You probably hear a lot of “complaining” about how stressful wedding planning is. To be fair, depending on how sensational you want your big day to be, things can get a little hectic. But even if you’re organizing the wedding of the century, it doesn’t have to be as bad as you might imagine. There are many ways that people tend to make wedding planning more complicated than it has to be. Let’s look at the many mistakes couples make so you don’t have to repeat them yourself.
1. You Treat Wedding Planning as a Second Job
…too much. In a way, wedding planning is a second job—there’s no argument about it. But you shouldn’t feel as if you’re working a double shift in addition to your other daily duties. Remember, planning the best day of your life should be fun. Hence, to prevent yourself from becoming overwhelmed, it is important to use the same tactics as you would with normal work. That means taking breaks, limiting how much time you spend on it (whether that’s per day or per week), and knowing when to take a “vacation” from the planning process.
2. You Get Hung up on Small Details
Unfortunately, there is no such thing as a perfect wedding. Even the stories you hear about on TV or read about in magazines have one or many things that go wrong. If you’re a perfectionist, this may be hard to accept but it’s the truth. Hence, it’s best to expect that some things won’t work out as you intended. But if you’re prepared for it, it won’t be as big of a blow as you might imagine right now.
One of the best ways to prepare is to imagine the most likely worst-case scenarios and come up with a plan B. Wedding insurance is a simple way to go about this.
3. You Take on too Much
Usually, one person in the relationship takes over the planning process—either because they’re the most enthusiastic or because they’re a bit of a control freak. While for some people that might not be a problem, for others it’s just too much to handle.
Ideally, both soon-to-be newlyweds should be involved, even if the duties are skewed. No one should feel like they’re taking everything upon themselves. So, never hesitate to ask your significant other for assistance. Don’t forget to also enlist the help of your wedding party or other friends and family, if possible.
4. You’re too Worried About Money
Finances are a major stressor in any matter. And since weddings tend to be far more expensive than people imagine, it is an even bigger issue for newlyweds-to-be. To avoid this, it’s crucial to not only be organized when it comes to money but also be realistic in what you can afford. Sure, you may want a lavish wedding, but is that feasible in your situation?
In addition, most couples tend to spend more than they expect. You just have to accept that fact. Therefore, it’s generally a good idea to have a budget that allows you some leeway.
If you feel that money will be an issue no matter what, it may be best to not rush the engagement and take the time to save up instead. Loans, unless they can be easily paid off, are never recommended.
5. You’re not Organized Enough
A messy environment can wreak havoc on your concentration and stress levels, which is why organizational tools such as wedding planners, apps, or websites are a must-have. You can even make a DIY wedding planner by just buying a binder with dividers. It’s a small change, but it will help ease the headaches.
6. You’re Highly Competitive
Thanks to social media, we’re constantly comparing our lives to others’. Even more so when it comes to weddings. You want to go above and beyond and assure that your wedding gets the most Instagram likes.
This is a bad approach to take. No two weddings are alike and each one is special in its own way. A royal wedding is by very nature going to be different than a 20-person gathering in a small town. But what does it matter if both couples are happy in the end?
7. You’re Just a Worrywart
Some people have high levels of anxiety even with simple tasks. That’s completely fine, but it’s also something to keep an eye on. If you’re that type of person, now is the best time to learn a few useful skills to keep your anxiety at bay. Mindfulness, for example, is one of the best tools in this situation. And if you’re really struggling, don’t take therapy off the table, either.
And, last but not least: remind yourself that a re-do is usually possible. You can always organize a second photoshoot, renew your vows, or have another cocktail party. If not immediately, you always have tomorrow.