Mrs. Glasses, Tokyo/Los Angeles, CAAge and Occupation: 24, English teacherFiance's Age and Occupation: 27, English teacherEngagement Date: September 2008Wedding Date: October 2010 Venue: Parents' backyardAbout Me: I’m an expat living in Tokyo. I’ve been in Japan for almost three years now, where I met my fantastic English fiance. It’s time to leave Japan, so we are planning a fun, intimate, backyard ceremony back home in the suburbs of L.A. in October. Our wedding will be a mix of my love for food, beer, my Japanese culture, and Mr. G’s Englishness. We are on a tiny budget and DIYing almost everything!
It’s time to get down to the nitty-gritty. Let’s talk about the actual ceremony portion of our wedding. I think this is the most wide-open detail of the day so I’ve really dreaded putting pen to paper, so to speak, and writing out what will go down. It’s also touchy for me because I know Mr. G’s parents won’t be there to celebrate with us which makes me want to cry! It would be really nice to have both of our parents there but Mr. G’s parents will be with us in spirit; I’ll leave it at that.
We won’t be having a religious ceremony as Mr. G is atheist and I’m Buddhist, but want to keep it as neutral as possible. And oh yeah, we’ll already be married! See what I mean by wide-open? All the traditional things that usually happen at a ceremony don’t need to happen at ours!
We need to pick an “officiant” of sorts who can at least MC what’s going to happen. We want our ceremony to be silly and fun and emotional and meaningful. Just how will we accomplish this? Read more…
Mrs. Glasses, Tokyo/Los Angeles, CAAge and Occupation: 24, English teacherFiance's Age and Occupation: 27, English teacherEngagement Date: September 2008Wedding Date: October 2010 Venue: Parents' backyardAbout Me: I’m an expat living in Tokyo. I’ve been in Japan for almost three years now, where I met my fantastic English fiance. It’s time to leave Japan, so we are planning a fun, intimate, backyard ceremony back home in the suburbs of L.A. in October. Our wedding will be a mix of my love for food, beer, my Japanese culture, and Mr. G’s Englishness. We are on a tiny budget and DIYing almost everything!
This is a bamboo tree that displays peoples’ wishes on strips of paper (called tanzuku) once a year during the Tanabata Star Festival, on July 7th.
The story of this tree is a love story! Read more…
Mrs. Sewing, San Mateo, CA/Honolulu, HIAge and Occupation: 24, Electrical EngineerFiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Electrical EngineerEngagement Date: June 27, 2009Wedding Date: July 2010Venue: Anela Garden Chapel & Japanese Cultural Center, HonoluluAbout Me: I'm an easily entertained, compulsive idea-scheming machine who loves good art, good food, and a good engineering challenge. I'm planning a half-destination wedding on the beautiful island of Oahu - imagine a plethora of movies, art and games; savory Hawaiian food; blended Chinese and Japanese cultural details; lush, fragrant tropical flowers and all the air conditioning a NorCal native could want! And once I marry the love of my life, we'll come back to the 'mainland' to party it up all over again in my hometown of Salinas, the salad-bowl capital of the world!
Three of the last four weddings I have attended have involved Asian brides. And you know what that means, right? Dress changes!
Though I may only be half-Asian, I fully look forward to and embrace the tradition of changing one’s dress several times throughout the reception. Indeed, I had it all planned out. In addition to my traditional white gown and Chinese cheongsam, I would also wear a uchikake - the Japanese wedding kimono.
Miss Peach, New Jersey/AtlantaAge and Occupation in 07: 25, Mechanical EngineerFiance's Age and Occupation: 24, StudentEngagement Date: January 27, 2006Wedding Date: March, 2007Venue: Korean Presbyterian Church of Atlanta + Flint HillAbout Me: Mr. Peach and I started dating our senior year of high school when we both lived in Georgia. Since then, we spent 6 years in a long distance relationship. And now by the grace of God, we've made it through; we are living in the same state again (NJ) and we are gettin' married! I was originally going to ask if I could be Miss Mango bc I loveee mangos sooo much, but in the end decided to be true to my GA peach roots! woot!
This post was originally published on October 31st, 2006.
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Anna Niponica custom designs beautiful dresses out of gorgeous silk kimonos — *sigh* They are based in Japan, however, they do accept orders from overseas via Paypal.
