After heavily weighing the pros and cons of waxing “down there,” I decided to grab Bridesmaid Y and go on a trial run.
Both of us were pretty terrified. Being the pro Googler that I am, I had read TONS of horror stories. Skin getting ripped off? Bacteria? I was hoping that, at the very least, I’d scream here and there and be done with it.
First and foremost: we knew that—despite all information telling us otherwise—we had to find courage in liquid form.
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Image via Mad Mex / Mad Mex’s “Big Azz” margarita: 22 ounces of liquid courage
Seriously, you haven’t lived (and by lived, I essentially mean died a terrible morning-after death) if you haven’t had one of Mad Mex’s legendary margaritas.
Down to the nitty gritty we go, folks.
If anyone ever tells you that it doesn’t hurt, he/she is either a superhero or a liar. Just like the people who say that tattoos don’t hurt (I’m here to tell you: I have three, all of which killed in their own unique ways), people who say Hairy Scary Monster waxing doesn’t hurt deserve to be seriously interrogated. Of course, I cannot speak for everyone—but I can speak for myself.
That. Shit. Hurt.
It’s not the bruise type of hurt and it’s not the “Ow, Charley bit me!” kind of hurt, either.
Video via YouTube / I’d happily give all of my fingers to Charlie in exchange for the pain I experienced. Just saying.
The best way to describe it for me was that it was a searing pain. I mentioned in my previous post that I have sensitive skin. If I run into something (which happens at least 20 times a day), I bruise almost automatically. If my cats scratch me, the mark ends up raised and irritated. If I play with my necklace on my chain, my entire chest ends up blotchy. Needless to say, I was terrified of how it would look—but I didn’t really expect the incredible pain, the blood, and the ridiculous inflammation.
To be fair, that week it was also 85-plus degrees in Pittsburgh (in MARCH, mind you—oh, Western Pennsylvania weather, you trickster *shakes fist*) and our air conditioning was broken. I was stuck with a normally covered body part swollen to the high heavens in sweaty, miserable conditions. Plus I had to go to work (couldn’t exactly call off for the Hairy Scary Monster’s comfort), meaning I was confined in undies and dress slacks during the day. Guess who spread-eagled in front of a fan at night…desperate times, desperate measures, right?
After the swelling went down, though (after about four or so days), the results were incredible. Smooth doesn’t even begin to touch the tip of accuracy regarding the feel and look of it. I still had a few of those bumpies along the bikini line, but the esthetician said she stopped waxing that area because of how my skin was reacting (that would be the immediate redness, blood coming out of my pores, and severe swelling, if you were wondering), so that could very well be why. I’m also sure that the temperature and having to wear, you know, clothes when the HSM was already pretty freakin’ scary in terms of irritation didn’t help the healing and prettiness process.
The absolute smoothness lasted a solid two/two and a half weeks, and then the lightest stubble started. As I’m sure many of you know, this was FAR better results than one gets from simply shaving. Even as it grew (true confessions: the “growing” is the worst part, because the hair has to be at least a quarter of an inch for the wax to actually grab it and remove it effectively), it wasn’t bothersome—thin and fine, as opposed to the normal thick, coarse, and stubborn.
Our esthetician told us that the more you go, the better results you get. In her accented English (Russian? Ukranian? I can’t remember), she told me a story about how one of her hairiest clients with ridiculously sensitive skin (like me, is what she was getting at—she didn’t want me to freak out about the reaction) had been coming to her regularly and “gets one, maybe two hairs” now.
All of this having been said, would I recommend it? Absolutely—but I WHOLEHEARTEDLY recommend doing a trial. Those first few days were some of the most uncomfortable, miserable days ever, and I would have been so beyond bridezilla status if that’s what I had to go through on or close to my wedding day. As with any new routine or a product, you definitely need to do a test run to see how your skin, body, etc. will react. Also, the place we went was incredibly reasonably priced ($50, plus tip), so it was definitely worth it monetarily. We saw quite a few places throughout our research that charged $70 and upward, which would definitely have influenced the “worth it” declaration.
Are there any brides-to-be who tame their HSM on a regular basis? Are you one of the superheroes with an incredible pain tolerance?
