Two Wheels Become One: Honeymoon!

Our limo dropped us off at the hotel after the wedding, the same hotel where Mr. Unicycle and the guys had taken photos earlier that day. Our room was tricked out with its own kitchen and living room! I later found out that my aunt had called and upgraded us to a suite. She also sent along chocolate-covered strawberries and champagne.

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Photo via Renaissance Schaumburg

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Photo via Renaissance Schaumburg

This is still the coolest hotel I’ve ever been to in my life.

The next morning, we met some of our guests for brunch, and then we spent the afternoon relaxing and opening our gifts. Our honeymoon started the very next day. I don’t think I ever blogged about picking our destination, but that’s because I did very little work for it. I wanted an all-inclusive resort somewhere with sand beaches, ocean, and swimming pools. Since Mr. Unicycle’s mom is a travel agent, the two of them came up with some options, and we ultimately decided on the Palladium Royal Suites Turquesa in Punta Cana.

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All pics by Mr. Unicycle

One of my friends included that flower on our wedding card, so I wore it throughout the honeymoon. When in Rome…

We didn’t get to fly first class because there was no first class on this plane. However, we had some special package where we got priority boarding and food and wine on the flight. Drinking on an airplane is probably the most adult thing I’ve ever done.

When we got there, we explored the resort and Mr. Unicycle took photos of everything.

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Our room was amazing and huge as ballz. We had a canopy bed, which I’ve always wanted, and it was big enough to fit like 10 people. It was like the giant bed from A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. The toilet room and shower were both separate, and both had windows in the doors for some reason. I guess when you’re on your honeymoon you should really be getting to know each other? I made Mr. Unicycle go out on the balcony when I used the bathroom. Oh, we had our own balcony too.

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The balcony came with its own hot tub! We were totally ballers on this trip. And here’s the view from our balcony:

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We spent pretty much the entire week lounging on the beach, reading trashy books, and drinking frozen drinks. One of the Apple Vacations representatives informed us that pina coladas can be laxatives, but not before I had downed at least three of them. Luckily, she was wrong…or was she?

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At night there was live music and stage shows at different hotels in the resort. We sipped wine while listening to jazz one night, and we went to a show that was literally called “Michael Jackson Show,” where a guy dressed like Michael Jackson and danced to his music. The announcer kept reminding us of the name of the show by yelling out “Michael…Jackson…SHOWWWWW!!” intermittently. The resort was gorgeous at night

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Yes, that’s a swim-up bar. And yes, I swam up to it and ordered drinks. You’d be surprised how hard it is to sit on a bar stool that’s submerged in water.

Mr. Unicycle has a “nice” camera, meaning it’s not a point and shoot or a cell phone. I figured I’d leave it up to him to take all the photos on our trip, but then he didn’t want to bring it to the beach or the pool because he didn’t want it to get stolen while we were swimming, which is a legitimate concern. So most of the photos we got are of the scenery and not actually of us doing things. My advice to you is to bring a less good camera on your honeymoon so you can still get the snapshots you want. The photos Mr. Unicycle took are beautiful, but they’re not really honeymoon memories.

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We did take the camera to the beach one day, but then we went back to our hotel to stash it again before going back to swim. All in the name of blogging…

Also I loved my new suit so much. Also now you know what we look like without makeup.

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This one was also posed. I told him to pretend like he was lounging there with his drink, but we were really in the middle of taking a walk.

We did go on two excursions. The first one was to an alleged “cigar factory,” but to me it looked more like a room where a handful of people were rolling cigars. We exited through the gift shop and left with bags of pointless souvenirs.

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The other excursion was a catamaran ride with snorkeling for the first half and partying for the second half. When the snorkeling was done, they cranked up the music, taught everyone dance moves, served us Coco Locos, and then set us free to swim in the ocean for a while. They even floated rum and cokes out to us on floating trays. It was probably my favorite part of the trip, except we didn’t bring our camera with us. The only photo we have is the souvenir photo we took while snorkeling, which cost us like $20.

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This is a photo of that photo. Also, that stingray had a face.

One night we drank some of the Dominican rum that came with our room, smoked a Cuban we bought at the cigar factory, and soaked in the hot tub. I wish it were my honeymoon every day. In case you’re curious, Mr. Unicycle says the Cuban was nothing special. He knows more about cigars than I do. We shared one and couldn’t even finish it, hahaha.

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He set up this artsy shot.

On the last night, there was a special dinner for all of the honeymooning couples at the resort. They served a friggin’ amazing dinner with wedding cake for desert, and there was a mariachi band that serenaded each table.

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By the end of the week, we were both getting bored and ready to come home. If I were to do another all-inclusive trip, I’d probably want to cap it at four days, because there’s only so much beach lounging I can put up with. Nevertheless, it was just the relaxing honeymoon I needed after being such a crazed bridezilla. And I didn’t even get sunburned!

Do you prefer active trips or relaxing vacations?

BLOGGER

Mrs. Unicycle

Location:
Chicago, IL
Wedding Date:
June 2012
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  1. Member
    genie 723 posts, Busy bee @ 11:09 am

    We also had a pretty nice camera and didn’t take too many shots of us doing things, but Mr. Genie took pictures of every friggin plant he came across. So, yeah, I get the picture situation. But it’s kind of nice that it just lives in a love-drunk memory, or an actual-drunk memory. Lots of daiquiris were consumed.

  2. Member
    This Time Round 10219 posts, Sugar Beekeeper @ 6:17 pm

    FABULOUS blog post… thanks for sharing so much of your Honeymoon with “the Hive” (as a Travel-Nut I have to be honest and hope you have more photos to share)

    Mr TTR & I get a little stir-crazy when we are a Resort / AI… we don’t do “sitting still” very well… we need to go off and do exploring and adventures on our own (found DR wasn’t a great country to do that in… not as safe as other places we’ve visited… so we won’t be back).

    Our perfect vacation seems to be one that offers up a combo of things… so we enjoy things like road-trips & cruises, as long as we get some time to both explore and relax. (Can’t beat a cruise for pampering… lol, plus you unpack once, and a “new world” filled with untold adventures comes to you every morning).

    As for cameras… we have a nice Fujifilm that we use for our adventures… it isn’t as fancy as some of the high-end DSLR cameras… but it is more than just a basic point & shoot camera (and miles beyond the cell-phone option).

    We are looking however to add a Go-Pro Camera to our mix… (after seeing another couple with one on our Honeymoon Cruise). A Go-Pro can literally “go anywhere” and takes both still pics & video. Nice that it is waterproof… so you can take it snorkeling (great underwater shots)… and when at the beach for a swim… just wear it into the water… thereby leaving your towel, lotion etc in your beach-bag. No worries then.

  3. Member
    Red Poppy 18 posts, Newbee @ 12:32 pm

    This looks like the perfect, relaxing honeymoon! And your writing totally cracks me up, hahaha. My honeymoon was nice but didn’t really live up to the high expectations.

  4. Member
    love108 3979 posts, Honey bee @ 3:02 pm

    What did they call that type of room? I hate how you can’t really tell what each “level” of room looks like, and what’s worth the money!

  5. Member
    unicycle 476 posts, Helper bee @ 6:24 am

    @love108: I think it was called the Honeymoon Suite, but I’m not positive

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