Second Weddings: Challenges and Questions

Bride holding a wedding bouquet

Whether your marriage just didn’t work out or your spouse passed away, the journey to “Happily Ever After” is filled with its own questions and challenges. The number one thing to remember is that your second wedding should be celebrated as much as you wish. We’ve answered some of the most asked questions when it comes to challenges and worries for your second marriage.

Can the Bride Still Wear a White Dress?

You may be surprised to find out that traditionally a white dress didn’t even mean purity. It was the color for celebration! Even Elizabeth Taylor on her eighth wedding could wear white. A white dress is traditional for a wedding, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go for ivory, cream, or even bright red if you want for your wedding. It’s your dress so wear what looks best on you. When it comes to the veil, etiquette is a little foggy. The veil does symbolize purity, but many modern day first wedding brides don’t even wear veils. They were traditionally worn so the groom couldn’t see the bride’s face before the wedding.

Bride standing by two bridesmaids

Should We Have Wedding Attendants?

Sometimes the thought of lining up eight loved ones in matching dresses is exhausting for a second wedding. It’s totally up to the couple to decide if you should have wedding attendants. If you want your best friends and closest family members standing next to you at this wedding, go ahead and line them up. Sometimes at second weddings parents even step in as wedding attendants to give them a different job than the first time down the aisle.

Who Walks the Bride Down the Aisle?

Many second time brides have their son(s) walk them down the aisle, but this is totally up to each bride. Some brides may find it strange to have their dad walk them down the aisle to give them away again. The tradition of a bride’s father walking her down the aisle is to transfer her arm from his to the groom stating that the groom is now taking his place in a sense as her caregiver. Many times a bride marrying for the second time will walk alone down the aisle. Again, it’s up to each bride.

How Can We Include Our Kids in the Wedding?

Many second weddings not only unite a bride and groom, but their children as well as they make a new family. Couples can choose to celebrate this by giving their children parts in the wedding. Sometimes daughters are the Maid of Honor(s) or the bridesmaids and a son can be the Best Man or groomsman. If you are having a religious ceremony, it can be a great idea to bring the kids together for a prayer with the officiant after you exchange vows. You can even include the children in your vows and read directly to them. Make them feel included and special on this day as it is one of the biggest days of their life as well. Talk to the kids to hear how they want to be included in the wedding and what makes them most comfortable.

Wedding Shower Dessert Table

Is It Okay to Have a Wedding Shower?

Combining two households that are probably pretty stocked can be difficult in itself. You not only probably already have a set of pots and pans, but your future spouse has a set as well. Just because you may be in the mode of getting rid of things instead of building your china collection doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate with loved ones by having a shower. You could set a fun theme for a wedding shower where guests give you cooking classes, gift cards to your favorite stores, books to build your little library together, or even gifts related to travel for a honeymoon or family adventure.

Is It Okay to Have a Big Wedding?

The first time down the aisle is often a blowout party, big and formal. Many couples don’t want to go through the stress of a big wedding the second time down the aisle so they go for a small event with close loved ones. Other times couples want to celebrate even more bringing together family and friends from both sides so they go all out with a huge event. Each couple does their own thing. Since the couple is usually paying for this wedding themselves the budget could be a big factor as to how big a party you can throw.

Friends drinking cocktails and looking at engagement ring

Should I Have A Bachelorette Party?

A bachelorette party should have no expiration date! Any excuse to get loved ones together for a good time and celebration is a great one. Second time brides usually have friends with kids, a full time job, and a spouse. They would probably love a fun night out on their own with their best girlfriends. Get everyone together and have a good time celebrating your new journey.

How Should the Invitations Be Worded?

Traditionally parents are listed at the top of first time wedding invitations because they are the hosts paying for the wedding. If you and your spouse are hosting your own wedding, go ahead and put your names at the beginning. If you want to honor your parents, you can include the line, “together with their parents” under your names. It is also important to note if the bride goes by her first married name or her maiden name when writing out the full name. Many guests may only know the bride by her first married name so it can be confusing.

Find Amazing Vendors