So as I left off with my last post, there’s no wedding on the horizon for me! So many people were shocked by the news, because on the surface, we seemed normal and happy. But for me, this was a long time coming. When I first started questioning my desire to get married, I had doubts. Oh, so many doubts. Like Mrs. Woodpecker before me, I didn’t want to be that chick who called off her engagement. Is there a stigma for that? I wondered if this was just typical “cold feet” and wedding nerves, and if I was being ridiculous for thinking I might not want to get married.
I had SO. MUCH. GUILT. If I call off the wedding, we lose money, we lose our collective life together, the house, the pets, the bank account. I’ll devastate our families and friends, and I’M RUINING SOMEONE’S LIFE. Not just my own, but Monsieur P’s life.