The 1st Affair
A married man was having an affair with his secretary.
One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon.
Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM.
The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.
He put on his shoes and drove home.
“Where have you been?” his wife demanded.
“I can’t lie to you,” he replied, “I’m having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon.”
She looked down at his shoes and said: “You lying bastard! You’ve been playing golf!”
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son.
They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.
The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.
He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.
He told his wife: “There’s no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!
Have you been fooling around behind my back?”
The wife smiled sweetly and replied: “Not this time!”
Nov 26 / Sunday
I went to sleep at 6pm on Saturday and woke up at 6am the next morning (hahaha), but BOY DID I FEEL GOOD! So it was a 12 hour power nap. Shut up and stop laughing at me. I was tired man! But in the morning I was so psyched to head out because the hubs booked a land tour. Bora Bora, show me what you got biotch!
Nov 25: Sat So we arrived in Tahiti at 4:30am and it was dark out. This woman was passing out little flowers to put behind your ears, and we were greeted with music that told me that I was going to love this place and never want to leave.
Our friends Tracy and Will got married in 2005 at The Seamen’s Church by the South Street Seaport in Manhattan. It was a small wedding – I think it was definitely under 100 people. Afterwards we went upstairs to have hors’douvres and cocktails. The room was beautifully decorated with pink and fushia colored paper lanterns and cherry blossoms. Then we all got in our cars and drove to East Manor Buffet for the reception where 500 people were invited and let me tell you, the Chinese know how to partay! I mean they REALLY know how to partay.