Weddingbee Blog

Last weekend, Mr. Sunbeam and I went for our first private dance lesson. When we handed over our music to our instructor, we still hadn’t chosen a song for our first dance. It’s a tall order for a song to be romantic, yet modern, yet everything you’d ever want it to be for your first dance. So we let the instructor listen to all three and he told us the recommended dance moves for each. Here were the contenders:

Lady’s House by Iron and Wine - Dance move: rumba

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This brings a whole new meaning to “dancing in the aisles”, don’t you think?

The Dude and I have known a couple things regarding our wedding reception from the beginning: 1) we want everyone to dance like crazy and have a great time, and 2) we don’t want to play “typical” wedding dance music. You know, the kind of music that middle-aged white people dance to? Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. The YMCA. Celebrate. The Hustle. Anything resembling ’80s hair metal. I know it gets people on the dance floor, but I Just. Can’t. Do it.

Instead, I’ve been trolling through our CD collection over the past few weeks, picking out some potential alternative dance song gems. My ultimate goal is a list of poppy, indie songs-with-a-beat, that are danceable enough so that people who have never heard them will want to get out there and boogie. Throw in a splash of Top 40 hip-hop (I like Kanye and T.I.), a classic Prince song or two, and some Electric Light Orchestra for the Dude, and we’ve got ourselves a party!

We can do our best to select cool music, but we can’t help it if people dance like this.

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I know I’m not the only one who was shaken up by yesterday’s news that Michael Jackson had suddenly passed away. I remember sneaking into my older brother’s closet when I was little and discovering his instructional booklet on how to moonwalk, which I thought was just about the coolest thing ever (that was before I discovered layering neon socks). Despite my love for M.J., I’ve always been a little bit terrified of the Thriller video, but this past Halloween I faced my fears (and dancing phobia) and learned part of the Thriller dance for our friend’s wedding. My friends and I persuaded the entire wedding party to surprise the happy couple with a dance routine, but once we actually started practicing in living rooms, the enthusiasm died down and we were left with only four of us (including Mr. Candy Corn, who so graciously volunteered to take on the role of Michael). I even found a Thriller-riffic jacket from Target that I styled with some black duct tape to add that extra touch to our “performance”. We had our friend and fellow bridal party member videotape the dance, but unfortunately he hit the wrong button and managed to leave us without any blackmail in the form of a YouTube video.

We practiced in the basement of the mansion one last time before heading to the tent and surprising everyone with our zombie moves. Right about now is when I was wishing we had invested in a fog machine to make us look a little less… uhm… sad.
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News flash… the Mascaras are not good dancers. I danced for seven years waaaay back when, but I definitely didn’t retain much and now I feel ridiculous trying to dance. Mr. M is just… not good either. We have this weird fear of doing the high school sway while everyone is watching us dance for the first time as Mr. and Mrs. I mean, it will be our first dance as a married couple, so it should be done right, don’t you think? We’ve been talking about getting lessons since we first got engaged, and we finally found a ballroom dance studio this past week. We had our introductory lesson and really enjoyed it!

We learned the very very basic steps of the rumba, foxtrot, waltz, and the hustle. We very quickly decided that we were not fans of the hustle. The rest were enjoyable, though. I kind of like using the whole floor in the foxtrot! Our instructor was a fun guy and was pretty outgoing, which is just what we needed to break out of our shells a bit (we are engineers, after all). He did a lot of the “BAM”, “BOOM”, “POW” business (apparently channeling his inner Black Eyed Peas?) but we’ll forgive him for that.

At the end of the lesson, while we definitely didn’t feel as though we were ready for the real deal, we at least had the confidence that we are capable of pulling it off.
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This past Thursday, Papa Frenchie and I went to our first dance lesson. Papa Frenchie didn’t really dance at his own wedding, so Mama Frenchie still can’t believe taking dance lessons was his idea. My job was to find the studio, and since I only knew of two in our area (Londance and Arthur Murray) I called the closest one, Londance. Pat (one of the owners) set us up with a free trial lesson to see how we liked everything and for us to decide if we’d want to take more lessons.

Photo by Me. Sorry it’s dark :-/

Papa Frenchie and I had NO CLUE what our song would be going into this lesson; we just figured we would pick something we could dance to.
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What a ridiculously hectic weekend!!! I baked the last batch of macarons, my sister flew in for my (last minute) bachelorette party, and we organized and assembled all the paper goods and items to take down to our venue. Oh yeah, we also squeezed in a dance lesson!

So, after reading Miss Yorkie’s post on her dance lessons, I panicked and realized that I had forgotten to schedule lessons. Well, at this stage in the game, that means one (singular) lesson. Ha!!

I pick up choreography and dance very quickly, because, well, I spent the better part of my life in ballet and jazz classes. The problem is, when Mr. P and I dance together, I usually lead… for example, I dip myself:

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Who says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks? Remember that last item on my list of things to do? Well, Mr. Yorkie and I have finally gotten around to doing something about it!

