Is Elopement for You?

Private couple

Have you ever joked about just eloping when the stress of wedding planning got to you? It’s a common saying among couples about to get married because let’s face it, planning a traditional wedding is a big job. There’s a lot of pressure on the couple to get it right. Everyone has certain expectations for what your wedding should be, not to mention your own expectations. Those ideas can be hard to live up to and trying to achieve that perfect day is no picnic. So what about eloping? Is it just a joke or should you really consider it? In order to figure out whether elopement is for you, let’s look closely at some of what you may be thinking about.

Feeling Guilty

Worried woman

The biggest issue with elopement is how you’ll feel about forgoing the big show. It’s hard to elope, especially if you have a close family. They are not going to be happy about missing you tie the knot, and there’s really nothing you can do about that. You could invite a small number of people, but that begs the question of who to include and who to leave out. Either way, you’re still depriving at least some of your family members of witnessing your commitment to each other. Think about how you’ll feel about this. It’s a bit easier if your family isn’t very close and you can just invite essentials like parents. However, if you start inviting too many people, your small elopement just becomes a small ceremony. Be careful because once you start inviting people the list can grow bigger and bigger until suddenly you’re planning a full-on wedding again.

Saving Moolah

One of the main reasons people elope is money. Weddings bills can run up extremely fast. Almost everyone who plans a full ceremony ends up spending more than they planned. It’s hard to keep a budget and stick to it. It’s also hard to budget when you have no money. You may want a large extravagant affair, but your wallet says otherwise! And is it really smart to put yourself in financial trouble just to provide your family and friends a viewing to you getting married? This is up to you, but keep the money in mind. You could come out of an elopement ready to start your lives together instead of worrying how you’re going to pay off the caterers.

Still Getting Pictures

Private wedding photos

If you’re concerned about documentation, don’t be! You can absolutely hire a photographer to shoot your elopement. In fact, elopements produce some of the most beautiful photographs. This is no accident. There’s no denying that less people around takes the pressure way off. Couples are more able to just be themselves when there’s no large crowd watching and waiting for an appearance. You will feel more at ease and the photographer can really take advantage of the sweet moments you’re now freed up to have.

More Private

Again, if you’re looking for something a little more personal and private, an elopement may be for you. It’s hard to have these text book butterflies in your stomach moments if you have stage fright. Or maybe you’re not afraid of crowds; you’re just a private person. Some people would rather choose a simple and small ceremony full of special moments and an elopement can certainly provide that.

Fun Trip

Couple traveling

The best part about planning an elopement is deciding where to do it. It can be anywhere from your own backyard to Paris. Once you’ve decided to elope, you’ve already saved heaps of money, so now you can decide where you want to go without worrying about the cost. Even if you flew across the world, you’d still not be spending the amount you would on a big ceremony. Consider that eloping might mean you get that trip to England you always wanted to go on.

No Gifts

The crappy thing about not having guests is that no one brings you gifts. You could still send out announcements of your elopement, but chances are not nearly as many people will send you gifts as they would have at your wedding. Many actually take offense to a gift request if there was no wedding to attend, so usually, you’ll probably only receive gifts from close family members if you’ve chosen to elope—as long as they’re not angry too.


Just because your ceremony was done separately doesn’t mean you can’t have a party. One way to do an elopement and still please everyone is to host a reception when you’ve returned home. This doesn’t have to be something big, just a party for everyone to congratulate you. People want a chance to be a part of your happiness. Give them that opportunity with a fun backyard or bar party.

Some people think eloping is selfish, but is it? There are definitely a lot of factors when it comes to determining what kind of wedding you’ll have. Calling eloping selfish ignores all the smart reasons why people do it. In this day and age a lot of people are trying to spend less and save more. Isn’t it more selfish to ask a couple that just wants to be married to spend themselves into a hole just to be a part of their big day? Don’t worry as much about others; decide for yourself. Is an elopement a mistake for you or the most freeing decision ever?

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