What Your Wedding Planner Should and Shouldn’t Do

A bride shopping for wedding dresses with her wedding planner.

A wedding planner is someone who’s meant to make your planning process and the actual day of your wedding smoother and easier. And while this is a well-known fact, there definitely is some confusion regarding what requests are and are not appropriate to make of your planner. Although these individuals are there to do a wide range of things for your big day, there are definitely some requests that are inappropriate. Get the full run down below.

Appropriate Wedding Planner Requests

There are seemingly endless things your wedding planner can expertly handle when it comes to planning and executing your wedding day.

Overseeing Your Budget

Creating and managing a budget is a monotonous and somewhat tedious task that not everyone enjoys doing. Have no fear, though, because this is something your wedding planner can work through on your behalf. It’s perfectly acceptable to request this of your planner, given the fact that you provide him or her with the appropriate input that they need to formulate the budget and keep track of it throughout the process.

Working with Vendors

Your planner is a good person to vet wedding vendors, coordinate meetings with them, and even attend meetings with these vendors with you present or on your behalf. This is one of the most valuable things your planner will do, as they know all the right questions to ask as you plan each facet of your wedding.

Sending Invites and Tracking RSVPs

A woman holding a wedding invitation with a wax seal.

Another somewhat tedious task associated with wedding planning is stuffing, sealing, addressing, stamping and sending invitations. This is another task you can request that your wedding planner take off your plate. Along the same vein, your planner can track your RSVPs as they come in, which is very helpful.

Setting Up Your Wedding Website

Wedding planners have undoubtedly seen their share of wedding websites, making them pretty well-versed on what to include on yours. Feel free to put this responsibility in their hands, just remember to give them all of the information they need from you as well as set the expectations with them correctly as far as your vision for the site goes.

Keeping Guests in Check

Have a rowdy crew coming to your event that you want your wedding planner to keep their eye on? That’s no problem. Wedding planners are great at tastefully controlling any guests that get unruly or are over-served. They can help mitigate issues before they become a scene at your reception.

Inappropriate Wedding Planner Requests

There are some things that cross a line, that you definitely should not request of your wedding planner.

Acting As a Counselor

Your planner is not there to act as a counselor for you and your fiancé or between you and family members. As feelings and disputes arise, resist any urges you may have to involve your planner as it’s not socially appropriate. If the dispute involves a wedding planning decision, feel free to ask your planner’s input, but don’t put them in an awkward position. Your planner is also not responsible for breaking news to family members or others involved in the wedding, so be sure not to make that request, either.

Doing the Job of Your Vendors

A sign at a wedding with arrows pointing to the cocktail hour, photo zone, and ceremony.

Unless otherwise noted in the contract you sign with your wedding planner, it’s not their responsibility to do what the vendors are hired to do. This includes arranging flowers, setting up chairs, lighting candles, and folding napkins. Be sure to have a good understanding when working with vendors leading up to your wedding of what they will be doing on site the day of your wedding, to highlight any gaps that need to be filled in the site set-up.

Keeping Track of Your Wedding Party’s Items

While the planner is there to focus on the bride and groom throughout the day of the wedding, you will want to set the expectation with your wedding party that they’re not there to tend to their needs or items. This is because the requests from your wedding party could start to pile up, and that will distract your planner from yourself and your new spouse. It’s not your planner’s responsibility to keep track of your wedding party’s personal items, so ensure that he or she isn’t asked to do so on the big day.

This list allows you to be a better client and work more seamlessly with your wedding planner from start to finish as you get ready to walk down the aisle.

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