How to Get the Proposal You Want

Bride and groom holding wedding rings on cut piece of wood

We’ve all heard the “Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars” speech. Men don’t always think the same as women so it’s often hard for them to grasp the importance of the perfect proposal. I dreamed about this perfect proposal my entire life so I could only pray my boyfriend would make it come true. We’ve been married four years following what turned out to be a fairy tale of a night for me so I’m here to help ensure you have all your proposal dreams come true as well.

Don’t Force The Proposal

My husband and I dated four years before he popped the question. It’s important to know if your significant other is ready before you really start pushing the wedding stuff. If you do it too early, they may be flying out the door. Some people just aren’t ready to settle down and may want things in their life a certain way before heading to the alter. This doesn’t mean they don’t want to marry you one day, but it does mean today just isn’t that day. My husband wanted to make sure his job was stable and he was able to ensure our life would be comfortable before he could even buy a ring. You don’t want your honey to propose just because he feels pressured by everyone around the two of you. If you want your personal perfect proposal, you have to wait until both of you are ready or it’ll feel forced.

Couple laying on floor together talking

Drop Hints Without Scaring Them Away

It’s important to talk about the type of proposal you want. My husband swears I brought up the idea of eight bridesmaids on our first date which should’ve scared him away so don’t follow my lead, but get on the same track. You can lightheartedly talk about your dream proposal as you continue to date. You two probably know one another enough to know if you want a private, cozy proposal or a public, crazy one. Though you may still have some surprises up your sleeve. You may be a social person that loves to be with people, but want a simple proposal at home. You could also be a quiet, private person that actually dreams of being proposed to at a basketball game on the jumbotron.

I made sure my husband knew I wanted the proposal documented with photographs and video in front of a lot of people. I wanted to share my joy with the world, and to have a keepsake to share with loved ones forever. I dropped hints when I saw engagements online or someone getting proposed to on television. He knew if he was to ask me over dinner at home I might throw my food at him. My best friend wanted a quiet proposal without all of the fuss so her husband placed a note on her dog’s collar asking for her hand in marriage. He knew asking her in a flood of people just wouldn’t be her thing. You can talk about what kind of proposal you want without being a crazy girlfriend. If the two of you know an engagement is in the near future, it won’t be an awkward conversation.

Let Your Friends Do The Dirty Work

Your friends are your secret weapons when it comes to getting what you want, whether it be a wedding proposal or a simple birthday gift. Get them to talk to your honey in a subtle way. Tell your girlfriend who’s married or engaged to start up a conversation about how much you just loved her engagement story. Hopefully your honey will catch on to how much you loved or hated someone else’s proposal and take the lead. Leaving hints is the best way for your friend to catch their attention. Don’t let your friend bombard him with questions about when they’re going to propose and how they’re going to do it. Tell them to make general conversation about proposals as a whole. You never know, they may already have the ring and wondering just how to ask you.

Man proposing to a girl outside

Your Dream Proposal May Not Be Perfect

Remember it’s okay if things don’t go exactly your way. Your significant other is probably working tirelessly to create the perfect proposal, but sometimes life intervenes. My husband had a professional photographer waiting in the wings as we were supposed to get through this exhibit where he would ask me at the end of it. I woke up very sick that day and this exhibit was very cold so going through it would’ve been more of a nightmare than a dream. At the last minute he had to tell the photographer not to come and totally reroute his plans for the night.

You never know what might throw off the timing just a little bit. Anything from traffic to sickness can change plans at the last minute. Your significant other may have the entire proposal perfectly planned when nerves intervene and they end up dropping the ring and flubbing their lines. Just remember anything that throws off the perfect proposal provides a great story for the grandkids one day. Find the humor in the imperfections and be happy your honey tried to make all your dreams come true.

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