On the Weight Game”¦

Hive, it’s time to get a little bit serious”¦

I’m a small girl, height-wise. I’m sure I’ve mentioned it before, but I’m only 5’0”³. My fiancé towers over me at 6’0”³. He loves how short I am (and generally just”¦loves me <3 ). I quite like my height, having gotten used to it over the years. Although being short can be a little bit annoying when you’re trying to watch a concert (“Oh look, all I see is”¦the head of the taller person in front of me”¦”), it’s been pretty good being short.

Unfortunately, I’m short and quite big (read: fat”¦I’m not going to pull my punches here). The thinnest I’ve been was during my karate days, and because those were the days of “DON’T YOU DARE TAKE A PICTURE OF ME WITH THAT CAMERA,” I don’t have any photos of me when I was that thin. I do have some photos of me during a thinner stage of my life, but as I was overly conscious about my body size, most of them have me SWATHED in big jumpers and two-sizes-too-big pants.

Yeah”¦I wasn’t very happy with my fashion choices back then.

Anyway, I’ve struggled with my weight over the years, and being Asian, the idea is that you need to be THIN to be beautiful. I’m not talking Jennifer-Lawrence-healthy thin, nor am I talking J.Lo/Beyoncé-curves thin. I’m talking wow-you-look-like-a-Popsicle-stick thin.

An example of typical Asian fashion and thin-ness. I guarantee that if you go to Hong Kong or any other Asian country, the size “Large” will actually be a size “Small” in Anglo sizing. / Image via We Heart It

But you see, I’m not “typically Asian sized.” Yes, I am short, but I have curves. My body size is basically petite, short, and curvy. I love that I have curves, I love that my natural body size is petite, but unfortunately, 99.99999% of my family does not.

I’ve been pestered to lose weight by so many relatives. For example, one of my uncles told me to eat cabbage soup for a month because his daughter did it and lost so much weight (I didn’t—I just stared at him like he was crazy). Another example: At a party a family friend stared at me ashamedly as I plucked up a piece of cake. He shook his head and was visibly offended that I was eating a piece of cake.

Well, buddy, you weren’t so thin yourself.

Now that I’m engaged, one of the first port-of-calls from a number of people when talking to me about the wedding has been, “Are you going to lose some weight?” Though it annoyed me, they had a point. Ever since I started dating Mr. Big, I had gained a lot of weight and I was at my heaviest. I hated my body, felt like crap, and wanted to lose weight. Unfortunately, I found it hard to motivate myself on my own and basically stayed at that weight for the first six months of our engagement.

On the Milford Track, c. January 2013. God that track was a bitch to walk”¦ / Personal photo

Finally, the year 2013 struck and I was determined to do some weight loss.

Mr. Big also wanted to lose some weight and we started a regime. It first involved lots and lots of walks, which were fun, but as time wore on, the weight loss (for me, anyway) stopped. So we had to switch it up. We searched for a gym and found a reasonably priced one. A gym membership later, we were doing cardio work for the majority of it. However, our gym was AWESOME and gave us a free gym program. After two months, I’d lost about eight kilograms.

And it kept decreasing.

The evolution of a big Miss Big to a littler Miss Big. From left to right, top row: At Marlborough, New Zealand, visiting the wineries, c. January 2013; in front of the Wentworth Falls (or a section of it), c. March 2013; posing in our Steampunk duds for GM Cthulu’s wedding reception, c. June 2013. Bottom Row: posing in the Christchurch Cathedral Square, New Zealand, c. July 2013; drinking a delicious Cabrito coffee at Circular Quay just before a trip to Melbourne, c. August 2013; making a stupid face at Mama Bighorn’s birthday dinner in Cocklebay Wharf, Darling Harbour, c. November 2013.

I don’t think I’m going to get to my primary weight goal, but hopefully I’ll get to my secondary weight goal.

And no, I don’t intend to get Popsicle thin! That just wouldn’t suit my body type.

As for Mr. Big, he’s lost a whopping 20 kilograms since we started this venture. He looks significantly different to what he did in the beginning of the year. Let me show you a three-picture-progression:

The evolution of a big Mr. Big to a smaller Mr. Big. From left to right: Mr. Big in front of the Auckland Museum, c. January 2013; Mr. Big and me during our engagement photo shoot, photography by Studio Something; Mr. Big, looking cute, at my Mama Bighorn’s birthday dinner, c. November 2013.

We hope to continue losing weight after the wedding is done and dusted through both regular exercise and just eating the right foods. We’re happy with our progress so far, and we’re looking forward to more progress in the future!

Did anyone else struggle with weight before the wedding? Who else has used their wedding as a catalyst to lead a better lifestyle?

(All images personal unless otherwise stated)

BLOGGER

Mrs. Bighorn Sheep

Location:
Sydney, NSW, Australia
Wedding Date:
February 2014
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comments

  1. Member
    MrsSaltWaterTaffy 23899 posts, Honey Beekeeper @ 8:23 am

    You look beautiful at any weight. Being healthy is the most important part, who cares about what society says!

  2. Member
    lealorali 4413 posts, Honey bee @ 9:15 am

    Congratulations! Losing weight is so difficult. I bet you worked so hard. You look fabulous and I think you have a great perspective.

  3. Member
    Mrs. Bracelet 1411 posts, Bumble bee @ 10:27 am

    Wow, you can really see how much effort you and Mr. BigS have put into getting fitter. Way to go!

