Determining The Order Of Your Bridal Party

It tends to go unspoken or just mentioned in jest. However, having attended several weddings and been a bridesmaid myself, I have observed one small potential area of tension: the order the couple chooses to arrange its bridesmaids and groomsmen. While the bridal party for the most part either seems to understand or doesn’t seem to care, I have noticed in some cases where some BMs/GMs feel slightly hurt that their names are at the bottom of the list or that they stand at the outermost end of the line.

Because the bridal party is often arranged in some kind of order of their relationship to the bride/groom, I have just noticed a few cases where a BM/GM is just a little bit hurt. But they usually don’t make a big deal out of it, since after all, it is the couple’s day and they should be able to arrange it the way they choose!

It’s a non-issue for many couples, but for others, it can sometimes get to be a big deal, especially if you have an extremely tight-knit group of friends! That has been the case for us…in fact, we have an extremely large wedding party with multiple MOHs and best men because each of these particular friends are so important to us and in no way do we want to suggest they are a lesser friend than anyone else. Among other couples I have talked to, we’ve observed a few ways that some brides/grooms have gone around this issue. To avoid this, some have arranged their wedding party as follows: :

  • By height
  • By alphabetical order
  • By how long you have known them w/o regard to how close you are
  • By age
  • Or leaving the decision up to the wedding coordinator and having nothing to do with it!

What I most likely will do is arrange my bridesmaids in chronological order in terms of when we became friends. However, I thought these questions might make for some interesting discussion…

Have any of you given this subject some thought? Was it even a concern at all? And for those of you who have already done this, how did you decide to arrange the order of your bridal party?


Mrs. Daffodil

Los Angeles
Wedding Date:
May 2016
Surprise Bouquet Toss
Details Part 3: This Is The Last Of All My Wedding Crap. I Mean "Details".
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  1. Guest Icon Guest
    Hayley, Guest @ 2:56 pm

    My sister and his friend are not together. sorry didnt add it in

  2. Guest Icon Guest
    Laura, Guest @ 3:02 am

    My sister put me at the end of the line behind girls that did not even include her in their own wedding partys. I was hurt by that, maybe our 20 something years together did’t mean much to her. Now I have the painful task of how to order my own Bridesmaids!

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