Weddingbee

So, why am I taking a chance writing in this space where I am clearly not the target market? Easy. The target market (you) have a fiance or significant other. I fall in that category, and I have made some very stupid (albeit generally innocent enough) mistakes in the last eight-ish months of wedding planning. Your other half shouldn’t say those things. And, while context is king (and/or queen) in all relationships, there are probably a few lessons learned in the Pineapple household that can help out anyone.

1. The light’s always right.
Miss P is the dedicated designer of all print media associated with our nuptials. One day, during our bus ride home, she wanted to show me the proofs. I thought it best to wait until we got home where we’d have a nice, big dining room table to spread out the cards and plenty of light. I was wrong. It doesn’t matter where you are, dummy. Just say yes. I’ll give you (and me) the benefit of the doubt, here - you’re excited about all of this to some degree, even it’s just because she’s excited. So, say yes. And be careful not to drop those proofs on the floor.

2. Knowing she’s the expert isn’t enough.
I have the privilege of being engaged to a designer, and a damn good one at that. She’s also a photographer. So, when someone like that (or her other photography/design kin) is asking for my input, it’s easy to feel like an idiot (I’ve become used to it in all facets of my life, not just in these interactions). “I’m the only one in the room who’s not a photographer, so just tell me where to stand and I’ll do it,” is a remarkably self-aware and cooperative statement, don’t you think? Well, try harder. A couple of suggestions here and there go a long way, even if you know bridesmaids, family, and other friends are better at all of this. Be a springboard for her brainstorming. You may even find a detail or concept that is really important to you. I wholeheartedly trust all of her ideas/decisions about the decor, the invites, all of it. She trusts that my differing opinion or other suggestion(s) show a bigger investment in the end product. So, win-win.

3. Filter your pie hole, Pie Hole.
Inertia. It’s a law of physics. The first law. It happens. Even in wedding planning. Learn to handle it. Your timeline, assuming it’s more than the “Hey, this happy hour was great; let’s get married in twenty at the MGM Grand Chapel” version, is going to have periods of a lot of planning and other periods that are slower. There will be waiting. There will be time to be patient and thankful that there are weeks when a payment isn’t due, a coordinator doesn’t need to be called, and a hotel doesn’t need to hear from you. Trust in that fact.

Trust in it, dear reader, so steadfastly that the words “Can we not talk about weddings for one night?” never ever ever cross your lips. It won’t matter how bad your day (week, month, etc.) has been at work. It won’t matter that your friendly bus driver has been replaced by a mongoose with a Red Bull IV and a love for demo derby. And your witchy next door neighbor with a strange attachment to that specific on-street parking spot doesn’t count, either. None of those reasons will do. So don’t say it. Some days, The Wedding will develop a mind of its own, and it will control her. Some days, though she won’t admit this for years, she’ll have Wedding Fever. It’s like Buck Fever in the corners of the world (like Western PA) where deer hunting is king. Guys with Buck Fever will shoot a rifle (a rifle!) at their best friend if they get too obsessed (and his buddy mistakingly leaves the Blaze Orange jumpsuit in the truck). Be thankful she’s only shooting questions, photos, and other wedding-theme-colored paraphernalia in your direction. The bullets will only start flying if you say something stupid.

As much as I’ve just rambled, the three core lessons in there are clutch. It won’t take much to show her that you care, but that little bit will show a lot. And, if you step back from it, she probably pretends to care about random sporting events and fantasy leagues more than you realize. To your advantage, you’re not pretending. Just be smart about it.
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I hate to say it, but these are all pretty ugly options. The wedge is ok, but not great. I also don’t really want my toes peeking out anywhere.

On the other hand, I am seriously considering just wearing the cowboy boots that Mr. Pineapple bought me for my birthday. I wear these boots (or my black pair) every time I wear jeans, without fail. I love love love them. They are perfectly molded to my feet, they have a heel, I know I can wear them all day and they were a gift from Mr. P.

I was already planning on wearing them for the reception so I can get my cowgirl line dance on, but I am not sure they are “nice” enough to wear for the ceremony and photos.

