We Don’t Have a Theme

Not an obvious theme, anyway. Like vintage or pink-and-green or chevron. We have no set colours, no year, no anything really. I guess our “theme” is just”¦us.

We did think about a theme, but nothing really stood out. He is a musician and songwriter with a love of things from his childhood like Pokemon and the Nintendo. I work in an office and like crafty, pretty things. I’m not really big on music, and he’s not really big on crafts, so both of those things can’t really make a “theme” without excluding one of us.

What about things we both like? Like tattoos and piercings since we met on a body-modification website? Well, we’re not really that big on all that now, so that seems a bit pointless. And we both like science stuff”¦but not enough that it’s something that represents our relationship. We like vintage-style things but aren’t “vintage” people, so that would also look a bit weird”¦every way we looked at it, we were lost. How could we come up with a theme if we didn’t represent anything as a couple?

Then he said something that made me think. “Well, look at our living room. Nothing in there matches—it doesn’t have a theme. But it”¦works. Everything just goes together well. That’s who we are—we should just go with whatever and trust that it’ll look right because everything else we do works just fine.”

livingr

Our living room for reference—a bit of a mash-up, but it works! (I think.)

So that’s what we’ve done. No theme, no grand scheme, just…whatever we fancy. And so far it’s working well! I wonder if I’ll have a mini freak-out closer to the time when I think “Oh my god, why couldn’t I have had a theme! At least I would have known everything would have matched!”

But for now I’m quite content. I just have a feeling that everything will work out, that I won’t feel pressured to have a specific thing because “it fits the theme,” and I’ll be able to change my mind about things without worrying that it won’t match. That’s the plan, anyway.

Did/do you have a specific wedding theme?

BLOGGER

Mrs. Jackrabbit

Location:
Brighton, UK
Wedding Date:
September 2013
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  1. Member
    graciebee 117 posts, Blushing bee @ 4:11 pm

    Love this :) I think there is a general movement towards less of a “theme” style wedding and I’m glad. It becomes unauthentic and forced. Glad to see your going this route!

    Also I am now obsessed with the KlepperGray series since Mrs. Unicycle posted the Invitation Envy post!! So here is one on “theme”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVDlyRymkF8

  2. Member
    bracelet 1419 posts, Bumble bee @ 4:14 pm

    Don’t sweat the all famed “theme”. We didn’t have one and I we didn’t need one.
    I picked things that worked well together; things that I liked and thought were classic/pretty/useful. I did use the turquoise color of our wedding invite and my dress as a light guideline. Everything wound up looking great.

  3. Member
    mink 2178 posts, Buzzing bee @ 4:32 pm

    I told people who asked that our theme was “wedding.” SMP called it rustic at some point. There was no theme, darn it!

  4. Member
    faeriegirl05 173 posts, Blushing bee @ 5:40 pm

    I remember our cake lady asking us for a theme…I was like we dont really have one. She looked at me like I was crazy. I showed her some of the ideas we liked for cakes and some of the decor ideas. She was like so its a rustic diy with some bling… so I guess thats our theme lol

  5. Member
    sword 1029 posts, Bumble bee @ 5:59 pm

    I’m a theme loving freak as is obvious from my posts! I loved choosing things to go with my theme, but that said, everyone should have the wedding that they love! Your theme is a lack of theme. It works! And your wedding is already beautiful, I love all the details you’ve shared so far.

  6. Member
    sword 1029 posts, Bumble bee @ 6:00 pm

    @faeriegirl05: Haha, yea vendors are the ones who ask about themes the most often!

  7. Member
    ALAin2014 111 posts, Blushing bee @ 6:16 pm

    Ha! It’s funny, people keep asking what the “theme” is… And I have decided that the theme is that we love each other and are getting married. Lol. I mean, it’s a wedding reception… Not a circus, a Broadway show, or a carnival. Hooray for a wedding that is *just* a wedding :)

  8. Member
    FutureMrs.Sunshine 98 posts, Worker bee @ 6:34 pm

    love your coffee table! :)

  9. Member
    soontobeMrsBoo 753 posts, Busy bee @ 6:38 pm

    We ended up with an accidental theme. We started with a vague color scheme–shades of browns/tans–and started picking stuff from there. Somehow we ended up with a lot of tree/wood-looking things. Our invitations have trees punched out of them, the bridesmaids’ gifts are necklaces with open work leaves on them, FI got himself and the dads wooden tie bars in different exotic woods, a couple of other similar things…… All of these were individual, unrelated, decisions–we were just picking things we like and apparently we’re both into wood and trees–but it ends up looking cohesive, and like I spent way more time thinking about this than really did. So, that’s pretty cool I guess. :) You may surprise yourselves!

