Better with a Beard?

With the wedding day quickly approaching, Mr. Plane and I have been giving a lot of though to our appearances. I would not say we are vain people, but we will have these photographs for the rest of our lives, so it should be no surprise that we want to look our best.

In addition to some crazy crash dieting, tanning, teeth whitening, and weighing the pros and cons of wedding-day Spanx, the Airplanes are also very carefully considering the presence of facial hair at our wedding. And no, not on the bride.

Last year, Mr. Plane went on his annual deer hunting trip and came back with quite a bit of scruff on his normally clean-shaven face. For no reason other than to see what would happen, he decided not to shave for a few days after that. Days turned into weeks, which turned into months, and now I can barely remember that baby-faced boy I met in college. Luckily, that’s what photos are for.

Here is Mr. Plane in one of our engagement photos, sans beard:


Photo by our awesome photographer Meghan at studiOsnap

And rockin’ the clean shave on Memorial Day, 2011:


Personal photo

Now for a couple with the beard, both taken this summer.

The Airplanes at a friend’s wedding in June:


Personal photo

And Mr. Plane on a fishing trip for his bachelor party in July (please excuse the fish head):


Personal photo

It was only within the last week that Mr. Plane started to question whether or not he would be wearing his beard for the wedding. Actually, I was kind of shocked he was even considering not having a beard for the wedding—at this point, it has existed through the better part of our engagement. It would almost feel wrong not to include it in the wedding as well!

Am I personifying the beard too much?

I am also fully aware that Mr. Plane might not even qualify to call his facial hair a beard by certain standards—maybe you feel more comfortable with the term “chin strap,” although that one has never sat well with me. It is definitely not on par with some epic beards of our generation, specifically the folks of Duck Dynasty fame”¦


Oh wait, that’s the Airplanes as Duck Dynasty for Halloween last year! / Personal photo

Regardless of what you call it, I like a little scruff on my man, and I do hope he keeps it for the wedding day. But I told him that I want him to feel his best, whatever he decides that looks like. And if he shows up in that Halloween beard”¦so be it! You (and I!) will both just have to wait until the wedding day to see what he chooses.

Does your man have an epic (or not so epic) beard? Did he consider shaving before the wedding?


Mrs. Airplane

Plymouth, Michigan
Wedding Date:
September 2013
Post-a-Thon on Thursday, September 26th!
Arm in Arm: The Details

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  1. Member
    smg5281 612 posts, Busy bee @ 12:30 pm

    We are having this exact same dilemma! My FI never goes clean shaven but he wants to for the wedding because he thinks it’s more formal. I left it up to him! We’ll see!

  2. Member
    Overjoyed 2482 posts, Buzzing bee @ 12:30 pm

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the beard. It’s just that I don’t think it’s necessarily an improvement over the baby face. So if he were going to choose to wear the beard, I’d think he’d be doing so because he likes it better, not because it looks better.

  3. Member
    alliefly 207 posts, Helper bee @ 12:37 pm

    My DH had a little scruff on our wedding day because I love it :)

  4. Member
    xskittles 116 posts, Blushing bee @ 12:38 pm

    I am pro-beard! :)

    My FI has been rockin a beard since 11th grade. The few times he has shaved he just looks….weird.

    My grandma has made comments that he hopes he “cleans up” and gets rid of it for the wedding, but that will absolutly not happen. He just wouldn’t be himself!

  5. Guest Icon Guest
    Lone Star, Guest @ 1:17 pm

    I will say, unless it is a fully grown and trimmed beard, a lot of “beards” look quite scruffy in photos and like the groom just forgot to shave. Considering the fact wedding photos last a lifetime, that’s food for thought.

  6. mswallaby Member
    mswallaby 2070 posts, Buzzing bee @ 1:30 pm

    Hahaha I don’t think this even occurred to us! But Mr. W has generally 2 looks – clean shaven, and 5 o’clock shadow (my faaaave). He is required to shave regularly for work (it’s a safety issue since he sometimes wears respirators) so I haven’t had the opportunity to see a good beard or facial hair on him. I’d say your FI should wear whatever is most comfortable to him! I think clean-shaven is a classic look but if he’s more comfortable with a beard, then by all means!

  7. Member
    mrs_pudding_pop 2571 posts, Sugar bee @ 1:37 pm

    I have specifically requested a bit of scruff for our wedding!

  8. Member
    daniellekira 573 posts, Busy bee @ 1:45 pm

    Haha, I love the Duck Dynasty beard. You fiance looks great with a “beard”. Can’t wait to see what he decided.

  9. Member
    eichanist 13 posts, Newbee @ 4:56 pm

    I think your mister looks great with a beard!! :) And I totally get personifying it. My fiancé has been sporting his since we started dating and I really want him to keep it for the wedding. It’s a part of our relationship! Even our cake topper has him bearded!!

