Miss Turkey, PhiladelphiaAge and Occupation: 29, Brand ManagementFiance's Age and Occupation: 28, ConsultantEngagement Date: February 2011Wedding Date: May 2012Venue: The Rittenhouse HotelAbout Me: I'm a marketer who loves a good glass of wine, anything pumpkin-flavored, every crime drama on TV and, of course, Mr. Turkey. It's funny to say out loud, but we're former coworkers turned betrothed---now planning a wedding in the city of Brotherly Love. For three years, we've been eating our way through Philadelphia, playing tourist at home, and cheering for every sports team in the 215. Although we've hit some unplanned snags along the way, we're determined to have a rocking party this spring with our loud, fun families and friends.
I don’t know about you all, but the guest list was probably the hardest part of planning our wedding thus far. Honestly, aside from that (well, and the venue change), wedding planning has been pretty fun. I couldn’t really understand why people found themselves so stressed.
Ha. And then HA again when I think about how I’ll probably feel in 3ish months.
Anyhow, back to the guest list. Today I’m going to talk about one particular issue we debated when making our list and checking it twice. That is, the issue of inviting people to your wedding after they’ve invited you to theirs.
I’ve mentioned we’ve attended a lot of weddings together. You might vaguely remember that I once posted about that and think, hmm…was it really that many?
A snapshot of some of the weddings we’ve attended together
Only 4 of these dresses featured have been re-worn (I have a problem)
In three years together, Mr. Turkey and I have attended 32 weddings. That means, if we invited each and every one of these couples, they would account for 64 of our 200ish guests. Read more…
Miss Eagle, Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Age and Occupation: 22, Medical Sciences Graduate Student / Science Instructor Fiancee's Age and Occupation: 23, NurseEngagement Date: April 2011Wedding Date: August 2012Venue: Historic Lougheed HouseAbout Me: I'm a science-geek graduate student who is studying craniofacial malformations and evolutionary developmental biology. I have a passion for DIY crafts, amazing red wine, and all-things-wedding. Together with my wonderful fiancée, we are planning a formal black tie wedding filled with DIY projects and vintage decor. When I'm not reading about science-y things or wedding blogs, I enjoy teaching science-y things to kids and trying to be Martha Stewart incarnate.
Making the guest list is seriously the hardest part of wedding planning. Well, I found it to be difficult, probably because we have a venue maximum of 96 including us, our DOC and our photographer. First, we agreed that we would split the number of guests down the middle. It just makes it easier that way. However, I wanted to follow guest list “rules” like we would only invite our “immediate families”: parents/siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins… and our friends, obviously. But, that didn’t work out.
My “immediate family” is a bit bigger than Fiancee Eagle’s. Read more…
Miss Coyote, Westchester, NYAge and Occupation: 26, Administrative AssistantFiance's Age and Occupation: 30, Computer ProgrammerEngagement Date: August 2010Wedding Date: June 2012Venue: Franklin PlazaAbout Me: I am an overly-caffeinated, sports-obsessed history nerd who loves a good book and hates bananas. Originally from a small town in Upstate NY, I made the move to Westchester County and never looked back! My loves include NBC Thursdays, red wine, fleece pajamas, and my amazing fiancé. Together we are planning a formal evening affair for 175 guests with a mix of new and old traditions and plenty of personal touches.
OK, I promise you that we will talk about some actual wedding planning.
The morning after our celebratory dinner debacle, I awoke to find my father reviewing a spreadsheet on his laptop. This is actually pretty normal behavior and I’ve learned that one of the many things I have in common with my dad is our obsession with spreadsheets.
I’ve also learned that spreadsheets are irreplaceable when it comes to wedding planning. Oh, and beer. I’ve pretty much decided that all of life’s problems can be solved with an impeccable spreadsheet and a tasty beer.