  10. Member
    mstoadstool 2485 posts, Buzzing bee @ 7:10 pm

    I think not having a theme gives you freedom, you can go here and there and not feel guilty about cheating the theme.
    I found myself “finding my theme” along the way, when I prefered certain things or tried to incorporate certain elements over and over again, and altough it was not “right there” to be considered a theme, it did made everything match ;)

  11. Member
    mstreasure 1655 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:27 pm

    We didn’t have a theme either. We told people our color scheme was “Everything Look Nice.”

  12. Member
    kimy 1164 posts, Bumble bee @ 11:45 pm

    Our theme is “relaxed theme” because I refused to get stressed out about trying to pick a theme lol

  13. Member
    MissFireFlower 1885 posts, Buzzing bee @ 4:50 am

    We were the same way. Our theme is “Our favorite things”. We’re having our ceremony in our favorite park, the reception is in a new banquet hall owned by our favorite local restaurant, our cake is coming from our favorite bakery.

    That being said, everything circled around our color scheme-pink, brown, and ivory. I think everything will look amazing!!

  14. Member
    jackson4407 6 posts, Newbee @ 4:56 am

    dont worry about theme! But im sure your asking this bc your not sure how to “decorate” your wedding..how about a decor/theme for the season you plan on getting married? For example, my wedding will be in spring, so my “theme” is flowers and spring colors. Simple easy, yet so many options! :) good luck!

  15. Member
    junkpicker 91 posts, Worker bee @ 5:13 am

    don’t get intimidated by others

    I wouldn’g worry about anything, just go with what your heart tells you. i always loved the vintage theme, or a Gygpsie theme, that to me means, go with anything at all. Wedding are so overrated that you have to be this or you have to do that or go with that. NA. you do what you can afford and do what your heart tells you.

  16. Member
    mswallaby 2069 posts, Buzzing bee @ 5:45 am

    Pffft, who needs a theme? Our theme was “Have the best time we possibly can!” Our color scheme was “whatever looks nice” – I am not the biggest fan of monochromatic or duochromatic weddings and events. Yay for mix-and-match, anything-goes attitudes – I think it always does come together to look lovely :)

  17. Member
    lovelyduckie 756 posts, Busy bee @ 7:48 am

    I’m not sure I have a theme exactly…maybe shabby chic rustic? Pretty much I liked some rustic stuff and I liked some stuff with fancier vintage details? I didn’t really focus on what my theme is more-so than what I DIDN’T want the theme to be. And that’s a fall theme, just because I’m getting married in September doesn’t mean my whole wedding has to reflect the supposed “fall season”. I put a firm no to all pumpkins, apples, and fall leaves for decor. When I look at my wedding photos I want them to not be overly season based no matter what season I get married in.

  18. Member
    Red Poppy 22 posts, Newbee @ 8:56 am

    I think themed weddings are really fun and cute, but I just didn’t want to commit to anything, so my theme was “wedding” haha. Even colors, I had a pretty broad palette — pinks, purples, champagne, ivory, black — but as long as you choose what you like, it’ll work!

  19. Member
    hyena 2537 posts, Sugar bee @ 9:26 am

    I’m totally jealous of people like you that can just pick pieces you like and it looks designed and intentionally mismatched and charming! When I try things like that, it just looks like a hot mess/garage sale. If your living room looks that good, I’m sure your wedding is going to look just fab.

  20. Member
    dreamhazer 280 posts, Helper bee @ 11:22 am

    We don’t have a theme or even “wedding colors”. Everyone keeps asking, and it’s freaking out the mothers who are worried about their dresses. We just want to have the thing that we like and suit or personalities and our venue. Beyond that — it just dosn’t seem like it’s worthwhile to stress or over-plan. We’re going to enjoy the day no matter what, and we hope in the end the guests’ experience isn’t ruined by there being two shades of brown.

