In thinking about our wedding day, it was always a given that I would have a bridal party. A lot of couples nowadays opt out of it, due to hassle and the drama that it brings. But I definitely wanted my best and dearest friends to stand up with me at the church and make sure that the party keeps popping at the reception. (Side bar: Sphinx keeps making fun of me for using the word “popping” to describe our reception…I must make sure to point this out to him when the party is, in fact, popping that night.) And who doesn’t want to play photo shoot with their girls during the day?
But what kind of bride would I be if I just ASK them to be my bridesmaids? Kidding, but there are too many cute ways to go about this, and with some bridesmaids out of town, I wanted to be able to mail something along.
Ring Pop box / Source: PrestonEventPlanning on Etsy
Personalized Bottles of Wine / Source: Idoartsyweddings on Etsy
While I thought these options were cute, the ring pop didn’t feel quite right, and while wine is usually the right answer to most questions, in this case it might have been a little pricey, as I wanted to keep postage down on the ones I had to ship.
“Will you be my Bridesmaid?” boxes / Source: Wedding Chicks
And I LOVE the “Be my maid?” boxes from Wedding Chicks with all the detailed info about the dresses, the timeline, the venue, and anything else they would have wanted to know with inspiration pictures and color swatches. That’s totally a “me” thing to prepare for the girls—all the info in one place!
Well that all sounds great, but at the time I just didn’t know all those details. I wanted to ask all the girls by the beginning of March. I was coming to the end of my gown shopping around then and wanted them to the come to the salon with me when I chose the dress—and I wanted them to be legitimate bridesmaids when we did that. But at this point, I didn’t have hotel rooms or a day-of timeline. I didn’t have the dress color or style decided on, because I wanted the girls to help pick that. And during this time period, TWO of my girls got engaged, several were moving, a few looking for new jobs—I needed to ask them so that I could get up in their busy lives! So with a lack of wedding details to supply, I decided to print simple, pretty cards with very heartfelt notes inside.
I learned that executing a very cute way to ask takes some time, and that’s only after you’ve got some decisions down like date, location, who to ask (you know, those small things?). I had put the bridesmaids topic on top secret lock down between pretty much me, Momma Pyramid, and Sphinx very soon after getting engaged. I wanted to make sure that I was asking all the right people, not offending anyone, taking into account aforementioned life events, and trying to plan one of the perfect ways to ask them. I didn’t even want to slip and tell his sister or my sister that they were in the party, because I didn’t want to ruin my surprise. OK, so it probably wasn’t really a surprise to them, but if it’s important to you to ask your party early and in a creative way, then jump on this quickly! People get anxious!
It did get a little awkward…I was discussing wedding stuff with BM TPerk several times a week, and she graciously didn’t ask about the bridal party for a while. One day she did, very offhandedly: “Oh, so what’s next, you guys need to pick a bridal party, right? How many people are you thinking?”
My genius, smooth response was something like, “I don’t know, why don’t you just stop asking questions, OK??” Hopefully she got the hint. And she got her card a week later.
Maybe everyone isn’t as worried about the “surprise” element of this as I was, but I’m glad that I waited until I had a few details secured and had the time to set aside for their cards and to ask them in a special way.
Did you have any antsy bridesmaids? How long did you wait to ask them?