etc. throughout our ceremony. But as someone who spends so much time on social media, I can very easily attest to the fact that when I post a photo, I’ll take a quick scroll down my feed. Sure—I’ll send that tweet quickly, but then I’ll see another tweet and want to respond. Or maybe I’ll get a text when I go to take that photo, and respond to that after I get my photo. While I’m sure not everyone gets sucked in like me, I know a lot of people do.
So instead of getting photos back with guests looking at their laps, we’re going to ask guests to disconnect during the ceremony. The recessional? Throughout the reception? Please snap away, discreetly. (That’s my nice way of saying don’t get in Stacy’s way.)
(Image via Instagram user jacirenea, again of the lovely Savannah’s wedding)
Now the question becomes, since we’re skipping programs, how will we communicate this request to our guests? I feel very strongly about this, so it’s important to me that it’s communicated very clearly. Well, first, it will be on our chalkboard program. We’re also going to ask our DJ to announce our request just as the ceremony begins. Hopefully these two reminders will allow our guests to be present with us as we enjoy what the whole day is really about—the ceremony.
If you had an unplugged ceremony, how did it turn out?
I’m working on a post about this. I’m a social media person, too.
I completely regret my unplugged ceremony. Completely. Like I’ve shed tears over it.
The post is coming.
I can’t hep, but I’m so considering having an unplugged ceremony. Our vicar doesnt allow flash apart from the main photographer and don’t get me wrong I LOVE guest photos, theyre sometimes the best, I’ll never forget a gorgeous photo of my friend entering the church arch on her fathers arm with the sun shining behind her- which lit up her veil. Beautiful!
However in my SIL2Bs no.1s wedding SIL2B no.2s huge husband leant into the aisle to take a picture of SIL2B no.1 as she walked down the aisle. She had to walk around him. I will hit him if he does that at our wedding!
I’m going to have an unplugged ceremony as well… I want all attention 100% on the goings-on, not fiddling with cameras, phones etc… Looking forward to further thoughts on how to manage this with the guests…
@Mrs. Mink: I’m anxious to read that post, Mink! I’m pretty set on it but then sometimes I’ll see photos and think “oh, I won’t get those.” Hopefully your post can help direct me!!
@Darcy212: yikes! I hope nobody would do that regardless of why they did it, but situations like that definitely worry me. Especially since I’ve asked people to bring along my own camera for the morning before our photographer arrives. 
@jojoannanz: Signage (about this issue in particular) coming soon! 
I planned on doing an unplugged ceremony, but in the end, I forgot to tell the officiant to make an announcement about it. We didn’t get any amazing ceremony photos from our guests – in fact, I’m not a big fan of any of them, a lot are blurry or too dark – but way fewer people took photos than I expected. I was worried that my FIL, who ALWAYS takes photos and who was sitting in the front row, would take photos the whole time, but he just sat and watched and listened. I’m not 100% sold either way on unplugged ceremonies anymore.
I didn’t even think about having an unplugged ceremony (just b/c I never thought about it ). Our ceremony went smoothly and none of our photos look like that first one you posted (with everyone taking pics). Our ceremony was outside in daylight so flashes were not an issue either. Honestly, there are quite a few of our friends pics that I love! I even used a few in our final wedding album. It was nice to have “the same picture” from different perspectives/view points.
I want not only an unplugged ceremony, but also I want an Instagram free wedding.
I really don’t want 20 people taking photos from different angles, with different cameras and different qualities, I know it might sound rude, but I want the photographer to be the only person taking photos during the ceremony and reception, why? Because honestly I don’t want to find out 1 year later that there is a public album on someones Facebook called “xxx and xxx wedding” with comments of people I don’t know.
To ease this situation my plan is to put a few disposable cameras on the reception tables and I’m gonna make a little game I saw once on Pinterest, Its a list of funny things and details that people need to take pictures of, this is for those people who need to be taking pictures all the time! I think its something nice, and I don’t have to worry later about my pics.
PS: Oh by the way this is my first post 
I got a GREAT cellphone photo of the ceremony texted to me while my husband and I were in the car en route to the reception. I looked at it every day on our honeymoon multiple times a day. I really liked having it.
I also think that it’s a bit…demanding to tell your guests “YOU MAY NOT TAKE PHOTOS!” You’re not a celebrity. Banning cameras is ridiculous and seems rather bridezilla-esque. I think if I went to a wedding where they were banned, even though I usually take no pictures during these sorts of things, I’d think “Hm, this bride is a bit of a control freak.”
p.s. Our church did not allow our photographers to be at the altar. So, without a guest’s photo of me and my dad walking down the aisle, I would have had no photos of that walk, and of us having the exact same smile. Food for thought.