Mrs. Raccoon, IndianapolisAge and Occupation: 22, StudentFiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Graduate StudentEngagement Date: Christmas 2010Wedding Date: January 2012Venue: Catholic Church, Chateau Thomas WineryAbout Me: I'm a wholesome Midwestern girl, TV series junkie, professional shower singer, and Anglophile. I love my fiance, crock pot cooking, my cat Heepo, going for the gusto, and all things wedding. Mr. Raccoon is pretty sweet, too! He’s a mad scientist that loves to travel. We met my first night on campus and have been inseparable since.
I know there are computer programs and online services for this, but my low tech technique has been highly successful for us so far! How low tech? I’m talking poster board and book stickies with names written on them. I know my poorly scaled design isn’t beautiful, but it is so, so easy to work with and rearrange.
If you’re kind of lost about where to start, I clumped our attending RSVPs into groups.
Miss Aardvark, Beaver Dam, WIAge and Occupation: 23, Assistant Product ManagerFiance's Age and Occupation: 31, Business Analyst Engagement Date: May 28th, 2011Wedding Date: April 2012Venue: St. Philip Catholic Church/Arcadia Brewing Co.About Me: I am a resourceful lady who love surprises and adventure. At the same time, I value traditions, family and friends. I like to make crafty messes, sometimes, clean them up, and do pretty much anything outdoors. The Mister and I are pretty avid cyclists---we have nine bikes in our home right now...and one motorcycle! We both enjoy eating food we can't pronounce (language doesn't really matter) and going places we've never been. We currently reside in rural Wisconsin, enjoying the cheese and beer it has to offer, and getting outside whenever we can!
No, this is not a post about horrendous invasions of personal space. This is about having a seating chart. Or not.
We spent Christmas at my family’s and I really tried to keep wedding talk to a minimum, however I could not pass up a chance with most of the major players present to ask: Seating chart? Yes or no? I personally had very mixed feeling on a chart. I know it is the “polite” thing to do so your guests aren’t wandering around like confused sheep, or (more likely) stuck next to people they don’t know and forced to make awkward conversation with because they came in late. On top of that, I really like the idea of fun, beautiful table numbers and seating cards.
On the flip side, we are celebrating in a brewery, not a ballroom. It is a casual atmosphere and people would hopefully be able to figure out a place to sit. The other bonus of this plan is that it saves me from having to make said table numbers and seating charts because, as beautiful as they can be, I have a feeling they will have a high PIA factor.
All of that considered, I was on the fence. Read more…
Miss Hawk, Richmond, VAAge and Occupation: 26, FinanceFiance's Age and Occupation: 30, District SupervisorEngagement Date: March 13, 2011Wedding Date: May 2012Venue: The Chapel of the Sir Christopher Wren Building, 2007 Legacy HallAbout Me: I’m an Arizona-born girl who has spent the majority of my life living below the Mason-Dixon line. The South has definitely earned a special place in my heart (alongside my Virginia born and bred fiance, of course!). We are planning a traditional Christian ceremony at my alma mater in historic Williamsburg, Virginia, followed by a rocking reception filled with Southern cooking and vintage/shabby chic details. When we’re not wedding planning, we enjoy spending time with our three dogs, going for runs together, watching plenty of football (or baseball depending on the season), and sampling new wine.
Pretty early on Mr. Hawk and I knew that we wanted to have a smaller wedding, surrounded by our closest family and friends. The thought of being introduced to some distant second cousin twice removed at the reception just didn’t feel right to me. We decided to keep it as small as possible for such an intimate occasion; however, not unfortunately for us but unfortunately for our guest list, our families alone could easily exceed the 120-guest max mandated by Wren Chapel. Actually, let me clarify—Mr. Hawk’s family alone could easily exceed 120 people. (FMIL has over 10 siblings, so with their children and grandbabies, well, you can do the math ’cause my head just started hurting.)