This is literally the one thing I have been scared to do, but it sounds like it’s totally worth it! I was a connoisseur of Mad Mex/Big Azz margaritas during my college days at PSU, so maybe I’ll have to get one of those (or 5) before I take the plunge!
I usually get a regular bikini wax right before we head off on summer vacations/any time I will be in a bikini for more than two days straight, but I still don’t like waxes. They hurt! I don’t even have sensitive skin, but it still causes a little bit of bleeding and irritation for a day or so.
I’ve heard taking an aspirin or other painkiller ahead of time helps even more than alcohol? But I always forget to try that.
I have been saying and wanting to do this for.e.ver. Maybe this is my month *fingers crossed* lol
I know an esthetician and have been getting waxed for about 4 years. TMI alert- I have about half the hair i used to, and eventually it doesn’t hurt as much! KEEP DOING IT!
I have been wanting to do this for our wedding/honeymoon, but I had such a bad experience once that I am afraid to try again!
When I’m home (read: with my BFF) in April, I may have to try again…maybe!
I really appreciate your honesty when talking about this. Over the years I’ve made several appointments to get this done and cancelled out of fear of the pain. I know it’s going to hurt like crazy. It’s just crazy the things women do for beauty. My fiance doesn’t have to deal with half the things I’m doing (waxing,eyelash extensions..weight loss etc). The guys really do have it so much easier than we do.
I think I’m still going to go in and attempt a wax about a month before the wedding…with plenty of liquid needed ourage before I go.
Ideal Image!!! I couldn’t be happier. Now, it obviously isn’t the most cost effective way – but 28 $50 waxes would cover the cost I paid – for a lifetime of smooth skin. It hurts as well – and takes about 9-10 treatments weeks apart.
I did it when I went on vacation. I told everyone I rather get another tattoo than do it again. Now I’m considering it for the wedding… as a gift for my future hubby.
Love the “I’d happily give all of my fingers to Charlie in exchange for the pain I experienced.” part 
What was the name of the place you went to? I also live in Pitt and was looking at waxing places. Thanks!
I wax off and on especially during the summers and I highly recommend finding someone who uses hard wax. It is way less painful than the hot wax and strips. Don´t get me wrong, it still hurts, but a lot less!
Did the place you went use hard wax? That makes a world of difference. I go on the regular and while it’s no walk in the park (and the person doing the waxing can make a big difference), I don’t think it’s terrible. It definitely does get better over time!
this post had me in tears and nearly on the floor rolling in laughter! ahahhahahhaha you have a way with words!
I think you have convinced me to never get a wax, although the results do sound much nicer than shaving!
I’m extremely tough skinned when it comes to this stuff. When I was maturing and getting hair on my legs, my mom would wax my legs for me. I’m pretty sure she did it to exact revenge for the terror I was as a toddler. It hurt like hell then, but I’m so used to it now. I get bikini waxes on a regular basis (even going for the sphinx, which is a complete hair removal from everywhere down there) and I see it as no big.
I also have three tattoos, those hurt more. The one on my leg wasn’t a big deal, the one on my shoulder blade felt like I was getting stabbed and the one on my wrist just pinched a little here and there.
Since we’re TMIing, I once got a full Brazilian, and honestly, I was more embarrassed at being spread-eagle on the table in front of a complete stranger than the pain — so I didn’t really notice the pain very much. I need to start considering this for the wedding! Thank you for sharing your experience, Miss Palm Tree!
my friends no longer come to me for reviews on things that have to do with pain, since i enjoy the feeling of tattoos, only feel waxes in one tiny area, and moved up to lasering my “lady”
even my laser nurse is stunned by my lack of pain during the laser procedure. i’m usually done in 20 minutes, and she and the staff are always taken aback, since it usually takes 40ish minutes to factor in breaks and most patients usually need an ice pack afterwards, and i usually sit right up and put my pants back on hahah
that being said, lasering results are AMAZING
@LissaBeans: I definitely think it’s worth trying at least once – absolutely with the aid of the legendary Big Azz’s.
@Mrs. Hyena: Ugh, the things we ladies do. I hate waxes and to say they’re necessary is a stretch, but they’re just so much better, especially in the summer. I’ve also heard that asprin/ibuprofen helps.
@huser2012: Do it, girl! Better to try it ASAP so you can look into other alternatives.
@mnbride13: Ahhhh – I know you’re right and I’ve heard similarly. The long term results are definitely worthwhile.