Miss Carousel, Dusseldorf, Germany/Garda, ItalyAge and Occupation: 29, International Product ManagerFiance's Age and Occupation: 31, Front End DeveloperEngagement Date: May 29, 2010Wedding Date: September 2011Venue: I’m an American-Italian girl living in Germany with my Belgian fiancé, planning a wedding in Italy. I can’t wait to show our guests the wonderful Lake Garda, Verona, and want our wedding to be a fun filled, charming, day in the life of “La dolce vita.” Mr. C and I love spending time together, and have added wedding related activities to our cooking nights, dance lessons, and road trips. We love sampling restaurants, could listen to Sinatra all day, and are just a tad geeky and into technology. As we want all of our passions to be part of our marriage, what better way to start than by incorporating them in our wedding day?
Nowadays it is very easy to share ideas and gather wedding inspiration from all over the world. However, regardless of the style and design choices, wedding customs and conventions are still very much local. (Yes, even weddings have gone glocal.)
At our wedding there will be guests from different countries and continents. They will all have different wedding expectations and will compare our wedding to what they are used to. Here is a small overview of what kind of expectations we might be dealing with:
Northern Europe
From what I’ve seen, in Northern Europe proposals and marriages are very underrated. There is not much pressure to get married to begin with, as many couples never get married at all. Engagement rings are often simple bands and the ceremony is a private affair where only close family participates. All the friends join later on in the evening (or even the day after) for a dinner plus disco-style dancing, which often goes on till the wee hours of the morning. Read more…
Mrs. Pain au Chocolat, Wilmington, DEAge and Occupation: 29, RealtorFiance's Age and Occupation: 34, RealtorEngagement Date: November 21, 2009Wedding Date: June 2011Venue: Greenville Country ClubAbout Me: An ENFJ with an artistic streak who loves backgammon, sailing, graphic design, and sleeping in. Travel (near or far), good wine, and tasty food makes my heart sing. I'm a compulsive list-maker who lives to plan and organize. Mr. P and I have lived together for 4 years, all the while renovating our city townhome bit by bit. We're planning a whimsical, Anthropologie-inspired garden wedding in June 2011.
In preparation for our phone meeting with the officiant this Thursday, Mr. P and I are gathering ideas for our ceremony. We approach tasks very differently. Whereas I like to start with the maximum number of possibilities and narrow down from there (lest I miss something awesome), he begins with a much narrower focus and expands outward as necessary…
This explains why I currently have seven tabs of ceremony inspiration blog posts open in my Safari browser, a wedding workbook (from just-marrieds K&M), and a desktop folder simply titled “ceremony.” I’m fully capable of driving myself nuts.
Here’s summary of things we’d like to incorporate into our ceremony:
1. Write our own vows.
After reading about Mrs. Seahorse’s vow-writing stress, I knew this seemingly innocuous task would need to be done far in advance and given its own month.
2. Keep it (relatively) short.
It won’t be Vegas-fast or Catholic-church-long. Neither of us is game for an hour of standing (fainting?) in the June heat. The ceremony ought to be long enough for it to feel serious and official, but there’s no need to drag it out unnecessarily. Twenty minutes feels right. Read more…
Mrs. Cotton Candy, Riverside, CAAge and Occupation: 29, Field CoordinatorFiance's Age and Occupation: 34, Process ServerEngagement Date: July 5, 2007Wedding Date: June 2011Venue: Riverside Art MuseumAbout Me: I’m a girl in love with her best friend planning a small mid-century modern inspired wedding that’s been a long time coming. I love all things design, sewing, flea markets, and a good book. I’ve been known to swoon over a well-designed chair and often find myself craving a new addition to my chair collection regardless of the lack square footage in our home. I’m Mexican American girl who hates all things spicy but loves her rowdy Mexican family and her Latin roots. My wedding muses may not be your typical wedding superstars, but with a lot of DIY, a dash of offbeat style, and lots of love and laughs, Mr. Cotton and I plan to create a day that is unmistakably us.
Last October the mister and I, on a whim, found ourselves partaking in the Day of the Dead celebrations at Olvera Street in downtown L.A. For those who have never had the pleasure of spending some time at Olvera Street, I highly encourage you to go. The street is not really that large—maybe a city block—but it’s jam-packed with vendors and yummy restaurants.
The Day of the Dead celebration was out-of-control incredible. The mariachi bands playing were amazing and made me want to start revising our budget so we could afford to hire one, and all over the plaza there were these amazing alters dedicated to loved ones who have passed away.