  4. Member
    Cluelessbride10 198 posts, Blushing bee @ 11:35 am

    Congrats! Losing that amount of weight is an achievement in itself. :) I love your attitude as well. As long as you feel good, it is all what matters.

  5. Member
    miss-circe 2968 posts, Sugar bee @ 7:58 pm

    Good on you guys for your joint decision to get fitter and healthier. I’m going to echo MrsSaltWaterTaffy’s sentiment that frankly you look beautiful at any weight but what matters most are being healthy and being happy/comfortable in your own skin.

    Being a fellow short (I’m 5’3) and curvy (translation: fat :P ) Asian bride myself, I can unfortunately emphatize with your anecdotes about family pressure to lose weight. Every time I visit the Philippines, multiple aunts and uncles bluntly tell me how I’d look so much better if I was thin. They don’t perceive it as being rude or harsh. Luckily, I’ve figured out a way to deal with them because I’m frankly sick of it :D

    The next time we go back and one of them offers their unsolicited opinion, I plan on smiling and pointing to my chest and unashamedly saying, “Yes, I may not be thin but at least I have a pair of large and magnificent breasts.” If you’re going to make me uncomforable, I’m going to make you VERY uncomfortable. My mother knows I would actually do this and so she’s planning on running interference between myself and any critical relatives :D

    Anyway, I wish you and Mr. Big the best with your respective progresses :) I’m taking advantage of my free gym access at work to get fit before the wedding. I know I’ll never be “Asian small” again but that’s ok with me – I just want to learn to love my body.

  6. Member
    Mrs. Bighorn Sheep 114 posts, Blushing bee @ 9:05 pm

    @MrsSaltWaterTaffy: Thank you! <3 :) And yes, being healthy is really all that matters. I'm pretty darn healthy now, even if a little chubby, so I'm perfectly happy with where I'm at right now :)

    @lealorali, @Mrs. Bracelet, @Cluelessbride10: Thanks so much guys! Mr Big and I definitely put a lot of effort into it and I’m happy to say we’re both at a comfortable weight for the wedding :)

    @Miss Circe: You win the Internet. Seriously, girl, that’s a fabulous comeback and I think I might just use it next time I’m overseas and get an unsolicited opinion. :D I have large magnificent breasts myself. I totes agree though – you should love your body. Screw being “Asian small” – I have magnificent curves and I’m going to take full advantage of them. ;)

  7. Member
    miss-circe 2968 posts, Sugar bee @ 11:59 pm

    @Miss Bighorn Sheep: Hooray for curves and large magnificent breasts!! Our men love them on us and that’s what really matters ;) Lol thank you and definitely feel free to use it if you need to :D And yay you for doing the Milford Track – tramping/hiking and I never got on well.

    By the way, I’m glad you didn’t do the cabbage soup diet because it can cause A LOT of gas :S

  8. Member
    luxelady 62 posts, Worker bee @ 5:40 am

    Asian bride as well! I’m glad you two have committed to getting healthier, that’s the most important (not looks! Or being twig thin.)

  9. Guest
    Kara, Guest @ 8:55 am

    I loved this story! You really speak to me as I am also Asian (partially) and feel the pressure to be “thin,” but like you, my body type just isn’t suited for a Popsicle size. So, it’s really encouraging to me to see a fellow curvy girl kick butt and look great without having to fall into the Asian “norm.” :) My main squeeze and I are determined this 2014 to hit the gym hard and knock off pounds before we our day! I’m bookmarking this story to remind me of the success out there and that I can have my own!

  10. Guest
    Katie M, Guest @ 9:43 am

    I started a journey towards getting healthy last February. I had spent the past 3 years easily creeping upward in my weight and then I met my now-fiance and gained another 15 happy pounds, but it was making me miserable.

    Carrying all that extra weight around was hurting me emotionally and physically. Plus, my habits were getting worse and worse and I was getting really depressed. So I intervened and started a workout regimen and started tracking what I eat. I’ve done pretty well so far. I’m not anywhere near my goal, but I’m steadily slimming down.

    My main fear is that people are going to attribute my weight loss and exercise to getting married when this is a journey I started over 7 months before we were engaged and something I plan on continuing for the rest of my life. In the process, my now-fiance started tracking his intake and exercising as well. So we support and challenge each other to our goals. It’s awesome regaining health together.

  11. Member
    June14Bride 102 posts, Blushing bee @ 9:58 am

    Congrats on your achievement. I have a similar experience. I’m Asian, but I’m 5’7″. So when you’re a tall AND heavy Asian, that’s a double whammy. Earlier this year, I went to get my physical at my new primary physician’s office. She’s Korean…and I kid you not, but after she weighed me and did her thing…she said, “I know you said you travel a lot for work, but hotels do have gyms! You would be normal if you were Caucasian, but you’re really overweight for an Asian woman.” I might as well have turned the other cheek and have her tell me my grades back in college weren’t good enough either.

    Anyways, that experience, along with trying on wedding dresses was a huge wake up call for me. I mean, I always knew I wasn’t built like an average Asian woman…I’m so bottom-heavy/pear-shaped that it’s embarrassing. I’ve been hitting the gym more often and have been really careful with what I eat (I’m a huge foodie, sadly). Keep up the good/hard work. I know it’s not easy!

  12. Member
    mascott25 93 posts, Worker bee @ 7:00 pm

    You both look great. Congratulations.

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