Dropping the Ball

No, not me. I’m talking about our first caterer visit—or non-visit, as it were.

After being pretty pumped about getting an appointment to do a tasting during one of the only available times between the work-school-work insanity that is my life, we had one of our biggest disappointments yet in the planning process.

Both Monsieur P and I had to make arrangements to leave work early in order to make it to the appointment, which was supposed to start at 5:00. At 5:02 (with such a jam-packed schedule, I often am a few minutes behind), I was yanking on the caterer’s doors, to no avail. They were locked. I poked around and the place appeared to be empty, which I didn’t think really made sense, as their normal hours were supposed to be until 6:00 PM, though they operate mainly through appointments, of course.

I went back to my car, pulled up the email on my phone to make sure I had the right day and time, and I did. I called the number in the email and left a voicemail something like this: “Hi, this is Miss Parisian”¦I’m here, but no one else seems to be”¦I don’t know what happeneddddd”¦” with mounting annoyance at the end because the longer I waited, the more angry I got!

By this point, the mister had shown up, completely confused. He had gotten caught up at work coming back from a trip and had to drop off a fleet vehicle, so he was running a little later than I was. He could tell from the look on my face that something wasn’t right, or maybe he could see the steam coming out of my ears. He asked me what was wrong, and I pretty much exploded.

Mobile data roaming charges - woman in red screaming at mobile phone

Image via which.co.uk


A much more adorable version of how Monsieur P found me / Image via Dynamic Edge, Inc.

The anger, disappointment, frustration, and, strangely enough, embarrassment, made me want to cry. I know it’s stupid to cry over something as silly as a vendor missing an appointment, but I knew that this was one shot to get something done for the wedding, and I had already set my mind to this caterer being my #1 choice. We gathered our composure and headed home, where I promptly changed into PJs and moped on the couch the rest of the evening.

This sounds about right”¦ / Image via someecards

Since that incident, I have received a couple of voicemails and emails from the caterer, with what I deemed to be a bullshit apology and explanation—that there is another girl with the same name getting married at the same place, who scheduled an appointment for another day/time, so they got them mixed up and thought I had rescheduled our appointment.

And then, I did a horrible thing. I did nothing. I didn’t respond to the emails or the voicemails.

Now, there’s something you should know about me. I’m headstrong, bull-headed, stubborn, outspoken, and generally not afraid of confrontation. But I can also be a bit of a conflict-avoider at times, which is the trait that took over in this situation. I couldn’t bring myself to terms with the situation and find the right way to move forward, so I just did nothing.

Now, we’re eight months from the day and still don’t have our caterer situation figured out, because I can’t seem to bring myself to deal with it. I think the hardest part is thinking that I may veto my top-choice vendor based on one count of poor time management. But standing us up for an appointment, to me, shows a few different negative things—poor management in the office, a disrespect for my time, and the potential for future mishaps, just because my name is popular enough to get me confused with another bride?! In the end, I can’t see us choosing a vendor that made such a big mistake and put so much distrust into my mind. Life is stressful enough without dealing with a flaky vendor.

Did you suffer any planning setbacks? Were you stood up by a vendor? Please tell me I’m not the only one with avoidance issues”¦


Miss Parisian

Pittsburgh, PA
Bands of Love
Highway to Happiness: And Then the Chaos
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  1. mswaterfall Bee
    Mrs. Waterfall 1403 posts, Bumble bee @ 11:04 am

    I think you’re justified in crossing them off your list. There is such a plethora of vendors out there, and if a vendor can’t be bother to answer emails, return phonecalls, or worse… SHOW UP to a meeting when they’re still trying to get your business, I’m not very confident on how they’ll behave once they already have your money. I wouldn’t deal with them either. Mistakes are human, but there is such a thing as professionalism. And, if I just forgot to meet with one of my clients, or missed a court date, they wouldn’t want to be doing business with me either, right?

  2. parisian Bee
    Miss Parisian 588 posts, Busy bee @ 11:11 am

    @Mrs. Waterfall: That’s how I figured it as well. Of course, our venue actually limits our options, so there’s a chance we could end up still using that vendor, but I would prefer to deal with someone who is professional from the beginning.

  3. Member
    EllieBeeM 2 posts, Wannabee @ 5:22 pm

    TWICE!!! First we had 2 mariachi bands that we had previously heard and loved, we decided to meet with our favorite to book them and pay our deposit. The manager never showed up to the meeting, the person at the office told us to leave the money and write down our name, date and time. We walked out immediately. First the manager didn’t care to respect our time or leave us a message and the second person sounded like a scam. RED FLAGS ALL OVER.
    The second vendor issue was with my dress. I ordered my dress about 7 or 8 months in advance. The only thing I loved about the dress was the color “antique ivory” and lace. The idea was to completely modify the dress when it arrived. The store called me two months later to let me know the store was closing, but they would still take care of any clients they already had. When the dress arrived I made my appointment to pick it up, but the representative never showed up. During this time they did appointments only. I was pissed off, after a voicemail and email I kept calling. They finally answered and said they didn’t SEE my appointment, not once apologized. I made a second appointment, the representative was 15 minutes late and they ordered the wrong color! After a lot of back and forth I got the ok to get a refund.
    This company is now closed so there is no need to review them or use social media to let people know what a horrible experience they provided.
    Listen to all the signs and go with your gut. Check out all your vendors at least through three reliable sources.

  4. gondola Bee
    gondola 1046 posts, Bumble bee @ 3:17 am

    As someone who had a bad first meeting with my cake vendor which eventually led to her canceling my order, proceed with caution. And try to get a discount or bargain to make up for not showing up.

  5. parisian Bee
    Miss Parisian 588 posts, Busy bee @ 6:11 am

    @EllieBeeM: Oh gosh, that sounds awful! Thank goodness you had the good sense to not give your money to the band (agree it sounds too sketchy to be legitimate), and that you were able to get your dress refunded. But that had to have been so stressful!
    @Mrs. Gondola: Yeah, as sad as it is, I probably will avoid that vendor at all costs. It sucks because their menu was amazing though!

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