8 of Your Most Embarrassing Sex (and Intimacy) Questions Answered

Intimate couple

We’ve all had them—questions we were too afraid to ask our parents or friends. With our society being relatively tight-lipped on the subject of sex, it’s no surprise that many of our unanswered questions come from our private lives. Don’t worry; you can get some answers without ever having to ask! We’ve picked out a handful of some common questions to save you the trouble.

1) Is it Normal to Pass Gas During Sex?

One question a lot of women are afraid to ask is whether it’s normal to pass gas during intercourse. A little gas during an orgasm is perfectly normal, although that doesn’t mean it won’t still be a little embarrassed when it happens. When you orgasm, all the muscles in your genitals relax, making it easier for gas in your digestive system to pass through. If this is highly uncomfortable for you, you can try some gas tablets with simethicone in it before you are planning sex.

2) Can Kegel Exercises Lead to Better Sex?

Absolutely! The stronger the muscles in your genital area (called pubococcygeus) are, the more intense your orgasm will be. This also helps strengthen everything from your anus to your vagina, urethra, and bladder.

The first step is to locate these muscles. Try stopping your urine flow while you are going to the bathroom. Start and stop it several times, holding it as long as you can before releasing it. Don’t do them regularly while urinating, as this can cause urinary issues, but try doing these while you are sitting at your desk, 50 to 150 times.

3) Will My Vagina Be Noticeably Less Tight After I’ve Had a Baby?

Pregnant woman

Believe it or not, the tightness of your vagina has nothing to do with age or body type. If you’ve had an overly large baby, your vagina might be a little looser, but by doing kegel exercises, you can strengthen those muscles again.

4) Why Can’t I Orgasm During Sex?

Believe it or not, about 10% of women have never had an orgasm from vaginal intercourse alone. Plain old vaginal sex does not necessarily hit a woman’s nerve centers in the right way; there are a lot of women who cannot have an orgasm without clitoral stimulation. There is nothing wrong with you or your partner. Just talk to them about it and have a conversation about what you would like to change in your sex life. Make sure he or she is revving up your engine to high throttle beforehand and you are more likely to orgasm during sex. Amp up the foreplay. Get out the toys. Use lubricant. All of these things might help push you over the edge into that mind-blowing orgasm.

5) What Is a Normal Amount of Orgasms?

There is no normal. Women have been known to have as little as one to having multiple. I say if your partner is really into your pleasure, he or she will be more willing to make sure you’ve had multiple orgasms before penetration. The big thing is talk to your partner. I can’t stress that enough. Find out what he likes to do. Does he enjoy giving oral sex or does he feel like it’s a chore? Does he like to watch you pleasure yourself? Many men are turned on by this. Is he or she willing experiment in new positions or playing with enhancement items such as dildos, vibrators, blindfolds, or restraints. If you want to try restraints, be sure you play safely and have a pair of heavy bandage scissors close by in case there is a need for quick release.

6) Why Do I Feel Like I Have to Pee?

This is a good thing! If you have the sensation that you need to urinate, it means he’s hitting the right spot and you should be having an orgasm soon. In retrospect, you might do what is called “squirting.” Researchers argue whether this action is really urine or the fluids produced in the vagina to lubricate the area for penetration. Whatever it is, go with it because it’s perfectly normal usually means you’re going the right direction.

7) Is There Something Wrong with Me if I Get Turned On by Watching Other People Have Sex?

Actually no, this is very normal. There are lots of men and women both who enjoy watching pornography as a way to get turned on. There’s also things like romance novels that can have the same outcome without the visual stimulation. Use your imagination as you read and go with it! You might find you’ll be taking your partner into the bedroom for a little fun.

8) How Come I Don’t Enjoy Sex Anymore?

Older couple

As people get older, some lose the desire to have sex with their partner on a regular basis. First, you need to examine why. Is it because you’re no longer attracted to your partner? Is it because you haven’t been able to make intimate time for just the two of you? Kids, jobs, household chores, and life in general makes it hard to have time to be intimate without interruption. You need to make time for the two of you. Send the kids to their grandparents once a month overnight. Or, hire a babysitter and go rent a nice hotel room. This doesn’t make you a horrible parent; it makes you human.

If there truly is an issue with intimacy between you and your partner, talk to a counselor either together or separate. There may be something beneath the surface that is preventing a meaningful connection.

We all have questions we are terrified of being laughed at for asking. If you find it hard to break the silence with your parents or friends, there will always be ways to get help, so don’t stop looking!

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