Despite my Cuban heritage, I was totally skipped over when it came to distribution of the rhythm gene. I’ve never felt comfortable out on the dance floor, and for that reason have always sat out on the sidelines at every wedding I’ve ever been to. My biggest fear since we got engaged has been that our first dance will look more like a scene from some middle school spring fling, with us standing in place, awkwardly shuffling our feet from side to side. (That’s the one move that I unfortunately have mastered!)
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It started out completely unplanned. It involved cooking dinner in our new kitchen, one glass of wine, two handfuls of sage from our greenhouse, and Neil Young playing on the stereo. The song Harvest Moon came on and we started dancing a little, the harmonica sailing away in the background. We started thinking that this could be our first dance song. We both love it, the lyrics make me sigh, and it’s easy enough to sway around to for three-and-a-half minutes or so. And it’s the kind of song that makes me want to get lost in Mr. CB’s eyes forever.

After a couple more minutes of both of us crooning in the kitchen, I started wondering, ‘When is the full moon around our wedding date, anyway?’ I pulled out my CrackBerry and got to work. The first calendar pulled up a full black circle over our date with a full grey circle over a few other dates. “I think it’s the full moon,” I said, “Oh, no, wait. Maybe it’s no moon.”

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Why, you ask, will the Stilettos be doing some middle school dancing? This Stiletto isn’t so much of a dancer, sadly. It seems fitting, really, considering the scope of our relationship. Mr. S and I actually have a definite role reversal in many aspects of our relationship. He’s a fanatical cleaner (seriously, I’ve never cleaned the bathroom since we’ve lived together), a great cook, and always seems to know when we’re running low on the essentials like toilet paper and hand soap. If it were left to me, we’d be running to the store in a panic as each of these items ran out. I’m a much more laid back member of the household, and tend to be the one leaving shoes out and not seeing the reason for making the bed in the morning (seriously, aren’t we just going to mess it up again?!).

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes - dancing. The stereotype seems to be that women are usually better dancers and the guys struggle with no rhythm and generally avoid the dance floor. I, sadly, am the wallflower of our duo. Mr. S has natural confidence on the dance floor and is just so darn cute. In recent years, I’ve finally started going out onto the dance floor, but I need a good dose of vodka tonic to really get me going. And, let’s be honest, I probably look like a ridiculous fool… but I’ve had to make my peace with that.

So, for the first dance, I’m not anticipating any fancy twirls or big dips. I’m thinking more along the lines of my hands on his shoulders, his hands on my hips, and some awkward swaying back and forth.
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This is quite possibly the perfect first dance.

What makes a first dance memorable to you?

I had an interesting dilemma facing me with who would take the job of walking me down the aisle. My real father lives in California and I’ve never really had a relationship with him. My stepfather, who I considered the closest thing I ever had to a real father, died when I was 14. My parents divorced when I was very young and my stepfather helped raise me. I called him Dad and never thought more of it.

Once I became engaged, one of the first things that popped into my mind was missing out on the father-daughter events like walking down the aisle, being given away, and having a dance just for us. I had already gone through high school and college graduations, and sorority daddy-daughter days without one. Who would take over this important role for me? Would I end up walking the aisle alone?

I thought about my grandfather, but as soon as I mentioned it to my mom (who knew it was coming already), she broke some bad news to me. My grandpa had already declined because he’s been suffering from dizzy spells and didn’t want to have an attack while halfway down the aisle, thus ruining our big day. I honestly wasn’t worried that it would happen or that if it did it would matter much to me, but mom assured me he would say no, regardless.

I was back at square one.
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Yep. That was the name of a mixed CD I came across while house-sitting recently. Sappy Love Songs. Mr. Cowboy Boot and I were cooking dinner at this gorgeous house when I was sifting through the house owner’s CD collection. Since we haven’t decided on any of our song choices yet for the wedding, I thought, ’Perfect, let’s give it a whirl and possibly, find a first dance song. Maybe we’ll be inspired? Or maybe we’ll hear something unexpected that will fit in perfectly?’

(source)

We love music and are thinking we’d like to hire a bluegrass band to play the wedding. Some of these songs would sound so awesome bluegrass-style. We’re both really drawn to the Pink Floyd song Wish You Were Here, but there’s something so sad about the line “We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl”.

We have a lot to plan out: ceremony songs, what to play during our cocktail hour, our first dance, any other important moments. Whew—it’s a bit overwhelming.
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At Sister Bruschetta’s wedding, Stevie Wonder crooned as Daddy Bruschetta swayed and spun his firstborn around the dance floor. I didn’t realize it at the time, but that evening, a Bruschetta family wedding tradition began.

Although the song was released a few years before Sister Bruschetta was born, “Isn’t She Lovely” maintained its popularity into the early 80s. Inspired by the idea of a father-daughter dance song that recalls the bride’s childhood, I set out to find a birth year ballad.

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I saw my Dad over the weekend and he said he had a great idea for the Father - Daughter dance. I have to admit, I felt like his choice of song would be so bad it might make me cry (not really). Maybe a little Englebert Humperdinck? Yes, I remember a time in the ’80s where my Dad listened to him a lot and my sister and I would hide from embarrassment in our own house.

But it wasn’t Mr. Humperdinck he longed to boogie to. Then I thought it would be something a little more Sri-Lankan. Perhaps this?
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