@new york bride 13: I definitely think you should try again. My advice is to let them know, when you’re booking the appointment, that you have sensitive skin and had a bad experience in the past. They might have ways of making it less harrowing.
@Shortbread: I’m happy to share! When I was considering, all I had to go off of were magazine articles and Google. It would’ve been so nice to have an in-depth, ‘real’ experience to read or discuss. I do think you should try it at least once, with liquid courage and/or a friend if possible, but maybe with enough time before the wedding to do it again or find another option if it doesn’t go so well, like mine? Just a suggestion. Regardless, sending you positive vibes and encouragement! PM me if you have any other questions or anything.
@sschwartz: Previous posters said similarly! I’ve always just dismissed it, but I think I need to reconsider. Like I mentioned before, maybe if a Groupon pops up I’ll take it as a sign. 
@futuremrsguerra: I know this feeling! At least the tattoo pain is only while it’s happening, the waxing pain lasted for a significant amount of time for me. Ugh, good luck if you decide to do it again!
@Ashley: I went to Body Bar! I’ve been to both, the one on McKnight Road and the one in Cranberry. Their staff is beyond professional and both estheticians I’ve worked with have gone out of their way to make me feel comfortable and normal. I highly, highly, HIGHLY recommend both places and their services. Let me know if you have any other questions!
@mjfaris6, @Amanda: Funnily enough, my current esthetician recommended the hard wax as well! When we discussed my sensitive skin and issues, she said that I should specifically mention it when booking the next appointment so that it’s ready. I’m glad you have both had better experiences with it than the regular wax – thank you for sharing!
@notbridey: Thank you!
@Mrs. Pony: haha, oh no! I didn’t mean to dissuade you completely. . .but my experience was semi-traumatizing, Lol. The results are phenomenal, though.
@krislynn_sd: Ahhhh and so we find our differences HOWEVER I do have to tell you, oddly enough, we share tattoo spots. I have one around my ankle, one on my wrist and one on my shoulder blade.
@Miss Airplane: For some reason, that didn’t affect me so much. I mean, I was of course aware of it but I went into it with the “they’ve seen worse than mine” mindset to quell those fears.
@missy: God bless you, girlfriend! Your high tolerance makes being a girl a lot easier, I’m sure! Haha I’m jelly.
I was so terrified about being exposed in front of a stranger, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought. I still get a little shaky when I go in there, but I always take ibuprofen before I go, which I think really does help. And of course, the Big Azz margaritas totally helped!
I’m thinking about trying the new EuroWax Center on McKnight Road, because I think they may have better availability than I’ve noted with Body Bar as far as scheduling, but I did get some BB coupons in the mail.
As always, I’m nervous but excited to get this baby cleaned up for summer!
To those wax-fear-ers… I went a couple of times to get it done professionally and then started doing some waxing at home… a) you kind of get used to it, and b) do yourself a favor and pay for the pros, because it’s quite literally a PAIN in the Hoohah to do it yourself – time-consuming, difficult, and painful! I fully believe everyone should give it a go… if you’re super-modest, ease into it with just the bikini! Miss Palm Tree told me they give you little paper undies to keep you covered, so it’s less traumatizing
^@ BM Y i tried to wax myself at home once, and I ended up on the couch half covered in wax, in tears, unable to tear the cloth strip off (i did fine for the first 5-6 strips, after that i was maxed out on pain!). i made my bf pull it off. haha. probably the least sexy thing ever.
Miss Palm Tree, Pittsburgh, PA Age and Occupation: 23, Lease Analyst Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Associate Systems Analyst Engagement Date: December 22, 2011 Wedding Date: May 2013 Venue: The Fez in Aliquippa, PA About Me: I’m Miss Palm Tree - an opinionated, loyal and outgoing bride-to-be. I currently work as a Lease Analyst by day and a catering assistant by night. Mr. Palm Tree is a Computer Engineer with a love for all things cats. Mr. Palm Tree and I are absolute soul mates. Having grown up across the street from each other (I have the scars to prove it), we have been a part of each other’s lives for almost as long as we can remember. We are far from perfect: we fight, we get annoyed with each other and we certainly take advantage of knowing one another so well when pushed to the edge, but ultimately, what truly defines us as a couple is our love.
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