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Weddingbee Blog
Tomorrow I’m headed home on a whirlwind weekend trip to Chicago for my cousin’s schmancy wedding at the Ritz Carlton! I think I’ve mentioned before that I’ve not been to more than a handful of weddings in my day, and most of them were uber-budgety (and lovely) affairs… so the idea of attending a platinum wedding is very exciting to me.
The bride comes from a huge Italian family, and she’s had to fight to limit her guest list because her dad would like for it to be over 300 guests. I wonder how many people one must invite to end up with a party of 300 people?
We’ve been in the process of finalizing our own guest list, as we’re nearing time to distribute invitations (eeeep!), and we’re completely at a loss for anticipating the actual attendance vs. the amount of people we invite. It’s generally a leap of faith, it seems.
We’re hoping to keep the head count to 105, per our arrangement with The Bungalow Club. Family is all included by default, but deciding who to invite and who to leave out among friends is a decidedly un-fun, yet sadly necessary part of wedding planning. Right now our invite list consists of about 180 folks. I’d heard of creating a ’likelihood to attend report’, in which you rate each guest’s likelihood to attend by assigning them a percentage, and then you average those percentages out by dividing this number by the number of invitees.
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Originally, we had 4 people on each side of the bridal party. Now, not so much.
The other night, Mr. Meatball’s best friend and “homey of honor” in our wedding, El, called to share the news that he had been cast in a very exciting and promising off-Broadway version of Neil Gaiman’s book (and now movie), Coraline. We are so proud of him and were totally thrilled to hear it. But, he said, the director wouldn’t allow him to miss a performance to be in our wedding. Not one. No. Bueno.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen Mr. Meatball more devastated. Young boys don’t dream much about their wedding day, but ever since he was a young boy, Mr. Meatball looked forward to the day his best friend stood next to him at his wedding. This is his duuuuude. You know what I mean. Every high school story begins with, “this one time, me and El….”
The look on my poor man’s face was enough to break a nation’s worth of hearts. Of course, it couldn’t be helped. Of course, we 100% support El in this incredible opportunity and are beyond happy for him. But of course, having a best friend miss out on standing next to Mr. Meatball - or more so, having Mr. Meatball miss out on his best friend being there, is a difficult letdown to reconcile.
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I was tested this week. I’m hanging in there, but it’s been a rough go.
My job situation has devolved into a very unfair and uncomfortable situation, which put a major strain on my emotions and sapped my energy last weekend. Basically, they hired me on for a low-skill and equally low-pay job, and immediately shepherded me into a higher skill position at the same hourly rate. It feels a lot like a bait and switch. I stood up for myself, but there’s not much I can do. I can’t quit, as I can’t afford it. It’s a catch 22.
The moment things got stressful, I immediately started to feel the old patterns creep in. I spent 2 nights overeating. It started out innocently - a little sugary cereal here, a low-fat brownie there, but it quickly spiraled into an unhealthy, frantic, “binge-y” feeling that I know all too well.
The timing corresponded with Tiger being out of town, so I had a 4-day lag between workouts. I should have picked myself up and Shredded or something, but instead I stewed in my juices, ate, and felt lazy, helpless and frustrated.
The good news is, this time I realized early on how destructive it was. How it wasn’t comforting or cozy. Not even a little. It made me feel bloated and uncomfortable, and embarrassed and tired - but it also strengthened my resolve to fight.
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I’ve received a few comments/emails about how much people are enjoying my healthy recipes (aww, shucks) and requesting more, and who am I to deny the people what they want, nay, deserve?
So, today I’m going to share a few of my recent favorites for the budget bride with a yen to whittle her waistline. And away we go!
Mushroom Stroganoff (and keep it off!)
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Ahhh, the 2-month mark. And as I write this, I am exactly 3 months from the wedding - eeeep!
This week has been a breeze. I actually feel kind of guilty about how easy it’s been. I’m in a great routine of working out 3 times a week, looking forward to it, and feeling amazing afterward. I’ve been feeling so much strength in the diet department - and even when I slip up, I forgive and move on, making sure to even it out by eating lighter the next day, or toss in some extra cardio. I’ve been giving myself a bit more leeway on the weekends, which keeps me from feeling deprived, but honestly, I’m pulled more toward healthy options and have less interest in the naughty stuff. Best of all? I’m slimmer, straighter, and stronger than I’ve been since grad school!
I gots ta keep it real, though. If it weren’t for my personal trainer, I wouldn’t be nearly as successful. I might even be heavier, due to the stress I’m under lately. I simply lack the motivation, skill, knowledge and tools to keep myself going, make my workouts pack as much punch, and keep variety involved so I’m not bored. Plus, she’s the ultimate accountability buddy. If I don’t show, if I don’t push myself, I’m wasting her time as well as mine.
I know trainers are a huge expense… but there are lots of ways to work one into your life, regardless of your budget.
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Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
Holy moly, y’all I lost 6 pounds! HooodeyHoooo!
I’m also quite pleased to report that my dress fitting was MAGICAL. When I tried on the sample last May, it was like squeezing a sausage into a casing. I was spilling out all over the place. No bueno. But Saturday, it went on like a glove! I was so thrilled, because it’s very difficult to keep perspective of my body from one week to the next, let alone from May 2008 to February 09! I still love my dress beyond expression, and can’t quite believe that it’s being built as I type!
While I looked much better in the dress, seeing my bare areas really helped kick in my “now or never” instinct about getting SSS (slim, straight and strong) before May. It was just the added pressure I needed, and when mixed with the confidence boost I got from trying on the sample again, I’ve been really feeling in charge of my body and loving it.
The Workouts:
Tues, Thurs, Mon - sessions with Tiger, my fitness goddess.
