Why the Long Engagement?

Mr. A and I got engaged over a year ago (February 15, 2009 to be exact). For the average bride, picking a wedding date would have involved a one-year engagement, which if we had gone that route, would have us getting married about now. But, I’ve always wanted a fall wedding, for a few reasons. Mostly because fall in the Midwest is G-ORGEOUS. The colors are fantastic (see: engagement photos).

Images courtesy of Lisa Hessel Photography

While we could have gotten married in Fall 2009, a 9 to 10 month engagement was too short for me.

I wanted some time to enjoy the engagement and time to plan without pulling my hair out (because I totes would have). The Mr. was game for what I wanted, so there were no complaints from him. The obvious decision? Wait until fall the following year (fall 2010). Not only did this give us time to really plan, it gave us time to enjoy our engagement, and get first pick on a lot of the vendors in town. Most places in St. Louis book up fast within a year. So, with a 17 month engagement, we had quite the lead time ahead of most engaged couples in the area.

I’m not gonna lie ”“ it has been a long ride, but it’s one I have fully enjoyed. We’ve really had time to comb over any big decisions. And, I’ve had time to meet with our booked vendors on multiple occasions to get a lot of the details taken care of early on, all adding up to practically no stress.

Yes, we’ve had our highs and lows of wedding planning (and I’m not referring to goods and bads, arguments and make-ups. I’m talking being really busy at times and bored out of my mind at times). The entire process has been pretty bipolar (okay, mostly bipolar). We spend a few months really hashing out details and vendors, and then spend the next few doing absolutely nothing at all. It’s a bit confusing, but I would not change it for anything.

Was your engagement long or short? Were the seasons a factor in your decision to wait?


Mrs. Argyle

St. Louis
Wedding Date:
September 2010
"You're My Lobster"
A Budget Bride's Search for the Perfect Bridesmaid's Dress
Add a comment


  1. Member
    ResearchBride 41 posts, Newbee @ 10:04 pm

    Ya know it’s funny. I got engaged the same day as you and am getting married at the end of Sept of this year. After all this time, I feel like we definitely could have gotten married already. But we wanted to get married in the fall because it’s our favorite time of the year. The venue we choose only had 1 Saturday left in Sept/Oct and thus our wedding date. I remember when I first started planning everyone said “you have plenty of time” Well after the holidays rolled around all of sudden I got the “you haven’t done that yet?!” After some weeks of stress, I finally feel like I’m enjoying the planning process better. Maybe a shorter engagement would have been better but I’m happy where we’re at now. 🙂 good luck with planning!

  2. Member
    Skywalk 87 posts, Worker bee @ 10:09 pm

    My engagement will be just under a year for a similar seasonal reason.
    I have always wanted to get married in September, it’s my favourite month of the year. Fall just starts to show it’s seasonal face while the summer sun is still shining beautifully with a softer warmth than the height of summer.
    It just turned out that my fiance chose to propose in September of 2009 and wanted to be married before the end of 2010…love a man that wants to just get on with it! :o)

  3. Member
    Jenniphyr 3426 posts, Sugar bee @ 11:24 pm

    We will have been engaged for 3 years, 11 months, and 19 days when we get married. We got engaged Valentine’s Day 2009, and are getting married on our date-a-versary (February 2nd) in 2013. The reason? We’re waiting until we’ve both graduated (he’ll graduate Dec 2012 if the world doesn’t end) — for financial reasons. While attending school we can stay at home with our parents rent-free, and we’re still covered under their health insurance (makes birth control a LOT less expensive). It’ll also be a lot easier to finish up the last-minute wedding planning when I’m out of school.

  4. Member
    jordynrose 6351 posts, Bee Keeper @ 12:31 pm

    Our engagement will almost be 2 years. It is less seasonal, and more so because I will not finish school until this May. Summer is way too hot for a wedding in the southwest (unless all indoors, and not what we want). Fall was my first choice, so luckily I don’t have to go much longer.

  5. Guest Icon Guest
    Ameliya, Guest @ 3:55 pm

    My fiance proposed on Christmas Day 2009. We picked our wedding date that same day and will be getting married in 2012. I just started a business and want to have time to plan ,and save for, the perfect wedding and honeymoon. So our engagement will be a 30 month engagement! We have been together for 3 years now, so it doesn’t matter to me. As long as we walk down the aisle some day!

  6. Member
    mrspaetz 3812 posts, Honey bee @ 9:46 pm

    ours was short because we had to deal with the hassles of US immigration.

  7. Member
    marieta 339 posts, Helper bee @ 4:57 pm

    Ours is long because of financial reasons (as in he’d lose some financial aid for college if we got married too soon), but I also feel strongly that I want a spring wedding. So if we get the financials worked out and we’re still a year away… well, I’m willing to wait for the next spring.

  8. Member
    MaineCountryBride 29 posts, Newbee @ 11:37 pm

    Our engagement was two days before Christmas 2009, and we had talked about having a fall wedding,so it is set Oct 2010! Once we nailed down a venue I was relieved. A lot of places we contacted were booked for the whole year already, YIKES!

  9. msgiraffe Bee
    msgiraffe 4248 posts, Honey bee @ 4:47 pm

    Ours is looooong! 2.5 years!

  10. Member
    cnuptain 330 posts, Helper bee @ 4:41 pm

    We’re having a 21 month engagement and I couldn’t be happier. Our date is the Sunday of Memorial Day and our vendors booked up super quick so I loved having first pick at everything!

1 3 4 5

add a comment

Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors