I agonized over our first-dance song for months years. Maybe even before we got engaged. So what, OK? I’d give up junk food before I gave up my iTunes library, and that is saying something.
My idea of what our first dance might be changed over the years. If you would have told me in 2002 that we’d wind up getting married, I would have said that our first-dance song would be “The Luckiest” by Ben Folds. Alas, we relinquished that as one of our songs in 2006, when we attended a Ben Folds concert with 500 weepy/drunk college girls singing along. Kind of marred it for us.
We have probably…10-ish songs that feel deeply personal to our relationship, the songs that take me back to important moments that I can’t portray here or in a slow dance in our wedding. I know it’s weird to say, but those songs? They’re ours. I didn’t want them to be aired in a public arena. (I am protective of our love…which is why I write about it on the internet.)
That said, I guess I imagined us dancing to some charmingly personal indie song. A song so well chosen, so avant-garde that it was the enemy of cheesy. But…it just didn’t feel right. I can’t explain it, but my gut said no. In fact, nothing felt right. We danced to a lot of “our” songs in our living room, trying them on to see how they felt. They all felt like we were trying too hard.