Please indulge my melodrama for the duration of this post.
My go-to pic to illustrate melodrama
After the rehearsal dinner, the bridesmaids and I headed back to the hotel for a girly sleepover. We watched silly wedding shows, drank some wine and looked up hairstyle ideas on Pinterest (nothing like waiting until the last minute, ladies). This should have been a fun, relaxing night, but instead I was a ball of nerves.
I know, I know. I was about to marry the hottest guy on the planet and have a big, special party in my honor—there are worse fates. I shouldn’t have a right to complain when there people worse off than me in the world, like those who still wear pleated pants or have never been exposed to the salted caramel mocha. I admit it, I really should have just been grateful to have bridesmaids.
As the party wound down, I got a little worried about going to sleep. I wasn’t very tired, and I felt sick to my stomach. I panicked. And as the other girls drifted off to sleep (trust me, they were all friggin snoring) I just lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, feeling sicker and more nervous.
Photo by Jennifer Shaffer Photography
This picture still makes me nervous to look at.
I thought back to my practice trip down the aisle, when everyone looked at me, and I imagined how it would be at the real ceremony. I was paralyzed with fear and anxiety. Then I started getting emotional about moving away from my family, and feeling guilty for making all these people come into town for my wedding…basically everything I felt after my shower was coming back, and I felt icky.
And this is how I looked the next day. Not pretty.
You know how, when it’s dark outside and you can’t sleep, whatever’s worrying you just gets worse and worse? And when you wake up the next day, you literally see everything in a different light? It was like that, except I still felt terrible the next day. So not at all like that.
I finally drifted off to sleep and managed to get about four hours in before I woke up for good. I wrote my wedding morning post (which, now that I look at it again, reads very much like this post) before my bridesmaids got up, and then it was time to hit the ground running!
Was the night before your wedding calm or full of anxiety? Did you sleep alone, with your fiance, or with friends?