Meeting Your Partner’s Friends for the First Time

A newly engaged couple dines with their friends

It can be one of the most daunting parts of a relationship—meeting your partner’s friends. The anxiety of meeting your partner’s friends ranks right up there behind meeting his or her parents. What if they don’t like you? How do you act? What should you do to impress them?

We’ve got a few ways to help you through this exciting and anxious time.

Be Yourself Around His or Her Friends

Bringing two worlds of friends together can be scary because you want them all to fit in together like a perfect puzzle. You’re partner has known this group of friends since before you met one another, so they know him or her pretty well. The first thing to remember is you have to be yourself. You can’t walk into a room of your partner’s peers as a different person. You can’t be fake or they’ll see right through it.

Remember, they know your partner loves you for a certain reason, so they probably aren’t going to be too hard on you. Don’t worry so much about putting on an act of perfection, or they might not like you. You don’t have to show up without makeup and tell them about all your flaws, but you do have to be sociable and friendly. You may be shy, and that’s just fine. They’re going to love you for exactly who you really are.

The future groom meets friends of the bride at a party

Have a Party with Your Partner’s Friends

It’s a great idea to have a party at your significant other’s house or some other mutually comfortable place, so you can meet all his or her friends. Getting everyone together during a fun occasion will create an exciting atmosphere. Everyone will be having a good time and it will take the stress off of you trying to impress them.

The bonus for you is that you’re accustomed to your partner’s house, or favorite hangout spot, so you will feel more comfortable meeting them there. You can talk in groups or sit with their best friends on the couch just sharing stories. This is easier than meeting everyone at a dinner or a sporting event because you get to actually have one-on-one time with some of them. You get to party and meet one another at the same time, so everyone wins.

Ask About Your Partner’s Life

People love to talk about themselves. Ask your partner’s friends all about their family lives, work lives, where they grew up, etc. They’ll probably ask you the same things in return so the conversation is easy and flows. Listen to their answers and follow all of their stories. You might be bored to tears looking at pictures of some guy’s son playing pee wee football, but your face should shine with excitement.

An engaged couple dine with their friends at a restaurant

The next best subject is asking the friend how he or she knows your partner. Let people tell you about funny college stories or old nicknames they have for one another. You’ll have a blast hearing crazy stories that you’ve never heard before and create a new bond at the same time. You’ll also have something to rib your partner about for years to come.

Don’t Isolate Yourself

If you go to meet your partner’s friends and end up staring at your phone all night, you might not make the best impression. It’s one thing to be shy, it’s another thing to be rude. Try not to isolate yourself even if you’re shy and like to be in the corner. It’s easy to want to play on your phone to busy yourself, but make yourself put the phone down and engage with others. Just listen if you are a little too scared to talk. Your presence will be remembered fondly if you make at least a minimal effort to socialize with your partner’s friends.

Meeting your partner’s friends is a big step in your relationship. With some planning and effort, you can make sure that the new relationships you will have with your partner’s friends will be positive.

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