When I left off, I was contemplating the negative portrayal of modern brides and weddings that I’ve been noticing in the media and in my interactions with people. There seems to be a school of thought that says that most people throw big weddings for less-than-awesome reasons, or that the act of having a wedding itself is inherently wasteful and unnecessary.
But I think that it’s totally legit that Mr. Octopus and I decided to have the wedding we’re having. Yes, it’s going to be big, yes, it’s going to be what most people would consider traditional and what some might consider fancy, and yes, it’s going to be expensive. But I really believe that it was the best possible choice for us. Here is why:
Because I wanted to give this transition in our lives a heavy weight. Mr. O and I will have been together for eight years by the time we come up on our wedding day. We were boyfriend and girlfriend for a very, very long time, and becoming husband and wife feels like a major rite of passage to both of us. We both wanted a fairly long engagement (sixteen months) and a big wedding because we wanted to really feel this change.
Because I want to have a once-in-a-lifetime throw down of a party. Mr. O and I place a huge value on experiences. I have never once regretted spending money on having an amazing travel experience, going out to a really special meal, or otherwise doing something fun and interesting that I can look back on happily. Yes, we could put a down payment on a house with the money the wedding will cost, but having this one incredibly special experience instead of upgrading from our one-bedroom apartment outfitted in Craigslist-chic decor was more important to us right now. As one review of One Perfect Day put it, “weddings, unlike most other things we purchase, reliably deliver heart-stopping measures of joy.”
Plus, our people are spectacular partiers. I would never purposefully give up an opportunity to unleash my friends and family on some booze and a dance floor. It’s going to be epic.
So there you have it—the reasons for our wedding, none of which involve an elaborate performance art piece I’ve been concocting ever since I first laid eyes on a Barbie doll. This was a conscious and purposeful choice that Mr. O and I made with our families, fully aware that we had other options, but wanting this one the most. So in your face, anonymous Internet haterz!
How did you choose the type of wedding you’re having? What does it mean to you?