Weddingbee

There is no way to say this delicately, but it has to be said.

I wanted to have all my hair ripped off pre-wedding. Yes, all of it. I wanted to be smooth and aerodynamic, so that should I need to fly or swim faster than someone else, I would have an edge.

if challenged to a slip ’n slide contest, I’d totally rock you
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Despite the rain the day before, it actually turned out to be a gorgeous, cloudless day .. and we had to break out the parasols and fans for everyone!

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Yea, I know, I spend too much time looking at their website. But if you’re looking for the perfect bridal set, just something for your honeymoon… or because you are narcissistic and want to look at yourself in the mirror in hot lingerie, check out Agent Provocateur’s Online Sale!

Agent Provocateur

I really think they should be sending me kick-backs at this point.

I’ve been trying to ignore it, but it’s impossible.

I knew this would happen…. I’m obsessed with wedding planning.

Admittedly, I was the one who adamantly did NOT want to have a wedding, being forced to have an intervention from Mr. GB and my mother about how I HAD to have one or I’d regret it… I knew why. Because if I let myself start looking, I’d never be able to let go. I can’t stop myself from staring at wedding websites, blogs, photographer links, beautiful designs and thinking how I could integrate that into a gorgeous wedding. Dreaming up DIY projects and thinking up themes that are different and interesting only to look down at my left hand and think “dammit, I’m already married. $(#)!@#!!”

I do have a friend who is getting married next year and doesn’t want to plan it, so I’m getting my planning fix vicariously through her… but after that? All my friends are married or not getting married in the near future. Where will I get my next fix? I need a wedding-dealer, I imagine some shady alley where a couple passes me an envelope of cash for me to call vendors and send them swatches.
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…a complete list of our vendors, but nothing makes me more nervous than actually writing a review. I have no problem with self-deprecation, but if I have to say anything negative, I get all red and flustered and just run. So I’ll say the good, hint to anything that was… not so good, and hope that since our wedding was so long ago, that all our vendors may have turned into dust and washed away. After the months I’ve been gone, I imagine you all thought I turned into dust… but no, I’m here with my vendor list!

I’m going to sort these in an order that may only make sense to me, so part one: The stuff that was so big, they came into my brain first.

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A close friend of mine is getting married today, so I wanted to throw her a mini-bachelorette-party. It was an all day affair, but I won’t go into the list of things we did that may not interest anyone, and if it does, you can always ask. That is, if I don’t disappear off the face of the earth again…

My obsession with turning everyone I know, with boobs and without, onto Agent Provocateur led me to give them a call about having all the girls go and try on things, and pitch in for our friend’s bridal set. I would have settled for a just letting them know they were going to be invaded, but what we got was so much better I had to share.

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It’s true, I do. I’m starting to look like golem and my skin is getting translucent from lack of exposure. I’m expecting to start de-evolving and crawl back into the water, and if I’m lucky, I’ll turn into this.

I love these things
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…about boobage. Now, I’m not overly endowed, but us itty-bitty girls need a way to keep them puppies in for some level of modesty. I’m sure it’d be less than wedding-appropriate to be nipping out all over the farm.Having an open back dress, I didn’t really have that many options, so I’m happy to say that the NuBra worked well for me. I cannot vouch for girls that have nice big melons, but for the mosquito bite troop, this may work for you!

Here it is working well:

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Yes, perhaps you do - but we can go ahead and pretend we’re strangers so we can avoid that awkward silence where you and I both try to conduct a conversation without admitting we don’t know who the other person is.

Despite my recent hermitous (no, that’s not a word) behavior, I did crawl out of my hole and make valentines for people. I’m sorry to anyone who received one as I was going through some crazy ADD moment and they are entirely non-cohesive, and it doesn’t help that my handwriting is that of a 4 year old being forced to write with their off hand. This is why fonts and emails were created, because people wanted to stop hiring hieroglyphic experts in order to read their birthday cards.

See this cute packaging?

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A lot of people seem to want to know about the branches we used for our centerpieces, so here it is! We bought sandblasted manzanita from Nettleton Hollow and just laid the orchid blooms on the branches. That’s it! No glue, no wiring, they were just placed around the branches. I won’t say it was super fast since we had to do so many, but it was very very easy. Thanks to everyone who put them together for me - I was locked in the prep-room while it was put together.

This is how it looked on the table and on the guest book table:

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