Flower girls and ring bearers are adorable. There’s no denying it. Not only do they provide a cuteness factor to the wedding, they also create perfect photo opportunities.
Image via Lover.ly / Photo by John Schnack
Image via Lover.ly / Photo by J. Shipley Photography
Although we love kids, and I even love the look of kids in weddings, having a flower girl or ring bearer was not for us. The wedding participants are entirely family members, with the exception of the officiant, who is a family friend. If any of our siblings had kids, we wouldn’t hesitate to include them. However, Mr. Lemur has just one married brother and neither of us have nieces or nephews. We decided not to include a non-family member in this role and to simply not have a flower girl or ring bearer.
When it comes to kids at the wedding, however, we’re very open. I think the wedding lends itself to being a family affair. Both of us are very family-oriented and are friends with a number of families from our churches and communities. Also, we’re getting married in a simple lodge and a casual setting. It’s a morning wedding with a brunch, which makes it easier for kids to attend than an evening or late wedding.
We indicated kids were invited by including their names on the invitation and we’ve made it clear to families that we know that we’d love to have their kids there on the big day. I know this may cause some problems…kids crying during the ceremony or a less than immaculate reception. That’s OK. If we were getting married in a formal cathedral I might be more uptight about it, but I’m willing to sacrifice some things to have the families we love celebrating with us.
I want to have something for the kids to do while they’re at the wedding, however. It’s not necessarily a long reception, but I have no doubt they’ll get bored. Remember the Scrabble tiles I talked about? I’ve thought about spreading some of them out on the tables, or on one table just for the kids. I’ve also bought crayons and started working on coloring pages for the kids. Maybe something like this?
Image via Disney Stationary
I loved Cinderella when I was a little girl, and I could include some other Disney princess wedding pages for the girls, and maybe something a little more masculine for the boys who don’t want to color Ariel and Belle!
What else could I include to keep the kids occupied? I know a lot of brides have included bags for the kids…what did you put in them? I want to make this fun for them!
Stickers!!
I think the coloring pages sound like a lot of fun! And I’m with the previous poster, stickers would be great too!
I would be really careful with stickers… my almost 4-yr-old loves them, but he also puts them EVERYWHERE. And since kids at a wedding tend to be less supervised than normal, beware of stickers and stuff in general if you have any rentals that need returned. I think covering the kids table in butcher paper and letting them color straight on it (a la Macaroni Grill) would be really fun. Also, boys love Cars and Toy Story if you want to look for more non-princess coloring pages 
Also, BUBBLES!!! Your reception is outside right? Bubbles are fun for kids of all ages
There are so many cute ideas for kids’ packs for the wedding, down to the last detail like re-labeling the crayons! I plan on having some activity pages along with just coloring, probably some kid-friendly snacks, and a puzzle or toy. My nephew loves cars, so he’ll probably get a new matchbox car… maybe I can find one with “just married” on the back of it 
@WoodenShoes: I thought about bubble too, but my coordinator told me that she’s seen many a bride crying after bubbles leave little soap rings on her dress. I’m not sure I’d be that upset about it, but its something to note!
I just don’t think a wedding is as fun without little ones busting moves on the dance floor or oh-ing and ah-ing at the “princess”
I put together bags for the 6 kids we had at our wedding. I included a coloring book with crayons, and I think that was all. The parents were very grateful as it kept the kiddos occupied during dinner.
I’m buying one of those downloadable/customizable activity books from etsy. I’ll just staple them or tie them together with string, throw some crayons on the table, and be done!
@estella & @new york bride 13: Definitely coloring pages, and I like the idea of stickers! I’d probably have to be a little more careful with them, but I like the idea of the next poster with having paper tablecloths… then I wouldn’t have to worry about that
@WoodenShoes: The reception is indoors with an outdoor deck & balcony! If the weather is nice, I definitely want to have something outdoors. I love the idea on the butch paper… I’m already figuring out how I could get this to work!
@Blonde17Jess: I can’t wait till I get all the RSVPs and I know who will be there! I’d love to do some small gifts like personalized crayons and cars.
@MissSpark: Hmm, I don’t think the soap bubbles would be an issue for me. I bought an inexpensive simple dress and I’m anticipating it not being in pristine condition after the wedding. Good things to think about though!
@Mrs. Treasure: I don’t know if I’ll do individual bags or have like a kids table or area. I’m kind of leaning towards the latter. I think doing kids bags would be so fun though
@Amanda: That sounds so fun! I think I’d like to do something like that but a cheaper version of course I should be able to do it myself, right?
It seems like all the kids in our families were entertained either by dancing or with agame systems/smart phones they brought with then
@Mrs. Pony: Oh I hope the kids take pictures! You know how kids love to take pictures with smartphones I want them to do it through the app so I can look at all of them and see the wedding through the kids eyes and laugh!
I think its great you are allowing kids at your wedding. We are having a formal, evening wedding and are still allowing kids at our wedding although it was a family by family decision. We are huge family people so we did not even think twice about inviting our nieces, nephew, and young cousins. Just in our family we have kids aged 2,4, 8,8, 9, and 10. Of course we also have teenage cousins and my oldest niece (one 14, 16, 17 and 18). We didn’t hesitate about inviting them. Then we have family friends with kids.. We invited some (like my mom’s dear work friend whose girls are SUPER sweet and well behaved (10 and 12) but we are not inviting my mom’s friend to bring her rowdy 2 and 3 year old. I hope this doesn’t irritate people. At first, we had set an “age limit” that a child had to be at least 8 to attend. But the 2 and 4 year old are my nephews and I wanted them there so they are the only exception to that rule.
We’re going to have a ton of kids at our wedding and I’ve already given up the dream of a super immaculate ceremony/reception. It’s worth it for the overall vision, you know?
@Brooklyn55: We extended a pretty open invitation, but it definitely depends on the couple and on the family whether or not they choose to bring their kids! I think most will. I already know there will be one or two at least of the more rowdy type there I teach a children’s class at my church and after two years I definitely know what a terror one of them can be! Given the relaxed nature of the wedding, including the ceremony, I think it will be ok for us!
@Miss Palm Tree: That’s what we decided too. Will everything be perfect? Uhh heck no. But it will be a celebration and we’ll end up married
Wow you are much more tolerant than me about kids. The thought of having them at my wedding both terrifies and disgusts me.
Mrs. Castle mentiones she did this “scratch to color” sheets, so the kids could draw without crayons, as she was worried about some making a mess. I think it was a great isea.
Don’t have any specifics, but hit up Target and the dollar spot – they have so many little knick-knacky things there! I look through it WAY too much and they usually have some cute kids stuff that is obviously cheap, and the kids would love it!
Just a thought
Also, seconding the “scratch to color” sheets – those things are so fun! Kids would love them. Try to find a pack of papers so they don’t get upset if they mess up their ONE paper.
I wish we had more kids to invite! If parents will let the kids take pics, I bet you could get kids really into the I Spy picture taking type of activity!
Mrs. Lemur, Greenville, South Carolina Age and Occupation: 22, Graduate Student Fiance's Age and Occupation: 22, Security Officer Engagement Date: October 9, 2012 Wedding Date: May 2013 Venue: Pleasant Ridge Camp & Retreat Center About Me: I may fancy myself a doctor after too many episodes of House—but in reality I'm finally almost done with my degree in business administration (less than three months left!). My fiance and I met at school in undergrad hundreds of miles away from either of our hometowns and have been happily running and hiking together ever since. We're undertaking a long distance relationship as I finish school and we plan our casual wedding for a day after graduation—needless to say, it will be the busiest and most exciting weekend of our lives so far!
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