  10. Member
    missamysmiles 802 posts, Busy bee @ 6:25 pm

    I met my SO with a beard… and he rocks it. Big time. We get stopped EVERYWHERE with people commenting on how amazing his beard is.

    We know when we get engaged everyone will be asking him if he’ll shave it. The answer is HELL TO THE NO.

    I have drilled it into his head that if he shaves randomly one day I will cry. Literally.

    The people that have known him pre-beard are very divided though, many people hate the beard and constantly ask when he’ll shave it.

    I would be game for him trimming it much shorter, but he needs to have the beard.

    I hope your guy makes the decision for himself! He looks great with both!

  11. Member
    Miss_Mimosa 190 posts, Blushing bee @ 8:18 pm

    This post made me laugh! My boyfriend also has an on again off again beard. Whatever will make him comfortable when we do decide to get married will be fine by me I suppose! I want him to think and feel like he looks his best on his big day too! I think your mister looks good both ways!

  12. jetsetter Member
    jetsetter 535 posts, Busy bee @ 4:58 am

    There is no question that Mr. Jet will be rocking a full beard the day of our wedding. Whenever he messes up a trim and shaves it all off, I feel like I’m cheating on him with some baby-faced creep!! 😀

    I’m a sucker for some cute facial hair so I say go for it, Mr. Plane!

  13. Member
    jessc4343 219 posts, Helper bee @ 10:13 am

    Also struggling with this. I think with the vibe of our wedding FI could definitely get away with not-usual scruff; if I had to choose for him, I’d er to the side of facial hair. We’re also pretty excited to see what he decides to do, though…

  14. bracelet Member
    Mrs. Bracelet 279 posts, Helper bee @ 12:42 pm

    I’d like to say that Mr. B “compensates” for the lack of top hair with a beard, but honestly it helps add character to his face. Sometimes he shaves it off (especially when he had a beard-shaving-mishap) to start afresh.

  15. Guest Icon Guest
    Miss Cocktail, Guest @ 1:38 pm

    I met my fiance when he had a very short bears, barely over a scruff. I’ve been carefully and subtly encouraging his beard growth for over 2 years. It is now a magnificent display of facial hair that leaves hipsters jealously gaping in its wake. And still people ask me if he’s going to shave for the wedding.

    Over my dead body.

  16. Member
    sheltervet 126 posts, Blushing bee @ 1:40 pm

    I think the best advice is to have the guy determine whether he expects the facial hair to be a long-term thing. Like, does he foresee having facial hair for a huge part of his life? If yes, keep the facial hair for the wedding – if not, shave it off.

    My father shaved his facial hair off for his wedding and I cannot recognize him in the photos since I have NEVER in my entire life seen him without facial hair. Just some food for thought…

  17. Member
    lilypereiraacosta 17 posts, Newbee @ 1:43 pm

    How do you like him better? I love my FI with beard, so qhy dont you tell him. How you think he looks better? I bet you want him to love your look too

  18. Guest Icon Guest
    MissBunny, Guest @ 4:42 pm

    Hilarious! We had a similar hairy situation. The result? my FI and 4 groomsman made a day of it and went in as a group to an old fashioned barbershop! They really enjoyed the experience and all looked AMAZING in the photos (no nicks, red spots, etc.). Be warned though —if he hasn’t shaved in a while (ahem, months), then be sure to save a week or so ahead and then before the wedding. Don’t want too much redness or stark white from lack of sunshine! Trust me….we learned this at my brother’s wedding last year.

  19. Member
    Merlin29 130 posts, Blushing bee @ 5:45 pm

    My man has grown a beard over the last 5 months and is shaving it on 1-1-14 for our wedding on 5-31-14 as I do not want any uneven tanning! It is the thickest beard anyone we know has ever seen!

  20. Member
    Peather2013 47 posts, Newbee @ 5:37 am

    My fiance, woops, husband now! Did what’s called a “yeard” a year long stretch without shaving, causing an absolutely amazing beard to grow along with a great mustache. When he got to the year, he trimmed it up which was his soon to be “beard-style” for the wedding day. I LOVE BEARDS. So, I had no issue what so ever with him having his beard how he wanted on the wedding day. I saw it as if he was getting his “hair” done, but instead, he got his beard done! Every kept asking if he was going to shave it off for the wedding, I told them, interjected on every conversation about it, that heck no he wasn’t! If he would have wanted to, then so be it but I wanted the beard!

    I think that we need to look at the groom as if he’s a bride as well. It’s not just your day, it’s his as well and he should feel like he makes choices as well! :)

    I wish I could post a picture of his epic beard! He gets soooo many compliments on it. Even had a man quote Shakespeare to him about it. Talk about a funny moment in Chicago!

  21. Member
    lovecacti 220 posts, Helper bee @ 7:44 am

    My fiance has had a beard for so long that it feels like I’m cheating on him with another man when he shaves it. I really hope he wears a beard for our wedding day, but I leave that up to him.

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