Weddingbee

Maybe it makes me a bad bride for saying this, but I hated wedding dress shopping. Now I normally LOVE shopping, but this feels different. First of all, I hate final sales! What if I change my mind? No, that’s not allowed? Maybe it was the pressure of finding this monumentally significant piece of clothing, or maybe it’s that wedding dresses play by different rules than any other items of clothing that I’ve ever been in the market for. Then there is the whole issue of sizing. Dresses are usually made so that you’ll need a size (or several) larger than normal. What if they tell me that I can’t have the dress I want because they don’t make it in my size? Okay, that didn’t happen, but it does happen to someone and that sucks. And finally, why are 95% of wedding dresses strapless? I never go strapless and I am not going to do it for my wedding either. It’s pretty easy to weed through the dresses when you rule out everything strapless.

photo from virtualtourist.com
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Let’s say that you wanted to get married outdoors in Vancouver. You’d think there’d be a million perfect locations, right? This is true, except if you want your guests to be seated. Apparently, while you are free to use the beautiful parks and beaches, chairs are a big no-no.

Here’s a photo of the “gazebo” at the park next to our reception site. Try to imagine it without the nativity scene and the Christmas trees. As much as I wanted to like it, I hated it. The idea of our guests penned up in the gazebo like cattle was just not doing it for me.

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Part 1, 2, 3

After visiting lots of venues over the course of several weeks (which felt like months), we finally found “the one.” It wasn’t listed on any of the wedding websites that I visited or any of the Vancouver wedding guides. I found this one by googling restaurants and then using Google Maps to figure out which ones were close to the water. Let me tell you, this was a tedious task, but it was easier than driving up and down the streets hunting for a venue.

We chose The Beach House at Dundarave Pier, which has a private room upstairs that includes an outdoor deck.

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When vendors excitedly say, “Oh, when did you get engaged!!!” we stutter and say, “Uh, 4 years?” They look confused and say, “Wow, that’s a long time” at which point we give them the condensed version of why this is. Same sex marriage is illegal in the U.S. Now that we are in Canada we can finally get married.

In February 2004, we watched the news with sheer glee as marriage licenses began to be issued to same-sex couples. Del Martin, 83, and Phyllis Lyon, 79, a couple that had been together for 51-years were the first to be married. Their photo was on the front page of the newspaper on Valentine’s Day.

Photo from the San Francisco Chronicle
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During the winter, we were up at Grouse Mountain to try out snowshoeing for the first time.

Photo from http://www.grousemountain.com/
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Let’s say that you are gay and had been living in a country where you couldn’t get legally married. Let’s also say that you had rings custom made anyway and have been wearing them for several years. For all intents and purposes you we considered ourselves married and thought of these rings as our wedding rings. Are you following me? They look like wedding rings, not engagement rings. So what now? When we exchange rings at our wedding should they be new rings? Why? Because we want more jewelry? Most brides have a solitare diamond engagement ring and then add the band later. In our case, two bands on one finger? I am not sure I’ll like that.

Dear Emily Post, what is the proper etiquette for this type of situation?

I searched her website (in jest) and the only reference to rings that I found told me that the groom’s family is traditionally responsible for buying the rings. That really doesn’t help us, so where is a same-sex couple to turn to get advice on how to navigate these little issues? I’m all for making it up as you go along, bucking tradition, etc., but sometimes you want guidelines, right? And if not guidelines, how about just some suggestions? Let me tell you, folks, it’s really overwhelming to be making up EVERYTHING as you go along. They sell wedding planners for a reason.
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One definite drawback to planning a wedding in a new city that has seasons is that it’s really difficult to see past the bleak, cold, rainy winter and envision places as they will look in the summer. I tried, but it just wasn’t happening at this place. Bummer because the location was great.
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Miss GB 2.0 and I are about to celebrate our five year anniversary. Anyone want to guess what we’ll be doing? I’ll give you a hint. It involves boxes.

No, not these boxes.

Image from packingsource.com

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Trying to pick a reception venue in a city that you are unfamiliar with is difficult! We finally made our selection, but before the big reveal, I’ll show you some of the places that we visited along the way. It was a very “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” experience…too big, too small, etc.

Food was paramount to our decision. Location was also important. We really wanted to show our out of town guests (which will be just about everyone) something uniquely Vancouver since they are coming all the way up here for the wedding. The size of our guest list (50ish) allowed us to consider many restaurants.

First, we went to the Brock House. I really liked that they had a package that even included one hour of open bar and wine with dinner, a champagne toast and wedding cake. Another bonus is that there is a very nice place for a sit down, outdoor ceremony. I didn’t know it at the time, but this is a hard thing to find! But I think to really appreciate the Brock House in all of its splendor, you’d need a bigger guest list/budget. The outdoor tent, etc. was more for a party of 200. They do have facilities for a smaller group, but it’s upstairs, and frankly, just not as hot. In terms of the food, it was good, but didn’t “wow” us. I still think it’s a great deal though! So if you are a Vancouver bride or groom and are looking for a great wedding venue, check out the Brock House. But do it fast, because everyone else is also circling the place like hungry wolves.
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The one good thing that came out of attending the Wedding Fair, was meeting Nina of Tartlets. I noticed that her signage said, “Stockholm, Toronto, Vancouver” on it, so I asked her if she was Swedish. This led us to talking about my favorite cake, the traditional Princess Tårta.

Miss GB 2.0 and I went over to North Vancouver for a cake tasting. Nina had prepared a sample of the cake and we discussed the complications of tiered cakes and marzipan. The cake was light and delicious and Nina had some great ideas of how to execute our vision.

I originally thought that I wanted this sort of design for the cake (the one on the right):

Image from an Old Martha Stewart Weddings magazine
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