How to Navigate Personal Fallouts Over Wedding Plans

A young woman holding her phone and looking out the window with a sad expression on her face.

Planning a wedding can bring about stress in unexpected ways, and one of those revolves around disrupted relationships with people you were otherwise close to. While this is certainly an unfortunate part of the planning process for some, it is sometimes unavoidable. There are different tactics you can take in navigating these altercations, though, to help salvage the relationship and get through it with minimal interruption to this happy time of your life.

A Fall Out with a Bridesmaid

Bridesmaids wearing neutral-colored dresses and holding bouquets.

One of the most common issues that brides-to-be face is a fall out with someone she appointed as a bridesmaid in her wedding amidst the planning process. Whether this fight happens over what dress was chosen, issues over other people in the wedding party or something else entirely, these are tough to deal with. If this happens to you, the first thing to do is to take some time to step back from the situation and look at it from a calm and more neutral perspective. Many times, when we are in an altercation with a friend, it can be easy to say things we don’t mean and will regret later on. Taking some time helps mitigate that risk.

Another good way to help diffuse the situation is to ask for help from a neutral party. This could be another bridesmaid that is friends with both of you or someone else who knows both parties well. Sit down together and calmly go through the situation. The neutral party can act as a moderator with the goal of getting to the root of the issue and solving it.

Try to find a solution to the problem that you’re both happy with. If that’s possible, agree on what the next steps are, say your piece, and move on from the altercation. If there’s no feasible way to deal with the issue in a way that makes everyone happy, you may need to consider cutting ties with this individual as a last resort. If that’s the case, calmly and nicely tell them that you think it’s best you go separate ways and that this person is no longer involved in your wedding day.

A Fall Out with Your Future In-Laws

Sometimes it can be really tough to deal with the opinions, desires, and even demands that your future in-laws place on you when planning the wedding. Everyone has different ideas of how they want this special day to look, and when you’re the one actually walking down the aisle, that can get quite frustrating. Fall outs due to discrepancies in what one party wants versus the other are not uncommon when it comes to wedding planning. The best thing to do if this happens to you is to put yourself in the shoes of your in-laws. Likely, they are just extremely excited for this special event. Take time to calmly talk about their wants with them and consider which of them would best fit into your day. While you don’t need to give into everything they want for your wedding, making sure you honor at least some of their wishes is a nice gesture. If they’re too pushy, find a way to talk about that with them with your fiancé present as a more neutral party that can back you up. Be sure to stress that all of you have the same goal: a beautiful celebration of this upcoming marriage. Finally, find aspects of the day that everyone can get excited for in an effort to all get on the same page and to keep the peace during the planning process.

A Fall Out with a Friend

Two women sitting on the dock of a lake.

Another common occurrence when planning a wedding is a fall out with a friend. This could be because they’re not asked to be a part of your wedding or it could be related to something else entirely. Especially if this individual expresses disappointment that they’re not asked to be in your wedding party, make it a point to make them feel special and valued by you. Send them a card explaining how important they are to you. Another great way to navigate this issue is to ask this individual to do something else special on the big day, such as reciting a reading at the ceremony. While this could be a potentially uncomfortable situation for everyone involved, avoiding it just makes it even more awkward. Address it when you feel something is off to help push your friendship forward and mitigate the risk of losing someone close to you.

While wedding planning is fun, no one ever said it’s easy! Make the most out of your planning process and protect your relationships by patching things up if fall outs occur.

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