Bamboo for Two: Reflections on the Day

So now that everything is said and done, I, like Mrs. Camel, wanted to reflect back on our wedding.

It was an absolutely beautiful day, and I’m so glad we got an opportunity to share that day with all of our friends and family (and you guys!). Though we as brides spend so much time worrying about the little details—what shade of blue, what kind of centerpieces, etc., etc.—in the end, on the day of, none of those things mattered to me.

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Photo by Lisa Rigby Photography

Nothing meant more to me than to be there with PBear, and see our friends and family come to support us. I don’t think I have ever felt that much love and happiness. To be honest, the whole thing really feels a bit like a dream. I’m still not used to calling PBear my husband.

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Photo by Lisa Rigby Photography

And though I had some negative feelings about our wedding a bit after it happened, for the most part, they’re all gone, and only the happy memories remain—I really did not believe people when they said it would happen, but sure enough, it has happened.

Ultimately, I think the whole day ended up being about love. So, what decisions am I really happy we stuck with?

1) Have a tiny wedding

We were fairly conservative in terms of who we invited, and ended up with a wedding size of 42 people (including us). We had originally aimed for 60 people, but I am really thrilled with the number we ended up with. I felt like I got the chance to talk to everyone there and the whole thing felt very intimate.

2) DIYing almost everything

To save money, I spent a lot of time making all sorts of odds and ends. I love seeing all of our wedding pictures and seeing the gorgeous details that were in place. But since everything I made is still in my closet somewhere, I’m glad I didn’t spend a ton of money, buying all that stuff.

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Photo by Lisa Rigby Photography

3) Have a dinner party without dancing

There are a lot of wedding traditions, dancing, garter toss, bouquet toss, that we weren’t comfortable with, and so we skipped them. Instead we focused on having a big meal and delicious food and I’m glad we did. It was much closer to the types of parties that we like to throw.

4) Hire people that we trust.

One of the big reasons that most of our wedding went so smoothly was that we hired people that we really trusted to do their jobs. We wanted people who knew the ins and outs of wedding planning and coordination and people that we actually genuinely liked. Looking back, we didn’t plan very much about the actual day, so I’m glad we had people who knew what to do.

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Photo by Lisa Rigby Photography

5) Eating at our wedding

I always said I would eat at my own wedding, and I made it a priority—it helped that we had a long dinner. I’m so glad we sat our butts down at least a little and got a chance to eat some of it.

6) Taking some time for ourselves

During the cocktail hour, we snuck off just the two of us for a little bit, and it’s a wonderful memory. I am so glad that we got a chance to just reconnect on that day.

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Photo by Lisa Rigby Photography

That being said, there are decisions that I do regret. For example:

1) Not having a plan for running late.

Stuff happens, time flies by, my biggest regret is not having a contingency plan for what we would do if we were running late. In retrospect, I would have made it very clear to everyone that we would be happy to pay for that extra hour to keep the party running longer. Oh well, learn from my mistakes—have a contingency plan!

2) Not letting people help me earlier

I like to be in control of the situation, and the person I trust the most to get it done is myself. Thus, I have a tendency not to let people help me when I know they would absolutely be willing to. It wasn’t until halfway through the morning of the wedding, when I let my bridesmaids put the centerpieces together—I somehow magically thought I would have the time to do it…My girls were amazing the day of, but it made me very aware of how somewhat controlling I might be sometimes (I don’t think I can apologize enough for that…) and that I should have let go earlier.

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Photo by Lisa Rigby Photography

3) Not paying for more photography time

I love my photographer. I could gush about her for ages. I wish we had just sucked it up and gotten an hour or two more from the beginning. I regret that there are moments that she wasn’t there to capture.

4) Spending so much time/money on the little things

There are a few time and money sucks from the wedding that I wish I just hadn’t bothered with. Things like our wedding favors—there are no pictures of the favors the day of, because they didn’t get put out until many people had already left. I’m not really sure what I’m going to do with all this stuff now, oh well. (Yes, I said I would sell them…but it’s been seven months and I haven’t looked at the stuff yet…)

What would you have done differently on your big day?

BLOGGER

Mrs. Panda

Location:
Boston, MA
Wedding Date:
June 2013
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comments

  1. Member
    wellies 1425 posts, Bumble bee @ 10:52 am

    Thank you for sharing your list! The decisions you were happy with are all things we plan to do. :)

  2. Member
    bluewhale 638 posts, Busy bee @ 3:09 pm

    These are such good ones. I’m glad that your “non-traditional” choices ended up being the ones you’re happiest with.

  3. Member
    whitemochi622 247 posts, Helper bee @ 3:33 pm

    I love love love your wedding. Probably one of my favorites I’ve seen. I’m also trying to DIY lots of little things… I like that that’s still one of your good choices… But I also see that you have a note about spending way too much time and effort on the little things too. Hopefully I can take your advice and not be so worried about all my DIY projects, or at least concentrate on the most important ones!

    I also have a fear of something going wrong with my contacts. I know this is one of your negatives from the wedding, but I just want to say I am happy you shared that… Because now I know even if it does happen, I will live! And still have a wonderful wedding despite it, like you did.

  4. Member
    msfilly 827 posts, Busy bee @ 3:39 pm

    You had a gorgeous wedding, and I’m so glad you’re happy with how it turned out. I’m still trying to work on #4, but it’s hard sometimes, haha.

  5. Member
    mswallaby 2040 posts, Buzzing bee @ 6:24 pm

    Aww lady, this post is awesome and I’m going to miss reading (and eyeing) your gorgeous recaps! I think this should become a new WB series, because this would’ve been so helpful to read when I was planning my wedding. It’s crazy how all those details fade away instantly the morning of your wedding, isn’t it?

  6. Member
    panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 7:08 pm

    @Miss Wellies: @Mrs. Blue Whale: yeah I am happy with most of the decisions and I’m glad that it’s becoming more acceptable to have weddings your own way.

    @whitemochi622: aww thank you =) I was wondering if someone would notice that diying is both on my good decisions and bad decisions list. I think it’s a really fine line between getting the look you want versus spending your life on it. Also, I hope you don’t have any troubles with your contacts during your reception! I honestly hope I am the last bride ever to have to deal with that.

    @Miss Filly: #4 is hard.. but you’re going to have an awesome wedding!

    @Mrs. Wallaby: aww thank you. Though I have to admit, your wedding was one of my favorites! Yeah it is crazy how those details just don’t matter at all the day of. I’m glad I have pictures of those details or I never would remember that they were there at all!

  7. Member
    mspalmtree 1122 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:47 pm

    Your wedding was gorgeous, Mrs. Panda. Your overall theme in this post – both the yays and nays – seems to be knowing your priorities and sticking by them. I’m SO glad you and PBear hosted a reception that fit both of YOU. :)

  8. Member
    panda 1359 posts, Bumble bee @ 8:57 pm

    @Mrs. Palm Tree: I’m glad someone can condense my long rambling mess! LOL. I completely agree. I think that is the take home message! Do what makes you happy and stick by it!

  9. Member
    LadyJenks 53 posts, Worker bee @ 3:03 am

    I love your reflection, and I agree with @Mrs. Wallaby that this sort of thing should become a WB series! Even when you know something *shouldn’t* be a big deal it can still loom large during the planning – reading someone else’s ‘big picture’ review helps a lot. :)

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