Mr. Dragon and I are, in many ways, opposites. I’m a capital-P Planner, while he’s more spontaneous. I worry about little details, but as long as the big picture looks OK he’s happy. Once I get an idea in my head I’ll fight for it, no matter how minute an issue it is. He’s more the unflappable type.
Personal photo / Screwed up suspension one hour into a 10,000 kilometer trip? No biggie. Meanwhile, I sat on the ground eating granola bars and thinking about how I was surely going to die at some point on this journey.
When it comes to wedding planning, that plays out as follows: Mr. Dragon’s concern is that we, by the end of the day, are married, and our family can be there, and there will be beer and food, and people will have fun, and he won’t faint. My concern is all of that PLUS what kind of flowers we’re going to have, what the invitations will look like, how we will decorate the tent, on and on into eternity. I’m quite good at sweating the small stuff.
At first I tried involving Mr. Dragon in every wedding decision we had to make. It’s his wedding, too, after all, so I imagined he’d want to have a say. Turns out he doesn’t really understand a lot of the logistics of wedding planning, nor does he care. Dude couldn’t tell a dahlia from a daisy and that is not a problem for him.
We decided decor, flowers, and anything involving bridesmaids would be firmly in my territory. He wanted to dress the guys as he chose, which was fine by me. (I recently had a dream that all the dudes were wearing bright yellow suits, which Mr. Dragon took as a subconscious sign that I’m actually deep-down worried about the male style aspect of this shindig.) As a graphic designer he called dibs on invitation/save-the-date design, and I took on the task of researching photographers.
The who-plans-what method we eventually sorted out was that Mr. Dragon will have some specific tasks delegated to him, and I will handle the rest. When there are big decisions to be made (photographer, music, hotels) I will narrow down the options and present Mr. Dragon with a handful from which we can both choose.
Some grooms, from what I understand, are gung-ho and want to drive the wedding-planning bus. Some take a backseat for the whole ride. My groom is somewhere in the middle, and that works for both of us. The end result will hopefully be a personal, carefully planned wedding that is a reflection of both of us (with or without yellow suits).
How involved is your partner with major decisions?