As you can see, they are pretty well worn and I will probably wear them another 140 times before the big day. The tops of the boots are stained with the dye from my jeans.

I definitely welcome any suggestions you have for me, you all have such great ideas!
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I was worried that this was a sign of bad things to come. Since David’s has such a poor reputation I assumed something would have to go wrong. However, they were super accommodating and said “of course we wouldn’t want you to take a dress home that wasn’t perfect!”

Two weeks later I got another call, that my new dress was in! I went solo this time to inspect it and pick it up and it was perfect!

After a 20 minute ride home in the passenger seat, my dress is now in my hands! I was worried, because that is what I do, that my dress would be somehow delayed or the order lost.

The only place I could hang it was on the back of the door to our guest room. Our closet is much too full and the guest room closet is too short. So there it hangs, at least for now.

Anyone else have a snafu with their first gown?
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Clockwise: mediterranean sausage stuffed mushrooms, roast tenderloin canape, five spice sea scallops wrapped in bacon and bbq duck wrapped in bacon

Main Courses:
Pecan and roasted shallot stuffed chicken with orange frangelico cream

Scallion and shrimp crusted salmon

Truffle scented chicken breast with wild mushroom marsala sauce

Parmesan grouper with smoked tomato buerre blanc

Choosing the “winners” was a lot easier than we expected it to be, all four of us were nearly unanimous on all counts. Each of us kept score on a print out of the menu. We decided to go with raspberry brie canapes (which I scarfed down before talking a photo), the sea scallops, crabcakes and mushrooms. For the main courses; the pecan stuffed chicken, the shrimp crusted salmon and a vegetarian dish that we have not tasted.

We were completely stuffed and excited after our tasting, everything was very yummy. So far this has been one of the wedding tasks that was purely fun. It was also great getting some of the future in-laws involved, something we aren’t able to do often.

What has been one of your most “fun” wedding tasks?
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Item 2:

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A Rachel Denny cable knit deer head

Item 3:

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Brake Rotors
(They are pretty essential to making your car stop, mine are warped and rusted. It would be super nice to stop at a traffic light without my car shaking violently for 100 yards first.)

Item 4:

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A Tulip Farm!

Item 5:

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A cooking class with Alton Brown, for Mr. Pineapple

Item 6:

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Season tickets to either the Pittsburgh Pirates, Penguins or Steelers (in that order) for Mr. Pineapple

Item 7:

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A fancy schmancy new camera.
Now technically I could register for this, but unfortunately none of my family members have several grand to throw at me.

What would be on your dream registry?

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Mr. Pineapple will be wearing the solid copper tie on the right. We got a great deal on these ties at Macy’s. We dropped in to check out the selection after attending a fairly traumatic bridal show and lo and behold there they were, job done.

Has anyone else left this much up to chance as far as attire is concerned? How did it go?
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One of the very first decisions I made about our wedding was concerning the bridesmaid’s dresses. Since I have long distance relationships with all but one of my bridesmaids I knew it would be a nightmare trying to get them together to get the perfect dress for everyone. I also want my bridesmaids and best friends to feel pretty and comfortable in what they are wearing, who doesn’t?

So, I decided on letting each girl pick out any black dress they wanted. My only request was that it be tea-length. Here is the “vision,” these dresses are from J.Crew:

Black is not very exciting or unique, but I am so relieved I went this route. It is one less decision I have to make and no one has to pretend they love the dress I have picked out, if they don’t.

As far as shoes, accessories and hair? Eh. Whatever they want.

Anyone else going this route?

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I stumbled upon her etsy store while browsing around a few blogs last week. I immediately sent her an email and asked if she would be able to create the flowers for our wedding. I didn’t even give it a second thought. Since my centerpieces will be made out of paper, why not bouquets of clay?!

Here are the kickers 1: they cost the same as what I had budgeted for real flowers, 2: they will last forever and 3: it will prevent me from adding another DIY project, I think I’m up to 10 or 11 now and haven’t even begun to post about them!

