I’m going to take a quick break from the wedding-planning posts before I go any further, because I have a little confession to make. I think it is best to just get it out and over with now so that things make sense later on. But this is long and not very pretty picture-wise, so I promise I won’t be offended at all if you just skip over it and wait for the wedding stuff!
So, confession: I was engaged before, once, to my college boyfriend. We were engaged for 11 months, and I met Mr. Milk Cow a little under four months after my ex-fiance ended our relationship. We were planning on a long engagement, but had started doing some early research—we basically had our photographer, our DJ, and our venue picked out. So I’m no stranger to planning weddings!
Hillendale Country Club was our top choice—it is gorgeous in the fall. / Image by Jackson Photography
While we were planning, almost every decision I made was based on what someone else wanted—the wedding my parents expected, the huge bridal party my ex wanted, and the long guest list everyone but me thought was in the budget.
Nothing against huge bridal parties, of course…I just don’t have that many close friends! / Photo by Kelly Maughan Photography
Now, a few years out from that relationship, my life is completely different. The girl I was when I was with my ex is completely gone. Right after our breakup, I went through some big changes and figured out what I truly wanted out of life. I lost some friends along the way and changed jobs twice. Most importantly, I really know who I am and what I want now. All of this plays into planning for our wedding and our marriage so much.
Going through the experience of being engaged and having all these life plans and then watching them disappear has made me appreciate everything in my life so much more, but especially my relationship with Mr. Milk Cow. He is the perfect partner to the person I am today, and I am confident that we will keep growing and changing and figuring out how to keep connecting with each other. I can’t imagine marrying anyone but him.
Maybe it’s because I can’t imagine anyone else having the patience (and long enough arms) to handle the selfies I am constantly wanting to take? / Photo is personal.
My appreciation of Mr. Milk Cow and our relationship is very clear to me in our wedding planning. I still listen to others’ opinions, but at the end of the day, we make our decisions together—just the two of us. We want a day that reflects who we are and our relationship, and no one else can decide that like we can. Our guest list will be a mix of close family and friends because I want people there who will celebrate with us on our wedding day, and then hopefully still be there to support us when times get rough a year or 10 years down the road.
I am constantly aware of what our wedding day will be—a time to celebrate our relationship, our commitment to each other, and the joy we have found and created in one another. But it isn’t the most important thing, so I’m trying my best to not let the planning of one day take over my life too much. Because at the end of that one day, Mr. Milk Cow will be by my side whether all the details are perfect or not.
Pure happiness! / Photo by Marlayna Photography
But let’s be serious—wouldn’t it be nice to get married to my best friend on a day when all the details I’ve spent months planning fall perfectly into place?! A girl can dream!
Have you been engaged or married before? What did you learn from before that you’re using in your current relationship?
- Columbia, MD
- Human Resources Analyst
- Wedding Date:
- July 2014
- The Meeting House/DoubleTree by Hilton