We knew we had to draw the line somewhere if we were even going to have room for friends (and maybe some of my family members). So we decided to have an adults-only ceremony and reception. Now, I know that the idea is still considered somewhat controversial, but like I said we had to draw the line somewhere…
Miss Dalmatian, Nashville, TNAge and Occupation: 23, Pediatric NurseFiance's Age and Occupation: 23, Computer Engineer and Entrepreneur Engagement Date: April 13, 2011Wedding Date: May 2012Venue: Historic CedarwoodAbout Me: I am a Northern girl from Chicago who is planning a wedding filled with Southern charm in Nashville, Tennessee. I love dogs, the White Sox, Full House reruns, and anything with ruffles on it. Mr. Dalmatian is my computer-genius problem-solving fiance who is constantly teaching me new things and making me a better person. We live with our adopted pup Echo, who is very excited that his parents are getting married!
A few weeks ago I emailed our photographer with a quick question about our engagement photos. This was not an urgent question (we are not taking our engagement pictures until March, mind you). I purposely sent the email in October, however, because I knew that our super adorable preggo photographer was due to have her twins in November, and I figured I would get my question out of the way before her life became exponentially more crazy (and cute!).
So, I sent my email at 3:13 p.m. She wrote me back at 11:04 the next morning. I read the first line of her response, which read “I’m so sorry for the delay in response.” I thought that this was very nice, although not necessary (read: it had literally not even been 24 hours). Then I continued to read her explanation and learned that she had had her babies and was still in the hospital! I immediately wrote back, expressing my congratulations and telling her not to worry about responding back to me.
Miss Doe, Northern CaliforniaAge and Occupation: 24, Real Estate AssistantFiance's Age and Occupation: 23, Recycling ManagerEngagement Date: December 25, 2010Wedding Date: May 2012Venue: Monte Verde InnAbout Me: I’m a Rat Pack fan and a Christmas nut that loves to read, good wine, cheesy ’80s movies and ’90s sitcoms. My wiener dog with an attitude problem and lazy basset hound are my constant source of entertainment. He's a hunter and I like cooking so it's not rare to see wild game on our dinner menu. Both of us were born and raised in a small historic farming town where our feet are still firmly planted. We have been together for nearly a decade and have shared many life experiences together, including birthdays that are only one day apart. We are two old souls that are creating our long-awaited wedding with loads of tradition that blends our two styles into rustic elegance in the foothills of Northern California.
I know we sent our save the dates out ages ago, but I never did talk about the dreaded guest list. I say dreaded, because I think you all can commiserate with me on this one.
When we sat down to get started on the guest list, I was so excited. I didn’t think it would take longer than an hour or so to get some names together of everyone we know. What a naive little bride that I was. Apparently, guest lists aren’t always that easy.
Remember the invitations scene from Father of the Bride? I think we all can relate to feeling this way when the reality sets in that weddings are expensive and you know way too many people.
Miss Fox, Washington DC/Havre de Grace, MDAge and Occupation: 26, Massage TherapistFiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Field Support EngineerEngagement Date: April 18, 2010Wedding Date: June 2012Venue: Vandiver InnAbout Me: I’m a dancer turned massage therapist who was born and raised in New York. Alas, true love has brought me “south” where I still maintain my penchants for pretty shoes, wine, crossword puzzles, cherry blossoms, and the Mets. I own more sunglasses than a normal person should and don’t eat red meat (though I make up for it by eating my weight in sushi). I tend to be a big planner who likes to get things started early, but generally end up being indecisive and procrastinating when it comes down to it. I have a (not so) secret crush on Chris Carrabba, but my loyalty and love ultimately goes to the future hubs, of course! Together, my Foxy man and I love to discuss (read: debate) politics and current events, have Mario Kart and Scrabble duels, and just laugh. A lot. We’re hoping and planning for a laid back, fun, summery, rustic vibe to our June wedding that will be genuinely “us” – that is, if we finally make some decisions. Huzzah!
You know those little sponge pills that you stick in a cup of water and they expand to be a huge dinosaur?
That doesn’t really look like a dinosaur. Regardless. You get the idea. (Image via Alibaba.com)
That? Has happened to our guest list.
