Weddingbee

Mrs. Bee here. I know I’ve blogged about the following topic before, but I can’t remember if it was on weddingbee or my personal blog. Still it’s an interesting question that always sparks a lot of discussion.

Reader A posted the following reader buzz:

My best friend’s mom told her to marry a guy who loves her more than she loves him. This is so she’ll have the upper hand, and will be treated very well, with less chance of being cheated on.

In your relationships, who do you think loves more? You or your FI/DH? Do you agree with my friend’s mom’s theory?

Mrs. Bee here.

Reader Annie left this comment on the last reader buzz, and for some reason, it cracked me up:

I’m relatively new to weddingbee, so i don’t know all the rules. Is there a reason why you almost never talk about sex? I always thought it was a huge topic in marriage, like the whole saving yourself til honeymoon, a reason why people divorce, ways to keep the relationship hot. Is it because you want to keep the site PG or that some of your moms/relatives/churchgoing friends read this?

Yes Annie, my mom does read this site, but that doesn’t really affect whether or not we talk about sex. And while we may not have talked about sex as extensively in the past, you’re right - it should be a regular topic of conversation here on weddingbee.

So let’s dive right into it with a poll.

Mrs. Bee here.

Mr. Bee was very careful not to scare me off the in the beginning of our relationship, so he let me take the lead. He knew I was the one right away, but I was extremely skeptical, guarded, and cautious because to tell you the truth, I just didn’t believe in love for someone like me. I guess I was too practical. Not to mention that I didn’t believe in long distance relationships.

It took me a little while for all of it to sink in. But once it did - it was actually me who was the first one to say, “I love you.” This was around 2-3 weeks after we met.

So who said I love you first and how long did it take?

~~

PS - Mr. Bee came up with the idea for this reader buzz. Please feel free to provide suggestions for future reader buzz topics!

Mrs. Bee here.

For the first 10 months of our relationship, Mr. Bee and I were long distance so our main mode of communication was the phone. One time we even talked a record 10 hours straight.

But since Mr. Bee and I moved in together, we hardly ever talk on the phone. We’re both online 24/7 so our main mode of communication is im. We’ve even been known to im each other when we’re in the same room. We’ll also send emails and text messages quite regularly, but we rarely talk on the phone. Since we met through my blog, I guess we’re just an internet obsessed couple.

How do you and your fiance stay in touch day to day? Phone? IM? Text messages? Email?

Mrs. Bee here.

Mr. Bee doesn’t understand why I never wear makeup when we go out, but always put makeup on when I go out with my girlfriends. For him it’s the exact opposite - he doesn’t care what he looks like in front of his friends. If he’s going to get dressed up, it’s going to be for me.

I was having dinner with a couple of Ladies Who Launch members awhile back and asked them if they were the same way. They all said yes - women dress for other women, not for men was our consensus.

Do you get more dressed up when you go out with your girlfriends than you do when you go out with your significant others?

(image via bizzyb)

Mrs. Bee here.

In yesterday’s reader buzz we talked about interracial marriages, and several of you mentioned that religion was actually a bigger issue or challenge than race. Neither Mr. Bee nor I are religious, so we had a completely nondenominational ceremony. But I’ve had friends that have faced major issues with their in laws regarding converting to a specific religion, or holding two maybe even three separate wedding ceremonies.

Are you and your significant other from different religious backgrounds? Has it presented any challenges in your relationship, your relationship with your in-laws, or with the wedding planning process?

Mrs. Bee here.

I’m the first one in my family to enter into an interracial marriage - I’m Korean and Mr. Bee is half Japanese, half White. I must admit that before I met Mr. Bee, I never thought that I would marry someone who wasn’t Korean. Having a spouse that shared a cultural background was something that was important to me, and my pretty traditional family. But when I met Mr. Bee, none of that mattered because *cue cheesy music* I knew without a doubt that he was “the one.”

Are you and your significant other from different racial/ethnic backgrounds? Has it presented any challenges in your relationship and your relationships with your families?

Mrs. Bee here.

Mr. Bee and I don’t have nicknames for each other and just call each other “honey.” Boring I know, but considering that my name is Bee, it’s actually appropriate no?

What terms of endearment and nicknames do you and your significant other have for each other?

Mrs. Bee here.

Huinita (whose wedding we’ve featured in the past) linked to an astrological compatibility site yesterday. I love astrology because it’s a cool part in the story of how Mr. Bee and I met!

I’m a Scorpio (quintuple Scorpio I’m told 8O) and Mr. Bee’s a Virgo. This is what the site said about our compatibility:

Ack - We’re nearly perfect partners! But to me we’ll always be perfect partners (barf :D).

How compatible are you and your partner’s astrological signs?

Do you think asking for cash instead of traditional wedding gifts is tacky?

These days couples are marrying later in life or for the second time, and may already have all the items that would traditionally be on a registry. So alternative cash registries - down payments towards a house, a honeymoon, school tuition even - are becoming more popular than ever.

According to this Detroit News article, advice columnist Amy Alkon says, “It’s tacky to ask for money.” On the other hand Peggy Post, the great-granddaughter-in-law of etiquette expert Emily Post, says “alternative registries” are acceptable. But she also says that if you do decide to go the alternative registry route, you should have a traditional registry to give guests the option.

Sound advice because some people just don’t feel comfortable giving or feeling obligated to gift cash. Even when gifting cash is part of your culture, it’s still a good idea to at least have a small traditional registry. So let’s find out your opinions on cash wedding gifts!