Weddingbee Blog

So begins the cold, snowy, icy, expensive Venue Hunt of 2010. I’m sure by now you know we are living in Chicago, but we drove all over God’s green Earth (or so it seemed) to find a decent venue for a small-ish (we were hoping), laid-back wedding. No ordinary banquet hall would do, and we have that strict $10k budget nipping at our heels.

And what were we even looking for in our wedding-day locale? Paying homage to our roots in rural Illinois, we ached for nothing but a country wedding ceremony outside with a rowdy reception inside an old red barn. Renovated, of course. We didn’t want our guests to freeze to death after the sun goes down or, God forbid, step in a cow pie.

And so began my first torrid venue love affair with a big red barn, hours away from my hometown.

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Mr. Jam and I have been living together (in sin, depending on who you talk to) for two-and-a-half years already. And in that time, we’ve created a real life together: we got a cat, a dog, and some mutual hobbies, and we bought a house, and filled it with a ton of really cool furniture…which also happens to be one of our mutual hobbies. Birds of a feather, baby.

Anyhoodle, all of this boils down to a few keywords: Responsibility. Finances. Growing up. Commitments.

Whether you have piles of monthly bills or are living under your parents’ roof, the first step in your life as newly engaged folks is to determine a reasonable budget and never, ever lose sight of it. The obvious rules apply: Only spend what you can afford to spend, and don’t go into debt for a wedding.
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’Tis true, hive. Mr. Jam proposed on the coldest, rainiest, iciest, most miserable—and memorable—evening in recent Chicago-weather-related memory…outside.

Here’s a shocker: We weren’t dressed for the occasion.

One hot second after he popped the question

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The Jam story began in early 2006, when my college friend’s boyfriend was supposed to come visit her. Unfortunately, her roommate also planned on having an obscene number of visitors that same weekend, so my friend’s boyfriend decided to spend his weekend visiting his best friend (enter Mr. Jam into this insane mix) at a different college two hours away.

Are you confuzzled? I know, it’s so weird. But it gets better.

[source]

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This weekend, I was a plus-one at a wedding, otherwise known as the I-don’t-know-anyone-except-the-wedding-party-so-I’m-hanging-out-alone-until-the-reception girl. Have you been there? It’s a little lonely. Especially when, five seconds before walking into the church, you discover you’ve been accepted to join the hive and you have to keep it a secret during the hour-long ceremony.

I may have looked relaxed and composed and happy at our friends’ stellar wedding, but it was really just well-hidden, stealth turmoil.
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