So far, Diane has been an absolute joy to work with. She provided me with a quote and asked about some of my favorite flowers. I sent her the following inspiration images and color palette:

{image a la Miss Flamingo}

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Although I have some idea of what I would like - vintage, a little rustic, muted - I want to leave as much up to Diane as possible.

She will be creating my bouquet, 5 bridesmaids’ bouquets, groom’s bout, 5 groomsmens’ bouts, 3 mom corsages and 3 dad bouts. Whew… she has her work cut out for her. In a few weeks she will have some sample flowers ready for me. I cannot wait to see what she comes up with!

They will probably be a bit heavy to carry and I know some of my more traditional guests will think this is crazy, but I am stoked.

What do you think? Anyone else not using real flowers in their bouquet?
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I have until June 20th to return them if for some reason I change my mind.

As far as what to put under and around the candles? I am still not sure. I will probably go with 10″ or 12″ mirrors from saveoncrafts.com ($2.39/each) for under them and of course the paper roses somewhere. I may also go with Michael’s to purchase the mirrors. It turns out they would be $1 each to ship which doesn’t really save on this craft.

I think there still may need to be another detail like ribbons around some of the candles.

Any suggestions on how to dress up the candles? Something vintage-y perhaps?
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My first several roses I attempted to do according to the video on Martha’s site. It didn’t go well. I almost pulled all of my hair out. Seriously, all of it. I had so much trouble with the floral tape. According to Martha and Cassie you are supposed to wrap each petal around the last and secure it with floral tape. Maybe it was the brand I was using, but it really wasn’t holding. I’ve used floral tape a lot in the past and never had this much trouble. So, I switched to double stick tape and wrapped the flower in floral tape after it was done.

Originally I was not going to post a tutorial because there is one on Martha’s site, but after all the difficulty I had I decided to show you how I was able to get them looking flower like. (you can click on the images to enlarge)

Here are the pieces:
You can download and print the templates from Martha’s site. Her templates show only one petal on each coffee filter, using 8 filter per flower. I cut out 2 or 3 petals from each filter depending on petal size.

Step 1:
Take petals 1 and 1.5 and overlap them. Poke a hole through both layers. Put the wire through the hole, bend it down and twist to secure.

Place a piece of DST (double stick tape) along the bottom edge of the petals.

Roll the petals around the wire and secure with DST.

Step 2:
Roll petal 2 around your bud and secure with DST.

Repeat with petal 2.5.

Step 3:
Roll petal 3 around bud and secure with DST. This one is a little difficult - you may have to play with it a bit to get the petal to wrap around smoothly.

Step 4:
Wrap petal 4 around bud and secure with DST.

Step 5:
This part is very awkward to try to hold onto while taping. Stick 3 of the number 5 petals around the bud and secure with DST.

Repeat with 3 more number 5 petals and secure.

Step 6:
Start to pull apart the flower and curl the petals. I use the edge of my scissors to curl as if I were curling ribbon for a birthday gift. You don’t want to curl them too much or they look like they are falling off the bud.

Carefully pull apart each layer of petals. The inner layers are tighter and don’t pull apart easily. The inner most petals don’t move at all.

As you can see, after this step you have a messy flower-ish type thing.

Step 7:
At this point I use more DST around the base of the flower to tighten up the outer petals and clean things up a bit.

You can also see if there are any holes in the flower where one or two additional petals are needed.

Add these petals and secure with DST, curl.

This is what your flower should look like at this point:

Step 8:
Cut about 8-10 inches of floral tape.

Wrap the floral tape around the bottom of the rose and about an inch down the wire. Pull the tape as you wrap and it will be slightly sticky. If you pull too hard it will rip and if you don’t pull hard enough it won’t stick. This stuff is tricky.

Step 9:
Fin!

This coffee-filter-sticky-awkward-frustrating-never-going-to-end project is definitely time and double stick tape consuming, but I am going to forge ahead.

Here are the first dozen paper roses:
If enough of y’inz are interested I can do a Bee-TV tutorial. What do you think?

Are you using non-floral centerpieces? If so, what are they?
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