Weddingbee Blog

I recently joined a book club and the first book the group chose to read was The Time Traveler’s Wife. The movie apparently has a different ending, but I’m sure the same points regarding fate/determinism/chaos are likely still explored.

We were discussing whether the two characters really had a choice in meeting and being together or if it was all pre-determined by fate. This then brought up real life relationships. Did anyone in the group believe in soul mates? Every single one of us answered no.

The more I thought about it, the more strange I thought my own answer was. Mr. D and I always joke that we were fated to meet, because it just seems SO unlikely that it could have happened any other way. My friend Erin asked me if I hadn’t met Mr. D in Austin, did I think we would have met again? While possible, it just seems so unlikely. I’d like to think that had Mr. D and I not met, that we would each find other people who make us just as happy.

However, it’s hard for me to think that or assume the outcome of that situation, since Mr. D is already a part of my reality.
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When Mr. D and I first started talking about marriage, weddings, and rings, we went shopping together to see what was out there. I’d try on a few rings here or there, trying to figure out what we both liked best. I’m not much for surprises, and he wanted to be sure we both loved the ring because we’ll both have to look at it for a long time.

One day we decided to go on a mammoth ring shopping excursion. We had ordered a few rings in from Tiffany’s in the sizes and designs we liked, but hadn’t heard a call from them yet. So we went to Mayors, and a few other places in Coral Gables, trying on rings as we went. Mayors was having an event with multiple settings and multiple loose diamonds… but none of the Asscher cuts my heart had been set on. Mr. D and I were both having a difficult time imagining the settings with a mystery stone. Plus at the time, overweight and in the heat of Miami; my fingers were big. So shoving size 6 rings on and off my finger (for literally hours) was much less fun than I anticipated.

Plus, there is just something about jewelry stores that makes me break out into a sweat. I have no clue why, but I just feel under so much pressure! I was sweaty, hungry and in pain when we decided to take a break and grab lunch. Because if there is one important fact to know about me, it’s this - don’t let my blood sugar drop. At least if you want to stay friends with me. Otherwise, you might disown me and my low blood sugar snappy comments.
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When it came time to plan and write out our ceremony, Mr. D and I were considerably overwhelmed. After all, neither of us had any experience writing a marriage ceremony. After turning to the internet, we then turned to our officiant.

We’d been having a particularly difficult time when it came to wedding rituals. None of the ones we could find really spoke to us as a couple or fit with our ceremony. What if the wind blew out our unity candle? Or if our sand jar was misplaced, broken, or all mixed up during a move? What happens to the water after the water ceremony? What if I spilled wine/chocolate/other food on myself?

Then we started talking about planting ceremonies, which while great, also stumped (tee hee hee) us. We don’t really have anywhere permanent we plan on living for a while; certainly no place to plant a tree. Then we started talking about how much we both loved Austin (where we met) and the Southwest in general. When it hit us: we thought, ‘What if we plant a cactus?’

Sure, a prickly cactus at first glance might not seem the best symbol of a marriage, but if you’ve spent time around them you might see why I find them so impressive.
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I’m finding with the wedding drawing closer and closer each day, my fitness goals seem harder to reach. I had been constantly trying to figure out how to add more cardio to my workouts to supplement my personal training sessions. Go to a class you might say? I don’t belong to a gym, and sadly, I’ve worked my JM Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism DVD into the ground.

(Can I look like her?!?!)

So I did what thousands of people before have done.
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Until I created my Weddingbee application, I hadn’t really ever blogged before. I had only dipped a toe into the “blogosphere” at a previous job and couldn’t fathom that anyone would be interested in what I had to say. I’m certainly not an expert in anything (unless we’re talking PB frosting) and what useful insight could I offer to the faceless internet?

Then, Mr. D and I started going through the K1 visa process. It was rough; we didn’t really know what to expect, and didn’t know a soul who had gone through the entire process. What makes the application worse is that unlike in the movie The Proposal (heck yes we saw it!) you never actually speak to an actual immigration official till the very end. Even then it’s only the immigrant (him) and not the sponsor (me). All you can hope for is a letter followed by other letters.

I had been Googling to find personal stories of the process, for someone other than a forum of conspiracy theorists saying, ”He had a speeding ticket 7 years ago?!?! He’ll be denied!!!” to tell me their story, what happened in their process. But I kept striking out.

Of course, I was also looking (I think for centerpieces) and stumbled across one of Mrs. Avocado’s posts.

I didn’t really “get” Weddingbee at first.
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After seeing this post on Engageology I knew that tissue paper pomanders would make a great addition to our ceremony decor. We aren’t doing too much decorating since we’re hoping to be outside, but in case it rains, these would be able to decorate an indoor ceremony, as well.