I thought it could never happen to us. Not me, no way, no how. I’m a loser, I don’t know that many people, I have a small family. If anything, we’d hit well under the 100-person mark that we have been basing cost points off of.
Mrs. Magic, Chapel Hill, NCAge and Occupation: 30, Licensed Clinical Social WorkerFiance's Age and Occupation: 30, ResearcherEngagement Date: December 1, 2009Wedding Date: October 2011Venue: Barn at ValhallaAbout Me: I’m a tall drink of water (5’10”!) and a Southern bride with an enormous appetite for Mexican food, good deals, anything French, and all things wedding! By day I am lucky enough to work with individuals with autism and their families. By night, I’m even luckier to be able to spend time hanging out with awesome friends, crafting, shopping, thinking about exercising, and kicking it with Mr. Magic and our two cats. I tend to have sudden, intense cravings that will not be denied (seafood enchiladas! new jeans!) and I’m prone to being a disorganized mess of anxiety and stress. After waiting (and waiting!) to get engaged, I am finally planning the colorful, fun, fabulously awesome Fall wedding of our dreams. In an effort to share the fun and craziness that is wedding planning, I’m gonna blog about it for y’all---the good, the bad, and the pretty!
personal photo taken on iPhone…sorry…one day, I will have a real adult camera…
OK, here’s how you do it! I did this in a really haphazard order, because I am losing my mind. But you are probably more organized and can figure out the most logical way to follow these steps.
Ms. Gazelle, Calgary/VancouverAge and Occupation: 32, EngineerFiance's Age and Occupation: 32, Technology AnalystEngagement Date: September 3, 2010Wedding Date: July 2011Venue: Brock House Restaurant, VancouverAbout Me: I am a marathon runner, cyclist, Ironman triathlete and beautiful shoe fiend who also loves kicking back and watching Glee. I grew up a bit of a nomad as I traveled around the world with my family, living everywhere from Australia to England to South America and Indonesia. I finally settled in Calgary a few years ago and met Mr. Gazelle who loves me even though we cheer for different hockey teams. We are planning a bit of a destination wedding in beautiful Vancouver, British Columbia and we can’t wait to share the day with our close family and friends.
In conjunction with our personalized menus I wanted to create a seating chart to let our guests know which table they would be sitting at.
You may remember that we decided to letter our tables instead of numbering them and we spelled out “Me & You.” We had a friend take pictures of us holding the letters that would be a part of the table centerpieces.
I also had a frame that I had purchased from Pottery Barn years ago. I had originally wanted to peel the labels off of wine bottles and put them in a frame. When I found the peeling of labels trickier than expected the frame sat sad and unfinished for five years. Read more…
Ms. Gazelle, Calgary/VancouverAge and Occupation: 32, EngineerFiance's Age and Occupation: 32, Technology AnalystEngagement Date: September 3, 2010Wedding Date: July 2011Venue: Brock House Restaurant, VancouverAbout Me: I am a marathon runner, cyclist, Ironman triathlete and beautiful shoe fiend who also loves kicking back and watching Glee. I grew up a bit of a nomad as I traveled around the world with my family, living everywhere from Australia to England to South America and Indonesia. I finally settled in Calgary a few years ago and met Mr. Gazelle who loves me even though we cheer for different hockey teams. We are planning a bit of a destination wedding in beautiful Vancouver, British Columbia and we can’t wait to share the day with our close family and friends.
Mr. Gazelle and I talked about all kinds of seating options for the wedding. We contemplated designating tables for our parents but then leaving the seating for everyone else open. I then had visions of friends or family not being able to sit together if they weren’t on the ball about picking seats. I figured they wouldn’t be too happy about that. Coming up with a seating plan is one of the trickiest things in the end stages of wedding planning. I quickly realized that while we maybe couldn’t make everyone happy it would be better in the long run to let everyone know where they were sitting.