  21. Guest Icon Guest
    SisiL78, Guest @ 11:26 am

    We get asked about our theme all the time. We’ve started to answer “cheap”. I find the whole “theme” idea to be just another way that vendors are trying to make things more expensive. I doubt anyone will have more or less fun if the colors are this or that. OUr “colors” are red, gold, and purple and its not b/c I lurv those colors. The venue is great as a factory turned opera practice facility. And they have lovely red velvet curtains but ugly red/gold chairs. Instead of renting chairs and spending a fortune I’m just going with it. Plus I like purple, and FH looks awesome in it. So we’re going to have purple in our wedding clothes, and probably in our bouquets and in the flowers our moms carry and the boutenierres. No bridal party either. I like my friends too much. Then again if I had limitless funds I would have a carnival theme with circus performers and a huge fancy tent and lots of colorful boughs of flowers everywhere. But, since I don’t want to spend more than 8-10k total I’m going to have to just hope that someday I get invited to a carnival wedding instead :-)

  22. Guest Icon Guest
    Deb, Guest @ 11:44 am

    Love that you’re doing this…we are sort of in the same boat – along w/ nothing in our house really “matching” just that it suits “Us” as it should and in this case suits “you” after all that is what this 1 day in your entire life should be about. :)

  23. Guest Icon Guest
    Mrsspitz913, Guest @ 12:17 pm

    We don’t have a theme either. My wedding is going to be at an aquarium so people are assuming its like this under the sea theme but its not. I’m just going for pretty and maybe like a city sheik feel since its located downtown on the waterfront

  24. Guest Icon Guest
    Julie, Guest @ 1:25 pm

    Theme? We had a wonderful wedding! The theme was GETTING MARRIED! I picked a color for bridesmaids dresses, and they arrived as something else. We had a wonderful, big (225) wedding and it never even occurred to me to have a “theme.” I think people could do better for their big day by thinking more about the MARRIAGE than a theme. :-)

  25. Guest Icon Guest
    Saralynne, Guest @ 2:24 pm

    My son and soon to be lovely DIL are getting married the same day as you :0)

    Anyway, once she found her gown and decided on the color she wanted her bridesmaids to wear and then picked the color for us Moms, everything seems to be falling into place.

    I don’t think they have a “theme” but so far everything they have picked is so lovely. I think their theme if I had to describe it would be romantic, nature and simple elegance.. They aren’t really planning anything crazy or over the top but more of a relaxed elegant feel.

    I ‘m so excited for this wedding-I try not to pepper her with too many questions and drive her nuts, but really they have been so thoughtful about making things comfortable and enjoyable for their guests. I don’t think every wedding needs theme. Your’re young and in love-what could be a better theme than that? :0)

    ~Saralynne

  26. Member
    littlebeanpole 1226 posts, Bumble bee @ 3:00 pm

    Honestly, the first time I heard of a ‘wedding theme’ was watching Four Weddings where they all seem to have some sort of theme! I was under the impression that the theme of a wedding was just ‘wedding’, haha.
    I don’t have a specific colour scheme either.

  27. Member
    ta090607 24 posts, Newbee @ 3:53 pm

    I have a general “theme” of colors but I have also decided to throw in the towel and just choose things I like, regardless if they go with a theme….our theme is us! If we like it, we’ll use it. Thanks for sharing!

  28. Member
    flyingthruthestars 27 posts, Newbee @ 4:12 pm

    I totally agree with you. We didn’t have a theme. As a matter of fact when people asked us what our theme was I replied eclectic. I only required three colors, blue, chocolate brown and cream. I gave pieces of ribbons to everyone who wanted to have something to do for the wedding and told them to match it similar. I asked all bridesmaids and groomsmen not to buy the same outfits because ‘perfect’ scares me. I wanted to showcase our individualities. It worked out just fine and we all had a good time.

  29. Guest Icon Guest
    Maria, Guest @ 4:36 pm

    We don’t have a theme or colors either. Never been much for matchy match things! It sure is hard trying to explain that to parents or guests, especially my grandmother. Everyone wants to know what colors to wear- i say where what you love and feel most comfortable in. We like so many different things and styles within music, art and nature so its a compilation of lots of things- hopefully it will all flow. I like the reference to your living room!

  30. Guest Icon Guest
    Valentine51, Guest @ 5:03 am

    My daughter couldn’t come up with a theme. She wants to use items from her Nanas and her home, things she grew up with. Old books with a tea pot and flowers, tins and jars, great grandmas tea cups and saucers. Says she would go crazy if every table looked the same. I guess our theme is eclectic

  31. Member
    Smart1 25 posts, Newbee @ 10:34 am

    Not having a theme is what we used to call “a wedding”, mostly based on what we could afford.

    Anyway, themes can be as simple as a color combo, which, since you both were into tats, I’m assuming you could select a couple of complimentary colors. It makes it easier for the people you hire & the guests to give/make you things you like…so that THEY are as relaxed as you.

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