I can’t even express what a relief it is to have booked the venue for our rehearsal dinner! It’s been a long haul, brotha’man.
Okay, well maybe we’re partly to blame for having difficult criteria. We wanted a spot that was unique to the LA area, which ruled out easy choices such as Maggiano’s or Bucca di Beppo. We definitely wanted a private room, since we’re anticipating 30-45 guests and wanted space to be together and not worry about noise. We wanted it to be relatively close to the hotel, so our guests wouldn’t have to navigate the nightmare roads of LA too far to find us. Lastly, we wanted to keep the cost to a very reasonable number, while still providing dinner and drinks to our out-of-town guests. However, finding a space that accommodated all that criteria was starting to feel like a pipe dream after months of seeking the perfect location!
We looked seriously at a couple of options:
Miceli’s is an adorable old school pizza/pasta restaurant within walking distance of the hotel, with ambiance like crazy, including chianti bottles dangling from the ceiling. Since we heart pizza like it’s life-blood, and they have a basement room, it seemed a perfect choice. Unfortunately, their $30+ per person pizza/pasta buffet didn’t include drinks, and that was decidedly not perfect.
I have a question. How do you time out your processional music, if using popular tunes?
I mean, as it stands, we’re thinking of using one song for the bridal party/families, and another song for my grand entrance.
Our aisle is probably all of 20 seconds long to walk.
So, how does it work? Do we fade it out when it’s time to switch tunes, and then fade it out again after I reach the altar? Do we genetically alter the songs to be xx minutes long? But then, what about the fact that my walk is only going to last all of 30 seconds of a 4 minute song? Should I just suck it up and do one song for the whole thing, so my song doesn’t seem so… piddly?
Tell me, wise ones. How do/did you do it?
…..was on TV on Thursday!
Check it out - I edited this to exactly his scene. Look for his handsome, hand-crafted afro-puff (courtesy of moi!). I’m so proud of him… I could just burst!
It’s fascinating how accomplishments for one of us, become pride-filled events for both of us. It reminds me that relationships (and especially marriage) are a melding of much more than hearts, homes, families and material belongings. They are a merging of the spirit, of identity, of intention, and soul. When he succeeds, I succeed. When I am raised up by joy, he feels it just as strongly. Or in times of disappointment, we share the burden equally.
We brave forth into the world for common goals, and even if we shared little interest in each other’s passions - we’d still be equally invested in their outcomes together. It somehow goes beyond teamwork, in my mind. Actually, there are times I find myself more inclined to help him than myself, and I’ve seen the same in him. The selflessness that love inspires… it’s just plain fabulous.
It reminds me of two things:
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Oh J.Crew,
What’s up with you? How is it possible that with such a gorgeous, playful, and rich color line of bridesmaid’s dresses, you don’t offer ties to match for the groomsmen? Srsly. How hard could it be… just take a bit of that leftover girly fabric, fold it over and sew it… right? With such a beautifully unique line of bridal options, can we just get practical for a minute and say, WTF?
I mean, I love love love our bridesmaids dresses. But now I’m stuck trying to find ties to match. And since I don’t own any of the dresses, and my bridesmaids all live in other states, I have nothing to carry around as a color swatch to compare against.
Let’s get with the program J.Crew. You’re thisclose to being full-service wedding clothiers. Help a sister out. Let’s take the last step together and put my tie dilemma to bed for good.
Wistfully,
Miss Meatball
Where did you look to find ties to match your bridesmaids’ dresses?
I’m sorry to have been so incommunicado lately, but I’m back from MaPo’s simply spectacular wedding!
Rehearsal dinner shenanigans
Here are a few teasers, to whet your proverbial palates!
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I feel fat today, and I want to sob.
I guess I should have knocked some wood, because right after my last post on the Flab to Fab series, I was tested and I failed. Sorry to be less than inspiring, but I just have to be honest.
Let’s start with the bad news.
The Food:
It all started last Tuesday, at buffet #1. Buffets are an overeater’s biggest enemy. Being a broke overeater makes it even harder to resist. I mean, c’mon, a seemingly endless sea of gourmet goodies… for free? I ate way too much. Worse, as I was eating, I knew it was wrong. “You don’t need that cake,” I’d say to myself, “you’re not even hungry!” But still I ate it, with shame in my heart. It was the most powerless I’ve felt in the 3 weeks since making this wed-solution. I really let myself down.
So, you’d think I’d learn from it, right? Hold on, as I take you on my downward spiral of diet despair.
Next came my birthday last Friday.
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***Mr. Meatball, you best stay away. My dress ain’t in here, but some other ones are, and I know you just don’t wanna go there.***
Alright alright, I’ve heard your plaintive cries regarding my wedding dress, and I will do what I can to ease your pain.While I still have to keep my actual dress a secret, to preserve its anonymity from Mr. Meatball and any other wedding guests who may or may not be blog stalking me, I do want to share a bit more about what makes it special… beyond the fact that it’s mine, yo!
You may remember me mentioning that I worked off part of the cost of my dress by helping the designer around her studio. The designer, Deborah Lindquist, is an eco-responsible green clothing genius. She’s known primarily for her use of recycled (or reincarnated, as she calls it) cashmere and leather, out of which she designs incredibly chic, funky and drool-worthy fashions.
Can I get an O-Ma-Ga?
The lovely and talented Amanda at VintageGlam has just started up her own wedding photography business, Nistor Photo. It’s clear her good taste bleeds over into shooting, as she has an enormously keen eye and some gorgeous shots on her website already!
For a limited time, she’s offering engagement sessions to local LA/OC-area brides for $150! That includes a disc of high-resolution images for you to use any way you please… Guest book? Save the dates? Table numbers? Yes, yes and…
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