Mrs. French Toast, Pleasanton, CAAge and Occupation: 29, Marketing & PRFiance's Age and Occupation: IT geek by day, self-proclaimed handyman by nightEngagement Date: October 2009Wedding Date: March 2011Venue: Palm Event CenterAbout Me: I’m a city girl at heart who moved to the suburbs a year ago. Now I’m adjusting to life with a front lawn, nosy neighbors, cooking attempts, and making sure the garbage pail is pulled out on time every week! When I’m not traveling, Mr. FT and I enjoy marathon sessions of Law & Order: SVU, snowboarding, photography, spoiling our 3-year old yorkie-poodle Mokka and disagreeing over what music to listen to in the car. We’re planning a small winery wedding while incorporating some cultural elements into the day as a nod to our Chinese backgrounds.
Mrs. Bacon, ChicagoAge and Occupation: 26, Digital Advertising ManagerFiance's Age and Occupation: 25, IT Client ServicesEngagement Date: June 17, 2010Wedding Date: September 2011Venue: Ravenswood Billboard FactoryAbout Me: I'm a Midwestern girl that can't seem to commit to staying in one place for too long and is constantly daydreaming about my next adventure. I am an aspiring foodie with a weak spot for the unusual and I love semi-reality food television. My other loves easily include laughing as a form of exercise, a book that I can't put down, summer baseball games, espresso with whipped cream, couch potato days and nights with the ridiculous Mr. Bacon, and our two kitties, Lincoln and Sawyer. We're planning a faux-destination wedding for 150 of our closest friends and family in the city we've both adopted as home that has a modern, yet whimsical twist and as many personal touches as we can manage.
In honor of the two weeks of Chinese New Year celebrations going on around the world, I figured this would be the perfect time to talk about the Baconlicious Tea Ceremony we’re going to have!
While the moms were in town for the Dresscapades, we had lots of time to chat while driving from salon to salon. FMIL Bacon is really excited to learn about the Chinese (well, East Asian) custom of a tea ceremony, but she’s really worried that the rest of the future in laws are going to be totally lost. Read more…
Mrs. French Toast, Pleasanton, CAAge and Occupation: 29, Marketing & PRFiance's Age and Occupation: IT geek by day, self-proclaimed handyman by nightEngagement Date: October 2009Wedding Date: March 2011Venue: Palm Event CenterAbout Me: I’m a city girl at heart who moved to the suburbs a year ago. Now I’m adjusting to life with a front lawn, nosy neighbors, cooking attempts, and making sure the garbage pail is pulled out on time every week! When I’m not traveling, Mr. FT and I enjoy marathon sessions of Law & Order: SVU, snowboarding, photography, spoiling our 3-year old yorkie-poodle Mokka and disagreeing over what music to listen to in the car. We’re planning a small winery wedding while incorporating some cultural elements into the day as a nod to our Chinese backgrounds.
Mrs. French Toast, Pleasanton, CAAge and Occupation: 29, Marketing & PRFiance's Age and Occupation: IT geek by day, self-proclaimed handyman by nightEngagement Date: October 2009Wedding Date: March 2011Venue: Palm Event CenterAbout Me: I’m a city girl at heart who moved to the suburbs a year ago. Now I’m adjusting to life with a front lawn, nosy neighbors, cooking attempts, and making sure the garbage pail is pulled out on time every week! When I’m not traveling, Mr. FT and I enjoy marathon sessions of Law & Order: SVU, snowboarding, photography, spoiling our 3-year old yorkie-poodle Mokka and disagreeing over what music to listen to in the car. We’re planning a small winery wedding while incorporating some cultural elements into the day as a nod to our Chinese backgrounds.
In fact, they’re made for the bride and groom to walk under.
What in the world, Miss French Toast, are you talking about?
Fear not. I did not lose my (fashion) sense.
In the Chinese culture, it is believed that the order of weddings amongst the siblings should coincide with their birth order. Which means the eldest should get married first, then the middle child, and then the youngest should be the last to tie the knot. Of course, in this day and age, the likelihood of that happening gets slimmer and slimmer.