Hmm, ok maybe, anyways I’m not getting married in a church, and I wouldn’t be the first bride asking for that.
@Lone Star: There are a lot of places you’re not allowed to take photos. Many stores will not let you take pictures, you can’t take them at the movies, you can’t take them at the theater or the ballet, and you can’t take them at some concerts. It’s not because of anyone thinks that they’re better than anyone else. It’s because flash photography can be distracting and irritating. I don’t think any bride is a ‘zilla for not wanting to be distracted or irritated on her wedding day. Plus, I think her right to have the sort of photos she’s probably going to pay like $4000 for, at her own wedding, trumps a guest’s feelings of entitlement that they should be able to take pics anywhere and everywhere.
I’ve already decided to have an unplugged ceremony, and if anyone brings their camera anyway and ruins any of my key shots, they’ll be receiving a bill. There are no mulligans on a wedding, and there are way too many Uncle Bobs in my family to leave it to chance.
I understand where you are coming from, because I wanted this before our wedding. I didn’t want to tell people they weren’t allowed to do something that really won’t hurt anyone though, so I let it go. I was really pleased with the pictures our friends took, it was interesting to see the wedding from multiple perspectives.
@EffieTrinket: Thanks I really don’t feel like a bridezilla, I have never been called that because I’m not, I mean I’m gonna get married in Vans tennis shoes, in the middle of a forest, I don’t feel like a celebrity or a control freak, I just want to have pretty pics and I don’t want all of my wedding pics to be all around social networks, I don’t know, but I have haters in my life, and I really don’t want them to look at my wedding pics on (like I said before) public wedding albums, and talk about it 
@Lone Star: I’m sorry, I know its your opinion, but this is my opinion too, and honestly I didn’t like the tone you used on your comment towards me, like i was 100% wrong. :/
@Mrs. Pony: I bet that family and friends can take pretty pictures too, and yeah I think in the end I will say the same and let it go, maybe only time will tell!
We didn’t have an unplugged ceremony, I considered it but let it slide at the end and I couldn’t be happier, the next morning I was tagged in over 100pics and they just kept coming!
I had a mostly unplugged ceremony because the chapel actually had a rule about that. Wayfarers is so small that someone holding up their camera could ruin the professional shots taken. The minister informed the congregation for us, and most people followed the rule, except for my uncle, which was a little frustrating, but whatever. I haven’t seen any of his photos though. And his camera didn’t get in the way of our shots very much.
I really appreciate posts on both sides of this & Mrs. Mink I look forward to your post! We’re getting married in a casual building so rules aren’t a problem. I’ve decided to not only allow it, but encourage it. The way I see it, people are going to do it no matter what, so I might as well get to see this pictures! Through a free wedding app from mywedding.com I’m going to encourage people to upload pictures directly to my wedding site through their smartphones. We’ll see how this works
I was just thinking about this, reading Mrs. Coach’s recent post on this topic. I was very close to requesting an unplugged ceremony, but in the end decided against it. I admit I do have a lasting memory of seeing everyone’s iPhones vs. their faces when I came down the aisle. But we were so happy to get photos from some guests right away, and some of the shots captured moments the photographer didn’t (especially because we only had one photographer).
I on the fence about situations like this. I personally bring my camera and phone but silence my phone and only use my camera to take pictures (better quality). I don’t know if there is a way to ask for just photos via a camera.. probably not.. I agree with everyone else though, it is up to the bride and if that is what she wants then have at it, I wouldn’t be offended, I would just be sad that I couldn’t get any personal picturs of the wedding for myself/others.
@EffieTrinket: “I think her right to have the sort of photos she’s probably going to pay like $4000 for, at her own wedding, trumps a guest’s feelings of entitlement that they should be able to take pics anywhere and everywhere.”
THIS!!
Mrs. Otter, Indianapolis, IN Age and Occupation: 22, Freelance Social Media Consultant Fiance's Age and Occupation: 23, CVS Shift Supervisor Engagement Date: November 11, 2011 Wedding Date: April 2013 Venue: Mustard Seed Gardens About Me: I'm a born and raised Hoosier girl, but a diehard Michigan Wolverines fan. I have a tendency to take too many photos and spend full days having TV marathons. Mr. Otter and I met in high school, started dating a couple years later, and moved in after a month of being official. He is easygoing and makes plans on a whim, while I'm color coordinating my planner and organizing everything in sight. He hates glitter, but it's my favorite thing. I have tattoos and he still won't get one, despite my attempts to convince him. We're planning a small, rustic, and (hopefully!) peony-filled wedding to get our married life started. (And yes, there will be glitter involved!)
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