We Don’t Have a Theme

Not an obvious theme, anyway. Like vintage or pink-and-green or chevron. We have no set colours, no year, no anything really. I guess our “theme” is just”¦us.

We did think about a theme, but nothing really stood out. He is a musician and songwriter with a love of things from his childhood like Pokemon and the Nintendo. I work in an office and like crafty, pretty things. I’m not really big on music, and he’s not really big on crafts, so both of those things can’t really make a “theme” without excluding one of us.

What about things we both like? Like tattoos and piercings since we met on a body-modification website? Well, we’re not really that big on all that now, so that seems a bit pointless. And we both like science stuff”¦but not enough that it’s something that represents our relationship. We like vintage-style things but aren’t “vintage” people, so that would also look a bit weird”¦every way we looked at it, we were lost. How could we come up with a theme if we didn’t represent anything as a couple?

Then he said something that made me think. “Well, look at our living room. Nothing in there matches—it doesn’t have a theme. But it”¦works. Everything just goes together well. That’s who we are—we should just go with whatever and trust that it’ll look right because everything else we do works just fine.”


Our living room for reference—a bit of a mash-up, but it works! (I think.)

So that’s what we’ve done. No theme, no grand scheme, just…whatever we fancy. And so far it’s working well! I wonder if I’ll have a mini freak-out closer to the time when I think “Oh my god, why couldn’t I have had a theme! At least I would have known everything would have matched!”

But for now I’m quite content. I just have a feeling that everything will work out, that I won’t feel pressured to have a specific thing because “it fits the theme,” and I’ll be able to change my mind about things without worrying that it won’t match. That’s the plan, anyway.

Did/do you have a specific wedding theme?


Mrs. Jackrabbit

Brighton, UK
Wedding Date:
September 2013

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  1. Guest Icon Guest
    SisiL78, Guest @ 11:26 am

    We get asked about our theme all the time. We’ve started to answer “cheap”. I find the whole “theme” idea to be just another way that vendors are trying to make things more expensive. I doubt anyone will have more or less fun if the colors are this or that. OUr “colors” are red, gold, and purple and its not b/c I lurv those colors. The venue is great as a factory turned opera practice facility. And they have lovely red velvet curtains but ugly red/gold chairs. Instead of renting chairs and spending a fortune I’m just going with it. Plus I like purple, and FH looks awesome in it. So we’re going to have purple in our wedding clothes, and probably in our bouquets and in the flowers our moms carry and the boutenierres. No bridal party either. I like my friends too much. Then again if I had limitless funds I would have a carnival theme with circus performers and a huge fancy tent and lots of colorful boughs of flowers everywhere. But, since I don’t want to spend more than 8-10k total I’m going to have to just hope that someday I get invited to a carnival wedding instead :-)

  2. Guest Icon Guest
    Deb, Guest @ 11:44 am

    Love that you’re doing this…we are sort of in the same boat – along w/ nothing in our house really “matching” just that it suits “Us” as it should and in this case suits “you” after all that is what this 1 day in your entire life should be about. :)

  3. Guest Icon Guest
    Mrsspitz913, Guest @ 12:17 pm

    We don’t have a theme either. My wedding is going to be at an aquarium so people are assuming its like this under the sea theme but its not. I’m just going for pretty and maybe like a city sheik feel since its located downtown on the waterfront

  4. Guest Icon Guest
    Julie, Guest @ 1:25 pm

    Theme? We had a wonderful wedding! The theme was GETTING MARRIED! I picked a color for bridesmaids dresses, and they arrived as something else. We had a wonderful, big (225) wedding and it never even occurred to me to have a “theme.” I think people could do better for their big day by thinking more about the MARRIAGE than a theme. :-)

  5. Guest Icon Guest
    Saralynne, Guest @ 2:24 pm

    My son and soon to be lovely DIL are getting married the same day as you :0)

    Anyway, once she found her gown and decided on the color she wanted her bridesmaids to wear and then picked the color for us Moms, everything seems to be falling into place.

    I don’t think they have a “theme” but so far everything they have picked is so lovely. I think their theme if I had to describe it would be romantic, nature and simple elegance.. They aren’t really planning anything crazy or over the top but more of a relaxed elegant feel.

    I ‘m so excited for this wedding-I try not to pepper her with too many questions and drive her nuts, but really they have been so thoughtful about making things comfortable and enjoyable for their guests. I don’t think every wedding needs theme. Your’re young and in love-what could be a better theme than that? :0)


  6. Member
    littlebeanpole 1197 posts, Bumble bee @ 3:00 pm

    Honestly, the first time I heard of a ‘wedding theme’ was watching Four Weddings where they all seem to have some sort of theme! I was under the impression that the theme of a wedding was just ‘wedding’, haha.
    I don’t have a specific colour scheme either.

  7. Member
    ta090607 24 posts, Newbee @ 3:53 pm

    I have a general “theme” of colors but I have also decided to throw in the towel and just choose things I like, regardless if they go with a theme….our theme is us! If we like it, we’ll use it. Thanks for sharing!

  8. Member
    flyingthruthestars 27 posts, Newbee @ 4:12 pm

    I totally agree with you. We didn’t have a theme. As a matter of fact when people asked us what our theme was I replied eclectic. I only required three colors, blue, chocolate brown and cream. I gave pieces of ribbons to everyone who wanted to have something to do for the wedding and told them to match it similar. I asked all bridesmaids and groomsmen not to buy the same outfits because ‘perfect’ scares me. I wanted to showcase our individualities. It worked out just fine and we all had a good time.

  9. Guest Icon Guest
    Maria, Guest @ 4:36 pm

    We don’t have a theme or colors either. Never been much for matchy match things! It sure is hard trying to explain that to parents or guests, especially my grandmother. Everyone wants to know what colors to wear- i say where what you love and feel most comfortable in. We like so many different things and styles within music, art and nature so its a compilation of lots of things- hopefully it will all flow. I like the reference to your living room!

  10. Guest Icon Guest
    Valentine51, Guest @ 5:03 am

    My daughter couldn’t come up with a theme. She wants to use items from her Nanas and her home, things she grew up with. Old books with a tea pot and flowers, tins and jars, great grandmas tea cups and saucers. Says she would go crazy if every table looked the same. I guess our theme is eclectic

  11. Member
    Smart1 25 posts, Newbee @ 10:34 am

    Not having a theme is what we used to call “a wedding”, mostly based on what we could afford.

    Anyway, themes can be as simple as a color combo, which, since you both were into tats, I’m assuming you could select a couple of complimentary colors. It makes it easier for the people you hire & the guests to give/make you things you like…so that THEY are as relaxed as you.

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