Mrs. French Toast, Pleasanton, CAAge and Occupation: 29, Marketing & PRFiance's Age and Occupation: IT geek by day, self-proclaimed handyman by nightEngagement Date: October 2009Wedding Date: March 2011Venue: Palm Event CenterAbout Me: I’m a city girl at heart who moved to the suburbs a year ago. Now I’m adjusting to life with a front lawn, nosy neighbors, cooking attempts, and making sure the garbage pail is pulled out on time every week! When I’m not traveling, Mr. FT and I enjoy marathon sessions of Law & Order: SVU, snowboarding, photography, spoiling our 3-year old yorkie-poodle Mokka and disagreeing over what music to listen to in the car. We’re planning a small winery wedding while incorporating some cultural elements into the day as a nod to our Chinese backgrounds.
Although we were able to wriggle ourselves out of a big fat Chinese wedding, Mr. French Toast and I will honor our Chinese roots with certain traditions of the culture by incorporating it into the planning, as well as the big day.
For starters, it was important that we choose an auspicious day for the wedding. In Chinese culture, when it comes to choosing a date, there are several routes to take:
1) Find a sifu (“master”—and no, not the Jackie Chan type of martial-arts master) in Hong Kong/China to choose it for us based on our birthdates, time of birth, zodiac sign, and our parents’ date of birth. I went to a wedding mall in Hong Kong that specializes in weddings, and one store quoted me HKD 600 (USD $78) to calculate a date for us based on the Chinese calendar.
Mrs. Sewing, San Mateo, CA/Honolulu, HIAge and Occupation: 24, Electrical EngineerFiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Electrical EngineerEngagement Date: June 27, 2009Wedding Date: July 2010Venue: Anela Garden Chapel & Japanese Cultural Center, HonoluluAbout Me: I'm an easily entertained, compulsive idea-scheming machine who loves good art, good food, and a good engineering challenge. I'm planning a half-destination wedding on the beautiful island of Oahu - imagine a plethora of movies, art and games; savory Hawaiian food; blended Chinese and Japanese cultural details; lush, fragrant tropical flowers and all the air conditioning a NorCal native could want! And once I marry the love of my life, we'll come back to the 'mainland' to party it up all over again in my hometown of Salinas, the salad-bowl capital of the world!
With a quick trip back to the dressing room, I unwound myself from the kimono and slipped on the red cheongsam I bought custom made from China. It was so much lighter than both the kimono and my wedding dress, so I left it on for the rest of the night. It also helped that the dress was a little loose—definitely a comfy thing to be in!
Mrs. Sewing, San Mateo, CA/Honolulu, HIAge and Occupation: 24, Electrical EngineerFiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Electrical EngineerEngagement Date: June 27, 2009Wedding Date: July 2010Venue: Anela Garden Chapel & Japanese Cultural Center, HonoluluAbout Me: I'm an easily entertained, compulsive idea-scheming machine who loves good art, good food, and a good engineering challenge. I'm planning a half-destination wedding on the beautiful island of Oahu - imagine a plethora of movies, art and games; savory Hawaiian food; blended Chinese and Japanese cultural details; lush, fragrant tropical flowers and all the air conditioning a NorCal native could want! And once I marry the love of my life, we'll come back to the 'mainland' to party it up all over again in my hometown of Salinas, the salad-bowl capital of the world!
Tucked away in the dressing room, Kimono Dresser H, a troupe of Polynesian dancers, and I began the changing process. Yes, I was really worried about the dancers’ next-door party at first, but either we were louder or the soundproofing was good because I couldn’t even tell they were there.
Mrs. Eggplant, San FranciscoAge and Occupation: 28, Human ResourcesFiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Associate Marketing ManagerEngagement Date: January 19, 2007Wedding Date: October 20, 2007Blogging Since: May 31, 2007Venue: Ceremony at a cement and stained glass cathedral and reception at a boutique hotel ballroomAbout Me: I'm a shopping junkie who lives to discover great deals and a craft addict that loves to scrapbook and knit. My profile picture was taken on the day I got engaged which is why my smile is so huge!
I liked this post because I learned so much about Chinese traditions through the Chinese cookie party tradition. Weddings are as much about joining families as they are about the couple. Respecting and honoring traditions of the past, no matter how strange they may seem to us today, is a way to honor our families, too.
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I wouldn’t consider myself traditionally Chinese in the cultural sense. My Cantonese is at the same level of a three-year-old and my family doesn’t really celebrate any of the Chinese holidays, the Lunar New Year included. But when it came to my wedding, my mom insisted on going through the whole shebang of Cantonese wedding traditions.
This weekend, my family threw me what Cantonese people call a “cookie party.” The tradition goes something like this: Read more…
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