So…what would be the best way to tell everyone? I wasn’t feeling creative on designing escort cards. Instead I decided personalized menus would be the way to go! This way our guests would know what yumminess was waiting for them at the buffet and it would also let our gluten free guests know that we had special meals for them.
I picked up a few more sheets of the same gorgeous sparkly white paper that we used for our invitations from Paper Circle and some purple card stock from Michaels. I printed the menus off on our laser jet printer at home and assembled them one weekend with the help of my girlfriends.
Miss Porcupine, NYC/Lancaster, PAAge and Occupation: 26, Sales Coordinator/PublishingFiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Assistant Manager/SalesEngagement Date: August 8, 2010Wedding Date: March 2012Venue: Riverdale ManorAbout Me: I'm a born and bred New Yorker with a love/hate relationship for the city I have always called home. Although I may seem quiet from afar, I have a loud personality once you get to know me. I am a book nerd at heart, but love a night out in the city with good friends. I have a serious addiction to all things cheese, chocolate, cardigans, Mexican food, and reality TV. The future hubs and I met in college, settled in New York, and decided to go with a rustic/peacock infused wedding in Lancaster, PA, right near his hometown. Come the big day, we will be together 5 years, and we're looking forward to making it official!
Just when I thought it was over…the guest-list monster has returned.
When I first created our guest list it seemed like a painfully daunting task. Not going to lie: it really was. My mother, ever so old-fashioned, decided it was easier for her to HAND WRITE the list. On top of this, there were some spelling mishaps and a few incomplete addresses. After I ironed those out, typed the list up, and looked sadly at my design of the spreadsheet, I started copy/pasting Mr. Porcupine’s guests into it as well. His mother had sent me her list in Word, and it wasn’t flowing right with the Excel grid from hell I had created. I should have stopped right there and reformatted the whole darn thing. But instead I like to dig myself into ditches. Read more…
Miss Warbler, Long Beach/MalibuAge and Occupation: 24, Quality Assurance EditorFiance's Age and Occupation: 32, Handheld AdministratorEngagement Date: December 7, 2010Wedding Date: April 2012Venue: Calamigos Ranch MalibuAbout Me: I’m a Korean BBQ loving, cheesecake enthusiast bride living in the LBC! By day I write and edit for an online search engine marketing company. By night I am a volunteer food taster of all that is delicious. I am fortunate to be marrying an amazing man who loves me and my quirky ways. I love food, books, indie music, and Harry Potter. We are planning a small, intimate wedding up in the Malibu Hills with our closest family and friends. With the help of my wonderful fiance, our loved ones, and red velvet cheesecake, our wedding will be glorious!
When Mr. Warbs and I started planning for the wedding, we agreed on a couple of things right off the bat. First, we decided to limit the guest list to 50 people. Weddings of 200–300 guests are great, but I have no idea how you are supposed to spend time with all of your guests. Besides, I don’t even know 200 people. Second, we decided that, other than my nieces and adorable nephew, we will be having an adult reception.
Miss Porcupine, NYC/Lancaster, PAAge and Occupation: 26, Sales Coordinator/PublishingFiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Assistant Manager/SalesEngagement Date: August 8, 2010Wedding Date: March 2012Venue: Riverdale ManorAbout Me: I'm a born and bred New Yorker with a love/hate relationship for the city I have always called home. Although I may seem quiet from afar, I have a loud personality once you get to know me. I am a book nerd at heart, but love a night out in the city with good friends. I have a serious addiction to all things cheese, chocolate, cardigans, Mexican food, and reality TV. The future hubs and I met in college, settled in New York, and decided to go with a rustic/peacock infused wedding in Lancaster, PA, right near his hometown. Come the big day, we will be together 5 years, and we're looking forward to making it official!
Creating a guest list was one of the most annoying of all wedding-related tasks. I started it, got bored, edited it, tried to finish it, started it over, stopped, and then ended up working off the first one again. Finally, I made some progress one random boring evening.
Image via Glamour / Artwork on it designed by yours truly
All-Inclusion Invitation Suites
