Introverted Brides: Tips for Getting Through the Wedding
I’m not kidding. There’s a big part of the wedding I’m NOT looking forward to.
To be clear, I’m ABSOLUTELY on board with being Mr. Wishbone’s wife. I’m 100% psyched for the marriage. But when it comes to the wedding, I’m a wreck. I’m the opposite of excited and glowing—I’m nervous.
Here’s the thing. I’m super introverted. Not in the “Oh, I sometimes like to be alone” way, but in the “if I could avoid seeing people for weeks on end, I’d be my best self” way. And yet, we’re having a 140(ish) person wedding. Where people will be paying attention to me. And talking to me. And taking pictures of me.
I’m tired just thinking about it…and I know by the time the wedding’s done, I’ll be just plain exhausted. After all, being around groups of people is seriously draining for me.
Now, we’ve considered eloping. But both of our families are SO excited for a big, happy event after a number of funerals.
So instead I’m working with my long-term therapist and our month-of coordinator to come up with a plan to get me through the wedding WITHOUT losing my mind.
And no, it doesn’t involve a giant cardboard cutout of me for people to take photos with…but I did think about it. It also doesn’t involve bringing the dog…but you can bet I’ll bring tons of pictures of her…like this one.
So, gratuitous dog photo aside, what’s the plan? Well, we’re still working it out, but here are the basics:
1. Planning LOTS of alone time before the wedding. I’m probably going to stay on my own for a few days leading up to the wedding, so I at least have evenings to myself. Plus, I’ll make sure to schedule an hour or two of solo time every day. And the day of the wedding? I’ll be getting up early to get personal time, not getting ready with a huge crew, and scheduling a few pit stops in the bridal suite during the wedding.
2. Meditation. I’ve begun playing more on the Headspace app, and I really find it can keep my anxiety at bay, so definitely making sure I have meditation time the day of the wedding—even between the ceremony and the reception.
3. Prioritizing visits. While big groups freak me out, I DO want to spend time with the people who are coming to the wedding. They’re our nearest and dearest, or they wouldn’t be invited. So I’m trying to get a sense of everyone’s schedule, and I’m figuring out where I can schedule smaller-group events, catch up sessions, etc. That way, we can spend quality time and not feel as frantic the day of the wedding.
4. Keeping friends close. Having people I can lean on when I need to retreat a bit is helpful, and luckily Mr. Wishbone is a talker—so sticking close to him and letting him do the talking from time to time will be a helpful refresher. Also, the whole day I know I’ll be surrounded with people I love, from the dear friend doing makeup to our very special officiant (more on that later). So focusing on loved ones will help.
Does anyone have tips for managing a wedding as a total introvert? I’d LOVE to hear them.