The first step? Figure out what tissue paper you want to use. It’s best to do this by getting samples BEFORE you purchase, or finding your tissue paper in person. Don’t trust your computer or the internet to show you how colors look in real life. I originally searched for dark purple, then gave up and looked for light purple, then gave up on that and randomly found ivory tissue paper at the Container Store.

Assemble your tools. I used:

• 22 gauge floral wire (stiff, sturdy but pliable $4.00)
• Tissue paper (ivory, from the Container Store: 3 packs $3.50 each)
• Scissors
• Wire cutters (thanks dad!)
• 5 inch Styrofoam balls (about $4 but use those 40-50% coupons to save $$)
• Hot glue (and glue gun)
• Tny box for the 1,000,000,000+ paper pieces you’ll be cutting out

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No, really… think Jean Gray…

… or Mary Jane… Spiderman’s girlfriend.
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Wellll… it would be great! Because I’m not talking about insects, I’m talking about bloggers! Specifically, these lovely ladies (plus a few hornets and a baby bee).

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I can’t say it enough… Weddingbee rocks! It has changed not only my wedding, but certainly my life, to be able to consistently share and partake in such a wonderful community. This is why I’m ultra grateful that a bee is lending me my something borrowed!

I arrived home from a grueling workout to find this beautiful package on my doorstep.

Okay… maybe it was in a FedEx box… but this was inside of it!
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Just kidding… I’m too scared I’ll lose again! We’re getting down to the wire here, and we need to submit our first dance (and other) songs. The real trouble is simply deciding the first dance song… everything else has been super easy!

Here are the songs in the running:

Otis Redding - That’s How Strong My Love Is

John Legend - Stay With You

Elbow - One Day Like This
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With the hair part done (thanks so much, you guys rock!), it’s time to discuss the makeup part of “getting prettified”. The one thing that always surprises me about bridal makeup is how intense it is. Which makes sense, since I’ll be running around for hours in the August heat being photographed. However… on a Sunday morning… grabbing coffee after the trial? Well… perhaps that should have waited until after the church crowd had departed…

You’ve already seen my makeup inspiration photo, but probably didn’t realize it.

So, how did this look on me? Well, we had to take a guess on the eyes, so here is what we ended up with:
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Thank you so much to everyone who helped me figure out what on earth to do with my head. I ended up going for a blend of the inspiration photos. At first we tried to give the style a bit of texture on the sides, but neither of us were too wild about it.

Then we slicked the front back and gave the bun/chignon part more texture.
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Ed. note: Miss D has her hair trial in the morning and would LOVE your opinion! If you’re up late tonight, it would be awesome if you could let her know your thoughts!

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Zah! I was supposed to be looking for hair inspiration over the past few weeks to prepare for the trial (which is this morning!). Instead, I’ve gone on hair hunts a few times and have seriously overwhelmed myself again. I’m all over the map! Structural chignons, curly loose updos, loose chignons, buns, high, low - ack!

Here’s the deal, I have an oblong head (it’s true, think Alanis Morrisette) and I need an August ready (read: humidity happy), head shaking, boogie down, birdcage wearable updo. Uh… right. Here are the few photos I’ve found that have struck a chord with me.

The fabulous Cherry Pie:

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Oh my gah… When I created our wedding website (several months ago) I thought it might be nice to put a photo up on the landing page. The photo I chose? A picture of ys on a nice, sunny fall day at a wine festival.

Do you see anything strange?

No?
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I never really told the hive about our first baker. She was new and up-and-coming in Baltimore, and her shop was down the street from where I lived in college. She had delicious cream puffs infused with lavender and heavenly chocolate tortes, and though she had just opened a few months prior to our visit, she said she was offering wedding cakes. At the time, we let her know we’d be leaving the country soon and we preferred to sign a contract and place a deposit ASAP. A month passed without a response, and when I’d contact her, she’d ask all the same questions that had been answered and re-ask for the design file. Then? nothing. I repeated that process 2-3 times before finally giving up in March. After I returned to the US, she contacted me asking for the details, specifics, and design files. By then, I’d had enough. I’d already moved on to the idea of a cake buffet, and felt so frustrated at that point with her service. Here I was, trying to give her money and a contract, and I kept getting blown off or stalled. The good news? I experienced her inattentive behavior prior to signing the contract or giving her any money, so it was 100 times easier to walk away from our verbal agreement.

I figured I’d try the one last baker in my area, Sweet, in Ellicott City. We met with Tracey (the cake baker) and while I at first felt guilty that I was taking up her time to discuss a cake buffet rather than one giant, cool, wedding cake, she quickly put me at ease and there were tons of details I hadn’t considered.

We spent about an hour discussing sizes, servings, colors, designs and placement. Poor Mr. D leaned over at one point and whispered, “I just want to eat cake!”
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