A Guide to Being the Groom

Groom in a blue suit and pink tie

In many cases we often hear of the bride taking charge of the wedding. She makes the decisions, gets her female friends and family members involved, and has a pretty clear vision for her special day. While this might be common, it doesn’t mean a groom can’t plan his own wedding or that his only job is to show up on time. A lot of men actually enjoy being involved in the planning process, and pitching in when and where they can. And they should. It’s their special day, too!

For any men who have found themselves wondering what to do after their wonderful spouse has said yes, here is a simple guide to being the groom.

Take Initiative

Planning a wedding is a lot of work! And while your future spouse might act like they have it all under control, it doesn’t hurt to take some initiative. Show them that this day means just as much to you by taking charge when appropriate, before they even has to ask. The last thing you want is a freak out because they’re stressed and you were simply waiting for a sign.

Show Interest

Couple planning a vacation

This is a special day for the both of you. Even though many women stereotypically get excited about wedding planning, it’s important that you plan it together with your fiancee. That means you should at the very least show some interest in this phase. If they want to know what you think of the flowers, do your best to give an answer. And if you really don’t care, instead of saying that you don’t care, just agree with their plans.

Do your best to show up to every vendor meeting. This goes a long way in showing you’re interested and that you care, and your fiancee will be extremely thankful to have you there to help make the decisions.

Speak Up

Make sure you share your ideas and opinions with your spouse-to-be. Talk about what matters to you when it comes to your wedding. While you may not have a preference for the venue decor or the invitation design, you might care about the menu, the playlist, or the venue.

A lot of people actually do want their future husband’s input. There are so many choices and it can be hard to make definite decisions. Speaking up about the things that are important to you will make it better for everyone.

Make Decisions Together

Some things should actually be planned together, like, for example, the first dance. This is going to be a special moment, and the song should be selected together. Other things that should be decided on as a couple include the wedding date, the location, the budget, ceremony details, and the guest list. These are the big things when it comes to planning a wedding, and everything else centers around them.

Make Your Own Decisions

Groom and groomsmen

Of course, there are also things that you need to decide on your own. For the groom, that includes choosing his groomsmen and best man. While you need to agree on the number of people you want in the wedding party, who you choose will depend solely on you.

You will also be responsible for what you and your groomsmen are going to wear. The actual style might depend on the wedding theme or what the rest of the wedding party is wearing, but you will be in charge of getting them to the tailor to have each one measured and fitted. Doing this means finding out everyone’s schedules and booking the appointments, and that’s your responsibility. Your fiancee already has their side to worry about.

One more item that is obviously your responsibility the bachelor party. While you won’t be planning for yourself, you’ll probably want to be involved. Let your best man know your wishes (what you want and what you don’t), and hopefully he’ll follow through.

Have Gifts Ready

It’s common for the groom to thank his best man and groomsmen with a little gift. A lot of grooms also choose to purchase a gift for their spouse to open morning of the wedding day as well. Be sure to have these gifts thought out and purchased well in advance so you’re not scrambling last minute.

Plan the Honeymoon

Planning a honeymoon is a lot easier than planning a wedding. Many couples choose to have the groom take the lead on this one, but you can ask your fiancee to be involved. Surprising your significant other can, however, give it that extra touch of romance, so if you’re up for the job, go for it!

Be Present

Bride and groom romance

On the day of the wedding, it’s important that you are present in every moment. This is a special day that should be meaningful and memorable. As such, it’s best to keep drinking to a minimum and know your limit.

While you should have your phone nearby for emergencies, stay off of it otherwise. Don’t bother with social media or checking your email until the next day. The rest of the world can wait.

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