Weddingbee Blog

Mr. Aardvark and I love kids. We are lucky enough to have a number of kids in our family who will be in our wedding. We are having three flower girls and a ring bearer. One thing I really wanted to do-up right was the thank you gifts for the children. They are all fairly young (between five and two) so I wanted to make sure their gifts were age appropriate, but I also wanted to make sure it was something they could have as a keepsake as they grew up.

After a bit of brainstorming and memory searching, I came up with an idea that I thought was brilliant. When I was little (and now) I loved “treasure boxes”: any wooden or plastic box totally captured my imagination. I would fill them with pretty rocks or fall leaves or earrings my mom had lost the match for. I still have a couple of these “treasure boxes” to this day, and I use them as jewelry boxes.

Mr. Aardvark and I decided treasure boxes (filled with candy treasure) would be fun enough to feel like a real gift to a little kid, but still something they could keep their whole lives.

Of course, just buying pretty boxes would be too easy. So, I decided to paint my own!

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I’m not sure if you have caught the drift, but this is a kid-friendly wedding. Our family and friends are prolific, we adore children, we are asking people to travel from all over to celebrate with us, and kids make for AWESOME SAUCE shots on the dance floor. When I am weepy during the wedding I am going to guess that one of those kids will do something to make me smile or at least make it so I am not sobbing with a serious ugly cry face…

And with these mugs in mind:

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We both love kids. We can’t wait to eventually have our own kids one day. But, did you all see Mrs. Zebra’s kids-at-wedding recap? That little girl, while just being young and carefree…she successfully photobombed several crucially important photos. While we love children…sometimes a wedding just isn’t the place for them.

Image via Mrs. Zebra / Photograph by Sara Zarrella Photography

One of the very first discussions we had about wedding planning was whether or not to invite anyone under 18 to the wedding, family or friend. Since we’re having an evening black tie invited (optional) wedding…
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All too often, we engaged folk find ourselves engaged in a bitter conversation about whether or not we’re inviting children. I want to let you know that through my experience, I am completely and totally supportive of either type of wedding; child-full or child-less. The reason, I believe, that parents become so frustrated with non-children weddings is because it is a statement on their parenting; their ability to control their children in social functions. Also, finding a babysitter can be a real bitch. If I were to travel in my time-machine we would have been more selective of the adults we had invited, rather than the children. We still would have invited children to our wedding.

The facts:

• We had over 20 children at our wedding.
• They ranged in age from 3 to 13 (at which point I stop referring to them as children)
• We only had an issue with one child.
• It was not the child’s fault.
• This child was an “and guest” but I had verbally confirmed I was more than happy that she attend.
• The parent was a relative whom I was very close with growing up but had not seen more than a handful of times in the past decade.

At the risk of sounding completely self-involved, our wedding cost us quite a bit of money.

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I know a lot of people are leaning towards not inviting children to weddings these days. All of our guests with children are coming from out of town, and I feel bad about separating families for the weekend…plus, I love kids. The things they do are so funny. Want extra reasons to invite kids? They make good use of the dance floor and take really cute photographs.

Image via leodjphoto / Photography by Leo Djiwatampu

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When super excited, I relax my Midwest sensibility and default to West Coast vernacular. Forgive me, but to properly start I can’t help saying…

DUDES!

The DIY project I’m about to share was hands down the most fun, affordable and quick to assemble. I’m talking about providing entertainment for the 20 or so children we expect as guests.

A few Bees from past generations shared their cute ideas for kiddie activity bags, including Mrs. Lox, Mrs. Toucan and Mrs. Martini. For ours, I’ll begin with the price.

I spent $34 to create 24 of these fun little surprises. Yay for the budget! No lie, each completed bag cost a whopping $1.41 each. That’s right, one dollar and forty-one cents. Can you even get a cup of Starbucks drip coffee for that price?

Easy peasy and cute to boot!

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She’s here! After ten long months of waiting and growing, baby Sand Dollar has finally made her entrance! Little Charlie is already a total sweetheart, we can’t get enough of that little face. And her Papa can’t be any prouder; they’re already best buds.

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While Macs and I hoped for an adults-only celebration, it wasn’t in the cards. A few of our nearest and dearest are traveling great lengths (we’re talking internationally) to come celebrate with us. There’s no way we’d expect them to leave their little ones back home, let alone at a hotel with a sitter they’ve never met.

Everyone has assured me their children are well behaved but I’d like to stack the deck in our favor just to be safe. I know the foofers will be a big hit, what toddler doesn’t like throwing things? But I needed something else to keep them occupied up until that point.

Coloring books are quite popular but any old ones simply wouldn’t do. I was going to illustrate my own (yes, I’m that crazy) but that idea was immediately thrown out the window when I found these:
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Obviously, our wedding is going to be very colorful. That’s kind of the point of the whole rainbow thing. To add even more fun and color to the event, I had a very early idea of including crayons somehow, but I wasn’t sure exactly what I was going to do. I know a lot of people have some kind of coloring or activity book for kids, but I thought it would be more fun to include some kind of activity book/coloring component into our programs so everyone could enjoy them. (We all pretend that it’s only the children who get bored during the wedding ceremony, but let’s be honest—sometimes us adults do, too, especially while waiting for the ceremony to start.)

We haven’t finished making our programs yet, but I did get started on the crayons this week. Since I want everyone to color, I will need crayons for everyone, so I knew I needed to get started as soon as possible. I didn’t want to just hand out a box of crayons and be done. I wanted it to be unique. Of course, I thought I came up with the world’s most awesome creative wedding idea ever, but then I logged on the world wide web and found out I’m not that clever. Oh, well, I still like the idea, so I’m going with it.

First, I bought this mold on Amazon. Obviously, if you have a theme for your wedding that would be better suited to a different shape of mold, you would want to get that. Hearts are kind of an unofficial theme of the wedding, so I went with them. I stuck with a silicon mold because it can be put in the oven. Then, I stripped all the crayons naked, like so:

(This is an easy job to get other people involved in. Our best man was hanging out at our house and expressed an interest in helping with wedding stuff. I gave him a box of crayons and he went to town. Once he found out he could use a knife to strip the paper, he enjoyed it quite a bit.)
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So as I’ve mentioned a few times before, there will, in fact, be children at our wedding. We could go over tons of reasons why and why not to have children at a wedding. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer or decision there. We decided to let them be there because I simply hated the idea that someone we love would miss our wedding because they couldn’t find a babysitter. So there it is. Children will be there.

That doesn’t mean I like the idea of bored kids running around, making noise at inappropriate times, or photobombing us. I do like the idea of kids dancing, having fun, and not being bored so their parents have to leave early. So, dear hive, what is the best way to keep children from getting bored? Give them something to do! This was the one project Mr. Lox has wanted since we first started wedding planning. And since he really hasn’t asked for much throughout this process, he was always destined to get his way here. So I started dreaming up ideas for activities for the children.

And we came up with this…

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OK, I seriously love kids. I think they’re cute and fun to be around, and I like to pinch their chubby little cheeks.

Look, hive! I even have evidence. I spend every Wednesday with this little munchkin.

She doesn’t know it yet, but she totally loves those Harry Potter glasses.

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Over the past couple of years we’ve been incredibly blessed to be a part of our close friends’ lives as they experience the joy of parenthood. Our own lives have been enriched so much by the presence of these little ones that when we envision our wedding party gliding down the aisle—gals dressed to the nines, guys all snazzy and fine—it simply isn’t complete without a little maid and man to round out the procession. Plus, Mr. Tartlet is cray-cray about kids. Having them around is a surefire way to plaster a grin on his face (see picture below). Allow me to introduce the two wee ones who are likely to steal the show. First up, my cousin’s adorable daughter:

Those CHEEKS! *pinch pinch pinch*
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Oh hush, not that word. This word is Children.

We’ve already covered that despite our love for kidlets, there won’t be any at the Bacon Big Day. So what am I writing about them for this time? Have I changed my mind? Have I figured out a way to include the kids without them being there? Nope.

Source

This is about the after.
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Catch up on the entire After “I Do” series here! And if you have a burning question you’d like to see discussed, submit it here!

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Are/were you and your SO on the same page when it comes to having children (or not)? Have your views on having children (when, how many, etc.) changed since you were engaged or first married? If so, what changed your mind/views/timeline? Bee parents: How did you and your SO decide when you were ready to start trying to have children? Did any specific life events influence your decision?

Ah yes, the baby timeline. I had it all worked out. We’d get engaged, get married sometime the next year, wait a year and then get pregnant…then have a second one when the first was about two…that would make us 36 and 38 at which time we would figure out if we wanted a third. The funny thing about timelines, is that they seem so necessary…and to a certain point, they are…I mean, it would have made no sense to wait ten or so years to experience our marriage and then have a baby because we didn’t get married until I was 32 and he was 34. But the reality is that sometimes timelines are just too much pressure.

Have we followed our timeline pretty consistently? Sure. Would it have killed us to have strayed from the timeline? No…it probably would have helped us feel less pressure. The truth is, there is no GOOD time to have a baby. Sometimes the best timing is the unexpected timing because without it you wouldn’t understand how much control you have to relinquish when you have kids. period.

I will say, that the most comforting thing that my husband and I experienced when making that final yes-we’re-ready-to-try-to-start-a-family NOW decision was witnessing two of my most eccentric and opinionated and unique friends have a baby together and seeing how it both did and did not change who they were as people.
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Before I say anything else, I have to tell you all that I love babies. Love. Them.

(source)

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